Letting Go
by IPP
Summary: Vegeta's feelings get the best of him one day, but his pride refuses to allow it. Hurt, romance, and acceptance ensue, leaving the Prince confused of his feelings, with no choice but to follow the heart he thought he never had. GokuxVegeta. MPREG. COMPLETE.
1. Loss

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop **

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for awhile. I seriously hope there's no late fees…

Warnings: Slash (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta, swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, the list goes on.

Summary: Vegeta's feelings for Goku get the best of him one day, but his pride won't stand for it. Events that follow prove to change him forever. Summary sucks (as always). Just read.

Author's note: -hangs head- This is starts out really terribly, but gets better as it goes on. There are quite a few POV switches too, but I'll leave you to figure out who's who. It's pretty obvious. Lotsa weird material in this story. And uke Vegeta too! -grins- Enjoy my first serious piece of GxV writing.

--

**Chapter 1: Loss -**

_He screamed._

_Screamed because he couldn't take it anymore. He couldn't endure the humiliation, the defeat. The constant reminders that he was a failure to his legacy. To his long-lost people. To himself._

_He heard nothing but the royal blood pounding in his ears as he staggered to his feet, eyes narrowed with loathing. The man before him, battered and bloodied to a similar extent, widened ebony eyes in confusion; a gesture so reminiscent of the innocent child he once was that it did nothing more than feed the Prince's fury._

"_You okay?" the taller questioned, taking a cautioned step back. The Prince snarled in anger, ignoring the expression on his enemy's face as he struggled to hold himself upright. He wouldn't lose. His desires would not prevail. He would get rid of the traitor before him once and for all. _

_The larger of the two stared at him, dropping arms that could break the world in a gesture of surrender. "Please, what's wrong?" he pleaded, his concerned expression somewhat alien to the normally jovial features. The Prince choked on his own warm blood, vision cloaked with red. The bastard would pay for this._

_He would _not_ be humiliated again._

_Taking a pained look into the other's inky black eyes, he raised an arm swiftly over his head, energy flickering in his outstretched palm. The orbs he stared into widened considerably, following the path of something down the side of his face. He stiffened, feeling the hot liquid seep from the edges of his eyes. The Prince stopped his advance on his foe, lips parting as he drowned in the worry on his last subject's face. No…he would not surrender…_

_Raising his arm once more, he limped forward yet again, halting only when he was eye-to-eye with his prey. He coughed raggedly, crimson life essence staining the metal floors beneath his feet, and forced himself to stare his tormentor in the face._

_It was a mistake._

_He welcomed the warm oblivion in his enemy's arms, royal tears soaking the blue-clad chest in which he buried his head._

--

Vegeta woke in a panic, bloodshot eyes snapping open. Gloved hands dug into the moistened earth, soil compacting between his shaking fingers. How long had it been since that moment? Months? Hours? He spat, disgusted at his own weakness.

Grunting in pain, he forced himself to his knees, tail curling warily around the narrow waist. His abused legs twinged painfully and he let his eyes fall shut, head hanging in shame. The fight he had continued for decades, the war he had fought against the one person he hated as much as he loved, was over. He had finally lost.

Kakarrot knew.

The tears began to come again, but Vegeta made no effort to wipe them away. The damage to the last shreds of his pride had been done. There was no use in attempting to salvage something so useless and broken.

Shuddering breaths soon developed into guttural sobs, and the kingdomless Prince let himself fall to the ground, rage replaced by hopelessness. Kakarrot would never respect him now. Hell, how could he expect anyone to after he had allowed his feelings to get the best of him like that? His hopes for regard, let alone love, were as good as dead.

_Love_. Vegeta sneered at the thought. It had been an eternity since he had felt anything close to it. Needless to say, when it had reentered his life in the form of the brawny warrior that was his last remaining subject, the Prince had been confused to say the least. Confusion had turned to rage, and rage to hopelessness. As if the beautiful bastard would ever see Vegeta as anything but an underling. Someone to be pitied. Something to be forgotten.

The Prince wasn't someone who put a great deal of trust in words, let alone anything else. Despite Kakarrot's numerous claims of friendship, Vegeta knew that the former would never understand the way that he felt. He bit back another sob.

The urge to stand left him completely and the Prince simply layed there, existing, knowing that no one cared whether he was alive or dead. He was just so _tired_ of it all. The blood, the pride, the pity. He wanted to leave it all behind.

Vegeta never heard the tear-stained warrior step closer.

--

Goku bit his lip, eyes fixed on the sobbing, shaking form at his feet. Kami, what had he done? He had only been trying to help. Was all of this his fault?

The tall Saiyan hung his head, torn between taking the trembling Prince in his arms and IT-ing to the farthest planet he could find. He didn't understand. Had his efforts to comfort Vegeta really brought about this much pain? The Prince had never looked so distraught and hopeless.

Goku frowned. What was making the Vegeta cry like that? Was his breakdown merely because the earlier incident had subjected his pride to a rather harsh blow, or had Goku seriously injured him during the battle? From the looks of Vegeta's wounds, the gentle Saiyan supposed that it had to be both.

The shuddering sobs pulled at his heartstrings, and all the restraint in the world was not enough to keep Goku from kneeling down next to his Prince. A tear slid down his battered cheek. No…Vegeta…

The lithe Saiyan's eyes snapped open, their owner freezing in place.

--

Chapter one XD; TBC. Please R&R.


	2. Care

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop **

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there's no late fees…

Warnings: Slash (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta, swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, implied masturbation, the list goes on.

Summary: Vegeta's feelings for Goku get the best of him one day, but his pride won't stand for it. Events that follow prove to change him forever. Summary sucks (as always). Just read.

Author's note: This chapter is…interesting. Some parts of it appear to be censored out, but I kinda have a habit of letting my readers piece together the story rather than explaining all of it in detail. Have questions? Email me. Enjoy. And PLEASE leave a review, constructive criticism is always appreciated!

"_Text"_ - Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

--

**Chapter 2: Care -**

Vegeta blinked in disbelief, mouth opening and closing wordlessly. No…not now…The idiot _couldn't_ be here now…

The characteristic scent reached his nostrils, affirming the Prince's worst fear. Kakarrot was right beside him. He flinched inwardly, pain and humiliation trickling through his chest like cold water. This was the end. The third-class bastard had come to taunt him, to demolish his pride like an already cracked mirror. And there was no way in Hell that Vegeta could escape it now.

The Prince sighed, a sob threatening to escape his raw throat. He needed to see Kakarrot's face one last time, just once more before the gorgeous traitor broke what little hold on sanity he had left. Grunting, he forced himself onto his side, ebony eyes tracing the silhouette of his obsession's powerful form, the wonderfully taut muscles on gentle arms, the face so handsome that Vegeta couldn't keep himself from whimpering brokenly at the sight of it. He would give absolutely anything to fall into those arms one final time, to drown in those endless eyes…

--

The observer sucked in a deep breath, staring into the ebon orbs below him, fascinated as well as worried by the conflicting emotions that flashed through them much too fast to read. One look from his Prince, however, and the tall Saiyan was petrified. Vegeta's gaze held so much…_pain_, an agony that words alone seemed insufficient to describe. The glance sent shivers down his spine.

Goku was abruptly jerked from his trance when Vegeta sighed sadly, almost a whimper, and his tear-brimmed eyes fell shut, all signs of vitality vanishing from the lithe body. The gentle Saiyan's lips parted in horror, hands moving of their own accord to slide under the Prince's seemingly lifeless form. Goku quickly pressed a finger to Vegeta's lower jaw, sighing with relief when he felt a surge of royal blood throb against the digit. His Prince had merely fainted.

Unable to tear his eyes off the smaller's visage, which seemed to remain astonishingly beautiful despite its owner's lack of consciousness, Goku carefully raised Vegeta into his arms, ignoring the possible consequences that this particular action might have later. There would be time for that. There would be time for everything.

Casting a final concerned glance at his Prince's pained face and bruised body, Goku raised two fingers to his forehead, flickering out of sight.

--

Materializing once more into the small house, the tall Saiyan sighed with relief at the lack of noise, happily recalling the fact that his wife wasn't home. Chichi had gone off on a 'business trip' (her claims of which Goku had known to be fictitious ever since he had starting smelling the scents of other men lingering about the house) and, in truth, Goku had to admit he wasn't much displeased with her infidelity. He did feel twinges of guilt from time to time, knowing that his own actions had likely driven her away. But the lack of the yelling and stress her mere existence seemed to provoke seemed to more than justify the means.

Thoughts wandering back to his Prince, the gentle Saiyan softly shifted him in his arms, holding him tightly against his chest. His eyes traveled slowly over Vegeta's broken body, lingering on a particularly nasty wound that marred the soft, tan skin of his chest. Goku gulped, noting the amount of caked blood that had adhered itself to the Prince's hair and clothing, and bit his lip nervously. He would need to be bathed.

Sighing, the tall Saiyan lay Vegeta down on the large bed, gently sliding off the boots, then the gloves, one at a time. Goku unwittingly slid his hand against Vegeta's before pulling back quickly, exhaling sadly. This wasn't the time to admire the Prince's physical form, wonderful as it was. He felt ashamed for even thinking of his own personal desires.

A few minutes passed before Goku was able to fully strip the smaller Saiyan of the torn spandex that clung to him, mostly because he was trying to protect Vegeta's privacy by not letting his eyes wander more than necessary. Finally, after he had relieved himself of his own clothing, Goku gently lifted Vegeta to his feet, careful to support his weight. Slowly, he carried the unconscious Prince into the adjoining bathroom, slipping into the shower and turning on the water.

Steam floated about the warm air as he began to wash the smaller Saiyan, sliding a bar of soap around the bruised muscles before letting the stream of water rinse them clean. All desire turned to worry at the sight of Vegeta's abused flesh, the blood-crusted tail that hung limply between his thighs. Goku silently cursed himself for injuring his Prince so badly.

Biting his lip, Goku allowed his thoughts to drift back to the spar they had fought earlier that day. It had started out normally enough, him and Vegeta putting their all into the battle, blood and sweat and curses flying back and forth about the Gravity Room, but there had been _something _about the Prince that was different than usual. Though the tall Saiyan hadn't been able to put his finger on it at the time, he now realized that Vegeta had seemed less focused than he often did. More senseless and angry than calculating and cool. Well, before _it_ had happened.

Goku shivered. He had never in a million years thought that Vegeta would trust him enough to allow that kind of vulnerability, to fall into his arms and cry into his chest. While the gentle Saiyan had assumed that the Prince's tears were due to physical pain, he now realized that there was something more behind those soulful eyes. Something deeper. Something that hurt much worse.

He shook his head detachedly, switching off the showerhead and blanketing Vegeta in a towel. He stared down concernedly into the smaller's face. What was hurting him so terribly? Was it something that could be healed?

Walking back into the bedroom, Goku carefully dried his Prince, noticing with relief that most of his wounds had stopped bleeding. Bending over in an attempt to dry Vegeta's lower back, the larger Saiyan felt his eyes widen, his ebony orbs scanning over the area in surprise.

There were scars, many around the area near Vegeta's tail, as well as others closer to his neck and shoulders. Goku frowned. He was as much of a warrior as the Prince, but he didn't have _that _many scars. And his own weren't nearly as deep or jagged-looking.

Putting the thought out of his mind, he walked over to his closet and dug out a pair of loose, black pants that he had outgrown. He gently slipped Vegeta into them, tying the drawstring tight so that they would stay up around the narrow waist, and allowed himself to steal another glance at the Prince's face, feeling oddly guilty for doing so. The lithe Saiyan appeared to be unconscious as before, mouth slightly open, angular eyes closed. Goku was both relieved and saddened by the discovery.

Grasping Vegeta as gently as possible, Goku pulled back the bedcovers and set him down on the mattress, covering him with the sheet. He cocked his head to the side, observing a particularly dark bruise on the Prince's right arm, reaching out instinctively to caress it before pulling back guiltily. Suddenly, an idea popped into the tall Saiyan's mind, causing him to raise himself from the bed. Reluctantly tearing his eyes away from the object of his concern, Goku conjured up an image of Kami's Lookout in his head, leaving the bedroom behind as he pressed two fingers to his head.

--

"What do you mean you don't have any senzu left?!" Goku's eyes widened to an almost comical size, hands flailing out in front of the tall Saiyan.

Piccolo rolled his eyes. "I mean I don't have any." the Namek grunted, arms folded. "What's got you so excited?" He affixed Goku with an annoyed gaze.

The Saiyan looked down in disappointment, mentally apologizing to his unconscious Prince. "Nothing, Piccolo." he said quietly. "I just thought you'd be the guy to ask, since I've already visited Korin."

Goku bit his lip. He had really hoped that he would have been able to get some senzu back home before Vegeta woke up, but it looked like the latter was forced to heal naturally. He felt guilty for being unable to help his Prince.

Piccolo raised a hairless brow, watching Goku's distraught expression with slight concern. "Why do you need them, Goku?" he inquired. "You seem to be in pretty good shape."

"It's not for me…"

"For who, then?"

Goku gulped. "Well…Vegeta. H-he's hurt."

The Namek's eyes widened, glancing back at the tall building at the center of the Lookout. "I guess we could go find Dende." he suggested. "He might have a few in stock somewhere."

Slightly discouraged by the fact that this trip seemed to be taking longer than he had expected, Goku quickly followed Piccolo to the tall doors, sighing as images of his injured Prince floated through his mind.

--

Vegeta awoke to darkness, pain shooting mercilessly through his aching muscles. He slowly opened his eyes, confused by his surroundings. Where was the ground on which he had fallen? The Gravity Room?

Suddenly, the memories began flooding back, Vegeta's eyes drifting shut again in humiliation. Kakarrot. The bastard had found him. He remembered now.

He shifted onto his side and gasped at the unfamiliar sensation, wariness numbing the soreness in his body as thick blankets slid over bruised flesh. Why was he in…a bed? And what was tied around his waist? Pulling the covers off gingerly, he gazed down at the clumsily-knotted drawstring of his new pants, a look of terror creeping onto his visage. Kakarrot's scent hit him and he froze, shaking his head detachedly in denial. He had been brought here. He was in the third-class' bed.

Too weak to react physically in any way, the Prince let himself fall back down to the mattress, taking a deep breath despite himself. The tall Saiyan's scent pervaded every corner of his half-conscious mind, sending shoots of heat directly to his groin. Vegeta let his thoughts wander, only half aware of where he was, while images of his past materialized before his mind's eye. He felt Frieza's punishing lashes, the comforting hands of Raditz as they stroked his abused back, his own shaky gasps for more.

He groaned. Anything to take the pain away…anything to forget…

Muffling a sob, Vegeta turned around once again, hand sliding slowly downwards to rest between aching thighs…

--

A little smile crept onto Goku's face as he waved goodbye to Mr. Popo, the precious brown pouch clasped in his right hand. As it had turned out, Dende did keep a few extra senzu beans at the Lookout in case of dire circumstances. Though it had been a bit of a battle getting the teenage Namek to hand a few over, as the latter hadn't truly been convinced that there was actually an emergency going on and Goku was reluctant to tell him the details of what had happened, the tall Saiyan had finally gotten his way. He couldn't keep himself from sighing with both relief and worry, lips parting in thought. _"I'm on my way, Vegeta."_

--

Goku reappeared in his small kitchen, eyes darting towards the hall as he walked towards the bedroom. Reaching the door, he extended a hand and grasped the knob, freezing in place when the muffled sounds reached his ears. "Uhnnn…Raditz…"

The tall Saiyan's mouth opened slightly and he took an instinctive step forward, pushing the door open. Raditz? His supposed Saiyan brother? What was Vegeta…

Goku froze in place at the sight.

His Prince lay where he had been left, his lower half covered by only a single blanket, ribbons of pearly seed coating the mattress below him. Vegeta's shaking hands grasped the flimsy sheets, holding fast as if they were his last strands of life. Goku's eyes widened in realization, traveling up to the smaller Saiyan's tear-stained face, brow furrowing with confusion at the expression on his Prince's visage. Vegeta looked so…_broken_.

Taking a deep breath, Goku set the brown pouch on the bedside table, using all considerable will to keep himself from looking Vegeta in the eye. He didn't want to make matters any worse. Vegeta's pride seemed to be the only thing holding him together.

An empathetic tear trickling down his cheek, the tall Saiyan left the room, shutting the door gently behind him.

--

Don't worry, it'll get better --; Thanks for reading XD


	3. Secrets

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop **

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there's no late fees…

Warnings: Slash (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta, swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, WIFE BASHING (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), pretty much anything one can warn about.

Summary: Vegeta's feelings for Goku get the best of him one day, but his pride won't stand for it. Events that follow prove to change him forever. Summary sucks (as always). Just read.

Author's note (changes with chapter): A bit of a break from the severe angst, but this chapter still isn't what you'd call a happy-happy-joy-joy piece. Expect, rather, to feel some relief at how the characters are a bit more IC than in the previous chapters. No worries, you'll likely be keeling over in a fluff/sap induced stomach-ache in chapters to come. 3 I don't like to let my fics get TOO grizzly.

Bulla (Bra) doesn't exist in this story, just to clarify. Oh, and Trunks and Goten are in their late teens.

"_Text"_ - Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

--

**Chapter 3: Secrets -**

Goku woke suddenly from his position on the couch, a loud noise attacking his unprepared ears. His eyes fluttered open, falling on the white telephone that vibrated insistently on its receiver. Grunting with exhaustion, the gentle Saiyan hauled himself into a sitting position, tousled hair falling around his face as he grasped the object and raised it to his ear.

"Y-yeah?" he greeted rather unenthusiastically, the events of the night before having robbed any chance of a good night's sleep. Goku casted a worried glance towards his closed bedroom door when two separate voices assaulted his eardrums.

"Dad?" "Goku?" He squinted, shaking off the last vestiges of slumber. "Hey Goten, Trunks. What's going on?" The line was silent for a moment, both teens surprised at the elder's melancholy tone. After a few seconds of silence, Goten spoke again.

"Um, well we're at Capsule Corp. right now." A pause. "We've been feeling Vegeta's ki acting up lately. Yours has been a little weird too, Dad. Are you guys okay?" Goku was silent. He wasn't sure how much Vegeta would appreciate the last remaining member of his family knowing about his current state, but he didn't want to lie to their sons. Taking a deep breath, the tall Saiyan made his decision.

"I'm all right, Goten." He flinched despite himself. "And Vegeta…I'll make sure he's okay." Not waiting for an answer, Goku set the phone back down on the receiver, head falling into his hands.

--

The tall Saiyan grasped the cold door handle, biting his lip with worry and apprehension. It had taken him quite a while to decide whether or not he should check on Vegeta's condition, but the desires of his heart had finally won over the common sense in his head. Gulping, Goku pushed the door open, half expecting his Prince to attack him head on.

The bed was empty.

Sighing with both relief and surprise, Goku strolled towards the object of his confusion, sitting down upon it and running a hand over the cool sheets. One of the pillows still bore the soft impression of Vegeta's head.

Goku unwittingly turned towards the bedside table, eyes falling on the little brown pouch he had left the night before. Upon closer inspection, the gentle Saiyan realized that it had been pulled open, and that it held only half of its previous contents. He smiled at the two remaining beans. Wherever the Prince was, at least he was in good condition.

Moments later, the spike of ki caught his attention and he blinked, grin fading slightly as he rushed out of the room and headed for the back door.

--

He launched another powerful kick at his invisible enemy, eyes squinted shut as beads of sweat down his tired body. The salty scent of strenuous exercise met his sensitive nose, obscuring all rational thought, increasing the urge to fight. The Prince grunted, body falling still as his sore muscles throbbed with exhaustion. He couldn't stop now, he was a warrior. He refused to give up so easily.

Vegeta's head lowered as the cloudy, murky events of the night before reentered his mind. He could never see Kakarrot again, that much was clear. Not that the younger Saiyan would make any effort to search out someone as pathetic and useless as he was, anyway. The bare chest heaved.

His eyes fell shut in shame, tears threatening to well up. GodS, when had the Prince of all Saiyans ever been such a disgrace? He was the last full-blooded Saiyan left, by Kami! And here he was, feeling sorry for himself, crying like a child. Vegeta snarled, eyes snapping open. He'd be damned if he let Kakarrot win.

His mind chided him, however, before he could launch another brutal blow. He wasn't the last full-blooded Saiyan left, and he knew it. Kakarrot…Vegeta's eyes widened in shock and horror, a scent he knew all too well prohibiting any movement. The Prince gasped. Kakarrot was…_behind_ him.

--

Gulping with apprehension, Goku watched Vegeta's shoulders tense, his sleek tail puffing out around the narrow waist. The Prince already knew he was there. Deciding that it would be foolish to provoke Vegeta's anger further by waiting, he slowly reached out and placed a tentative hand on the sweaty, bare shoulder.

Before Goku had any time to ponder his actions, the Prince whirled around to face him, fists clenched and eyes narrowed. He simply stared at the elder in surprise, studying the handsome face, marveling at Vegeta's shockingly high ki. It was almost impossible for Goku to believe that this was the sobbing, broken Prince that had collapsed in his bed the night before.

Reverie fading at Vegeta's warning snarl, Goku hovered backwards slightly, amazement turning to concern at the anger in his old rival's eyes. He had expected that Vegeta would be pissed off when he regained consciousness, but the tall Saiyan found himself shocked at the amount of pure enmity in the Prince's glossy coal-black orbs. Goku nearly gasped at Vegeta's next statement.

"Don't you _dare_ touch me."

Hate seemed to drip from the choked words, the unadulterated hate sending a shot of pain straight through Goku's heart. He lowered his eyes. It would probably be best to leave Vegeta alone, to pretend that he didn't know about nor understand his anger. He had seen the pain, the agony behind those scalding eyes, and there was no way he was going to let Vegeta go through that.

Even though he knew that the Prince would never allow him the kind of companionship that he thirsted for, he couldn't allow Vegeta to face his burdens alone.

--

Vegeta scowled further, confused and angered by his foe's lack of response. The bastard was just _staring_ at him. Mocking him, no doubt. He could almost see the laughter in Goku's fake, teary eyes.

He bent down into a fighting position, fists clenched before his face as he tried to block his view of Goku's phony, concerned visage. Vegeta squinted his eyes shut. He would kill the traitor. He would blast him out of his head, crush his body into dust and let the wind carry every trace of him away.

_Away_. Yes, that was what he wanted. He wanted Goku to go, to vanish into thin air and never enter his thoughts again. He needed to forget about the third-class, to terminate all memory of him, to pry him out of his mind. Out of his heart.

Without warning, Vegeta launched himself towards the object of his hatred, swinging a trembling fist towards Goku's unprotected chest.

--

Eyes widening, the tall Saiyan extended a hand, catching the Prince's wrist in his grasp. He let out a startled breath. Vegeta was attacking him? What had he-

Goku's thoughts were abruptly halted when Vegeta swung his other fist, a hateful gleam shining in narrowed eyes. The gentle Saiyan dodged the blow once again, raising his remaining hand and wrapping strong fingers around the powerful wrist. Gripping the Prince's hands firmly, Goku raised his eyes in shock, skin tingling at the sensation of flesh on flesh.

--

Vegeta looked up, humiliated beyond speech. He couldn't move. He couldn't fight back, couldn't pound the life out of the being whose existence had plagued him since the day he had set foot on this miserable rock of a planet. Kakarrot's scent even made it impossible for him to breathe.

Mortified, Vegeta stared back into the kind, innocent eyes, torn between drowning in them and trying to burn them out of their owner's skull. His breath hitched as he observed the gentle lines of Kakarrot's features, the finely shaped lips, the tousled bangs of black that framed the pale skin of his rival's kind face. His own visage hardened as he came back to reality. No. He wouldn't let himself be swept away.

--

Goku blinked, wondering whether or not he should ask the questions that floated through his mind. He didn't want to make Vegeta uncomfortable, but he did want to...help. The tall Saiyan took a deep breath, mouth seemingly moving of its own accord.

"Vegeta...tell me..."

There was so much he wanted to ask. _Tell me about Raditz_, he might have said. _Tell me about your life. Tell me why you're so sad._ However, as hard as he tried, the words simply wouldn't come out. He felt like the fool Vegeta always called him.

Sighing, he lowered his eyes once again, preparing for the struggle, the anger, the growled words that told him that Vegeta could care less about his curiosity. But he didn't just _want_ to understand. He needed to. He needed to make his Prince feel better. His other desires suddenly seemed to pale in comparison.

Seconds passed, to his surprise, and the fight did not come. Vegeta simply hovered in the tall Saiyan's grasp, mouth closed and eyes wide, as if in thought. The expression was unreadable.

--

Vegeta watched the last remaining member of his race, unknowingly shaking his head. He was going to forget. It was all he could do.

Eyes narrowing for a final time, Vegeta swung his weight to one side, smacking his right foot into Goku's unprotected head. He watched as the latter's eyes fluttered shut, chin dropping to rest on the muscled chest as the tall Saiyan's grip began to loosen. Only half aware of his actions, Vegeta grasped one of his enemy's hands, halting the slow descent. He sighed, unable to look into Kakarrot's face, and slowly lowered him back down to Earth, laying him on a patch of grass beside the small house.

Shoulders dropping, Vegeta turned in midair and flew off in the opposite direction, the only sound his heartbeat thumping in his ears.

--

"Get UP!"

Goku jolted awake at the offending noise, eyelids slowly drifting open. His head throbbed terribly. Kami, where was he?

Eyes opening further, the tall Saiyan hoisted himself up, blinking as his surroundings came into focus. He almost groaned at the sight that greeted him.

Standing less than a foot away was his overbearing wife, arms folded and eyes narrowed. Her foot tapped impatiently on the ground as she leaned in, scowling into Goku's face.

"So, you've decided to wake up, have you?" She glared further, teeth grinding together as she fisted a hand into Goku's shirt. "Great timing! I guess taking a little **nap** on the lawn was more important than coming to pick me up, huh?!"

The gentle Saiyan rubbed at his eyes, brow furrowing as he raised himself to his feet, gently dislodging the woman's hand. What? Pick her up? What was she talking about?

Instinctively, he raised a hand to the back of his head, brow furrowing. "H-huh?" he inquired, still rather drowsy and confused. Chichi gaped, the look of surprise turning to one of extreme vexation.

"What do you mean, huh? You were supposed to come get me from my meeting THREE HOURS AGO!" She sighed with exasperated anger. "But it looks like YOU were more interested in sleeping a bit out here, weren't you? Or have you been training with Goten all this time? I swear, Goku, if you keep ruining his future like this…"

"Stop." The Saiyan's voice was quiet, yet angry. He was sick of his wife ragging on him all the time, mostly because he knew very well about her numerous affairs with other men, and he simply couldn't allow her to control his relationship with his sons any longer. Goten and Gohan meant more to him than anything in the universe.

To his surprised, Chichi leered at him, staring directly into his eyes. "I've told you before, Goku." She spat the name from her mouth as if it was dirt. "I won't have you messing around with my sons. Your little training matches are just ruining Goten's chance for a good education!"

Goku glared. "They're my sons too, Chichi. And don't try to pretend I'm not a good father to them." He paused. "I've made Goten happier than you ever have."

Chichi scoffed. "He needs to get a good education, not to go out and fight like an animal! I'm the one taking care of him! If I had let Goten keep that disgusting tail, he would have grown into a monster like YOU!!"

"That's ENOUGH!" Goku rose to his full height, taking a deep breath. "He's not a monster, and neither am I. He's a great kid. I won't have you demeaning him any longer."

The woman's eyes widened when he took a step back. "N-no, Goku." Chichi's voice went from demanding to pleading in a matter of moments. "Don't leave, p-please."

The Saiyan turned his back, hoping to the gods that he would never have to see his wife again. He closed his eyes momentarily, a pang of guilt shooting through his chest as he braced himself for a final statement.

"Goodbye, Chichi. Go be happy with your other man. I hope he's less of a monster than I am."

Sighing, Goku bit his lip and sped off into the distance, realization hitting as his aching head twinged painfully.

"_Vegeta…"_

--

Ze chapter three! It'll start gettin' sappy soon. XP


	4. Caught

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop **

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there's no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta, swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, WIFE BASHING (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), pretty much anything one can warn about.

Summary: Vegeta's feelings for Goku get the best of him one day, but his pride won't stand for it. Events that follow prove to change him forever. Summary sucks (as always). Just read.

Author's note (changes with chapter): I'm so glad I started this =) This fic is proving to be a lot more fun than anything I've done in a loong time, and this is my favorite chapter yet. Anyways, this chapter is dedicated to everyone who has reviewed thus far. Names are below:

LadyEval, silverstorms (anon.), Dragon77, listenserendipity, Zofonik, Lavender_Blood (anon.), Saere.

Thank you guys so much for letting me know what you thought of my first few chapters! I think a lot of you will like this one, especially those who have been wanting Goku and Vegeta to get _closer_. -duck tapes mouth shut- I've said too much!

_~Text~ _ - Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

--

**Chapter 4: Caught -**

Vegeta hovered silently among the trees, legs crossed and eyes closed. A defeated breath left his slightly open mouth, the rushing of the river below unable to drown out Kakarrot's final words. _"Vegeta…tell me…" _The Prince couldn't suppress a shiver at the memory. He had fled the scene like the coward he was. It just didn't seem fair that Kakarrot had such _power_ over him.

What had the idiot expected him to say, anyways? What was it exactly that he wanted to know? He couldn't understand why Kakarrot was showing so much interest in his feelings. Nobody had ever really cared about his emotions before. Well, no one except Raditz…

The Prince groaned. He truly missed the companionship of his royal guard at times, the only Saiyan that knew of the pain and suffering he was put through. Fully unaware of his surroundings, Vegeta let himself be swept up into a memory, thoughts rippling like water as a cold wave of his past crashed over his mind, foaming out into a sea of darkness.

--

"_Mmmm, Raditz." The Prince ran a gloved hand through his lover's long mane, comforted by the strong arms that held him against the large, naked body beneath. A trilling purr burst forth from his throat and he mumbled incoherently, the guard's broad chest rumbling in answer as a calloused palm stroked his side. "Well, my Prince," Raditz addressed him suggestively, pleasant lethargy thickening the already gruff voice. "What do you say? Up for another rou-" His question was cut short when Vegeta's lips latched frantically onto his own, caressing his mouth hungrily. _

_Vegeta was in bliss. It had seemed weeks since he had had the opportunity to feel such pleasure, to revel in such warmth, to lay in strong arms with no fear of punishment or pain. The cold, sterile atmosphere of the room in which they now resided did nothing to quell the passion between their hearts, the growing heat between their bodies. Sighing, he gripped his lover's broad shoulders, licking insistently at Raditz' lower lip when an unexpected spike of ki stole any chance of further pleasure away._

_Pulling back from the kiss, Vegeta shook his head slowly in denial, tears immediately beginning to well up. Gulping, he forced himself to stare down at his guard, mouth opening and closing as he struggled to reveal the truth even he wasn't prepared to believe. Twin tears trailed down both sides of his face._

_Raditz grabbed his forearms gently, a look of confusion blossoming over his features. "What-what's wrong?" he asked, shaking Vegeta lightly. "What is it? Have I hurt you?" The usually rough tone was tinted with concern. The Prince struggled to keep his composure, lashes fluttering on flushed cheeks as he shook his head once more. ~Not Raditz…~, he pleaded silently, far too devastated to be vexed by his own weakness. ~He has taken everything…he can't take Raditz away too…~_

_Suddenly, Vegeta became aware that his body was being shaken and he looked down into his lover's face, staring upon his only source of sanity and comfort for what he knew would be the last time. He memorized every feature of Raditz' visage, the sparkling black eyes, the sharp nose, the soft lips. Vegeta stored the precious sight away, unconsciously clinging to the object of his adoration as he wiped one of the tears away. A telling gasp escaped his lover's open mouth and he shuddered. Raditz knew. He knew what was coming._

_The couple clung to each other for dear life as the door swung open, cold laughter echoing throughout the tiny room._

--

Goku stared up at his Prince, his eyes running over the regal face. He watched Vegeta's bare chest rise and fall, surprised at the outwardly calm demeanor that the other was exhibiting. The tall Saiyan was even more confused, however, by the fact that Vegeta didn't seem to realize he was there. Even if he was indeed in some sort of meditative state, Goku had thought that the Prince would have picked up on his ki signal and snapped out of it.

Unsure whether he should leave or remain in the area, Goku bit his lip indecisively, holding back the urge to crush Vegeta against him and kiss the breath out of that delicious, lithe body. He wanted to make Vegeta forget about the pain, the sadness that was keeping him trapped in this unstable state. His common sense argued that the Prince looked quite stable at the moment, but Goku knew otherwise. There was something holding Vegeta back, something holding his true feelings prisoner, and he wanted-no, _needed_- to find out what it was. Why else had the Prince fallen into his arms the night before? Why else did that look of fear creep into his eyes whenever Goku got too close?

The younger Saiyan sighed with resignation, preparing to leave the area when a sudden spike of ki drew his attention back to the unconscious Prince. Looking back at Vegeta, Goku was shocked to see his eyes open slightly, body uncurling from its previous position. There was no glimmer of recognition in those glossy orbs, no hint of feeling or emotion. Just blank confusion.

Slowly, Vegeta drifted down further towards the burbling river, eyes falling shut once again. A moment later, after Goku had taken a tentative step towards him, the Prince lost all balance and plummeted into the rushing body of water, the flame of black hair swallowed up by the lapping tides.

Goku gasped in surprise, running up to the riverbank and staring down into the blue abyss. Vegeta had done that intentionally, right? The Prince had such legendary control; it was hard to believe that he would fall into a river by accident. Perhaps he planned on coming up for air in a matter of moments…

Seconds ticked by, measured out by Goku's shaky breaths, and Vegeta remained beneath the surface. A sudden strike of fear piercing the larger Saiyan's heart, Goku quickly stripped himself of his clothing and took a final breath, diving into the rushing water.

Spikes of pure cold assaulted his naked skin, the icy liquid washing over his body as his eyes darted about. No sign of his Prince was in sight, however, and Goku quickly pushed himself forward, uneasiness rising in his gut. Vegeta was okay, he told himself. He _had_ to be.

--

An enveloping chill danced over his bare chest, flowing through the black fabric of his billowy pants, tingling his still-aching muscles. The Prince shook violently, all images of Raditz cloaked by an endless infinity of black. He could almost feel Frieza's hands running over his trembling thighs, long nails slashing a gaping hole into the side of his face. Vegeta bit his lip, tasting blood. No…

Head hung in surrender, the Prince allowed himself to float down into nothingness, not knowing where he was and not caring the slightest bit. The pain had subsided, and he could block out any images that came to mind. He could forget about it all and simply fade into the darkness surrounding him. It wouldn't matter to anyone.

Suddenly, and seemingly unprovoked, an image of Kakarrot flashed across his vision, dazzling stars brightening to become his gentle, glowing eyes. A soft smile pulled at luscious lips, taunting, reminding Vegeta that he would never be his chosen. His…mate. The type of companion that the Prince had always dreamed about.

Faded images of his previous lovers drifted before his eyes, first the powerful visage of Raditz, then the perturbed face of Bulma. The pictures appeared stained, antique, unworthy when compared to the brightness of Kakarrot's eyes.

Vegeta inhaled deeply, choking when he felt his head break through.

--

The gentle Saiyan lifted his Prince to the surface, pressing two fingers to the elder's lower jaw. Kami, why was Vegeta always getting hurt? Goku felt incredibly guilty for waiting so long to jump in and save him.

Feeling a pulse, Goku couldn't help but smile at his Prince's will to live. No matter how miserable, how broken he appeared outwardly, he refused to let life go completely, whether the stubbornness was intentional or not. The grin faded as he ran a hand down Vegeta's face, amazed at the softness of his skin. He would make it so Vegeta didn't have to hurt anymore. He promised.

Softly holding the Prince against him, amazed at the beauty he had missed for so many years, Goku felt himself start when Vegeta's eyes snapped open, recognition flashing through them almost immediately. His breath hitched.

--

Vegeta's vision was blurred, only clearing when the Prince blinked repeatedly, droplets of water dripping down his face. His eyes locked onto Kakarrot's face and he gasped in shock, suddenly aware of the muscled arms holding him close. He soon recognized the sensation of water running down his body and froze, feeling the river swish about his clothed waist as a sense of realization hit him. He had been meditating above the creek and must have somehow fallen in.

Now fully conscious of his surroundings, Vegeta gazed back up at Goku's concerned visage, the gentle eyes threatening to undo his carefully maintained control. Doing his best to ignore the somewhat alien feeling of comfort and warmth that seeped into his chilled muscles, the Prince forcibly furrowed his brow, eventually finding his voice.

"Let me go."

Goku, to his surprise, made no movement to obey his command. The younger Saiyan simply stared down at him, one hand sliding up to rest in his hair, a little smile creeping onto the former's lips. Vegeta held back a tremble of both excitement and fear, unable to calm himself. He felt the taunting fingers spread out and shook slightly, anger replacing his desire. How dare Kakarrot lay hands on him without permission?! What made the egocentric bastard believe he could manhandle the Prince like a piece of meat? A warning growl rumbled in the back of his throat as he snarled, bearing his fangs.

"Get...away…"

His voice, however, wasn't as menacing as he had intended. Glaring daggers at his captor, he took a shuddering breath, pushing against the powerful embrace. Kakarrot wasn't going to win. Not this time.

--

Goku blinked in surprise, firmly holding Vegeta against him, preventing him from physically striking. The Prince still squirmed in effort to get away, menacing snarls mixed in with curses filling the atmosphere between them. The gentle Saiyan, however, remained silent, holding Vegeta still. He couldn't allow the Prince to flee again and risk getting hurt further, neither emotionally nor physically. He wanted to make sure that Vegeta knew that he was safe in his presence, that he didn't have to remain so secluded from those close to him. Goku would never lay a violent hand on his Prince outside of battle, and he needed Vegeta to understand that.

--

Quite a few minutes passed before the elder Saiyan stopped thrashing, speech failing him as he slumped against the strong body. Well, this was it. Kakarrot was going to debase him, mock him for his weakness, tear away any hope he had left. He might as well get it over with.

Utterly defeated, Vegeta pulled back and stared up into Goku's eyes, surprised by the concern that glimmered out from the depths of coal black. He found himself gazing into the gentle face, breathing in the intoxicating, earthy scent, trembling slightly at the thought of what could never be. The Prince almost tore his eyes away when he felt a strong hand grasp his chin, holding his head in place.

--

Goku's breath left him at Vegeta's beauty. How could someone so cold be so incredibly gorgeous?

Noticing the look of uncertainty on his Vegeta's face, the younger Saiyan threw him another reassuring smile, inhaling deeply. He would show Vegeta how precious he was, how completely heartbreaking it would be to see him go. Sighing, he bent down slowly and pressed his lips to the Prince's, moving them hesitantly over the latter's mouth.

--

Vegeta's eyes widened in shock. This couldn't be true…he had to be dreaming.

The lips against his own moved hesitantly, comfortingly, heat tingling over the Prince's face. He didn't care if this was a fantasy. Vegeta wasn't going to deny himself any longer.

Wrapping his arms around Goku's upper body, Vegeta licked lightly at the tall Saiyan's lower lip, reveling in the feel of satin skin beneath his fingers. The mouth against his opened slightly, Kakarrot's lips ghosting over his own as he slipped his tongue into the awaiting heat.

Vegeta couldn't suppress the purring moan that escaped his throat as he fisted his hands into velvet locks, gripping the thick hair as he yanked Kakarrot's mouth down to his level, plundering the warm tongue that slid against his own. Yes, this was what he wanted. Warmth, safety, to be held…

--

Goku gasped, eyes lidded when Vegeta licked wantonly at his tongue. The lithe body pressed firmly against his and he breathed in the musky scent, running a hand down to rest on the Prince's bare chest. He felt himself shiver when Vegeta moaned into his mouth. It sounded so…good, that impassioned groan. Goku was shocked by his Prince's hungry, needy gasps, the strong hands that pulled at his hair, the muscled body that pressed so demandingly against his. Vegeta was the embodiment of passion. He was fire.

Sighing, Goku made a movement to pull his Prince closer when he felt the comforting heat leave his body. Unsure whether he was imagining the lack of contact, he opened his eyes slightly when he felt Vegeta's lips leave his, the lithe body no longer against his own, hands no longer in his hair. A splash of water, the sound of someone's voice, and Goku opened his eyes wearily. The Prince was no longer beside him. Before he could fully process what had happened, the short human on shore yelled to him, all peace and tranquility shattering at the whiny shout. "Goku!"

--

-cliffhangs- Please review XP


	5. Ascent

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop **

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there's no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta, swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, WIFE BASHING (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, pretty much anything one can warn about.

Summary: Vegeta's feelings for Goku get the best of him one day, but his pride won't stand for it. Events that follow prove to change him forever. Summary sucks (as always). Just read.

Author's note (changes with chapter): Hrm…not much to say this time. Sorry it took so long to get this chapter posted, I've been lazy -.-; Anyways, please leave a review if you read. Thanks!

_'Text' _- Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

* * *

**Chapter 5: Ascent -**

Goku lifted his shirt from its previous position on the ground, the rushing of the river still in his ears as he slid the orange article over his head.

"So…what were you doing?"

The Saiyan cast an annoyed glance at his oldest friend, gulping quietly as he rapidly thought up an excuse for his and Vegeta's close proximity. "Um, Vegeta and I just went for a swim."

Krillin raised an eyebrow. "Swim? Then why'd he run off so quickly? Were you guys having a fight or something?"

Goku's mouth opened slightly in surprise. His friend was acting as if he hadn't seen what had taken place. Biting his lip, he decided to press his luck. "Uh, no. What-what did you see?"

The shorter of the two widened his eyes in confusion. "I saw Vegeta fly off just as I landed." He paused. "Are you okay? Your ki's been acting up lately."

Sighing in both relief and annoyance at the change of topic, Goku shrugged wearily, his eyes closing momentarily. "Yeah, I'm-I'm okay. Just haven't been…sleeping enough, I guess."

While Krillin still looked mildly skeptical, he nodded back. "Well, okay. I just thought I should come check on you." He cocked his head. "Is there anything I can do?" At the Saiyan's quiet response of "No", he hovered up a few feet into the air. "Are you just gonna stay out here?"

Goku shook his head, pressing two fingers against it. "No. I've gotta go talk to Trunks. See you."

Before the human could inquire as what his friend was intending to do, Goku had disappeared from sight, leaving a very confused Krillin in his wake.

--

"What?! She was having an affair?" The lavender-haired demi widened his eyes, looking up from the stack of paperwork that had previously occupied his attention. "Geez Goku, I'm sorry. When did you leave her?"

The eldest of the three suppressed a sigh, putting an arm around his youngest son. "Earlier today, I guess." He really wasn't much in the mood to talk about everything that had happened.

In the moment of silence that followed, the tall Saiyan looked down at Goten, ruffling a hand through his hair. "I think it might be best if you stayed here at Capsule Corp. for awhile, son." He glanced back down at Trunks. "Would that be okay?"

The older demi nodded his head quickly in affirmation, blue eyes flashing with deep concern. "Of course. You're welcome here for as long as you want, Goten." The teenager in question smiled, wrapping Trunks into a tight embrace. "Thanks!"

Doing his best to keep the attached demi from constricting his airway, Trunks hugged him back gently, attention turning to Goku. "Do you wanna stay here too? There's plenty of room." The tall Saiyan shook his head.

"No thanks. I have a favor to ask, though." He paused for a moment. "Do you think I could borrow one of your capsule houses for awhile? I'd really appreciate it." Trunks brightened, smiling. "Sure. I'll go get a few. Be right back." With that, the elder demi walked quickly out of the room, an excited Goten still clinging to him.

"Did you hear that, Trunks? My Dad's gonna let me stay here! We can hang out all the time now!"

"Like we don't do that anyway. Get off, Goten, you're choking me!"

Goku couldn't help but smile at the happy voices that echoed down the hall, his sensitive hearing picking up every word. He was so glad that his son had a close friend, someone he both could trust and have fun with. Hopefully, Goten's friendship with Trunks would ease any stress that his parents' break-up might cause.

A few minutes passed before Trunks re-entered the room, plopping down on a nearby couch and placing three capsules on the coffee table as Goten ran in after him. "Come on, take your pick." Goku sat himself next to the two boys, his hand creeping up to the back of his head in a gesture of uncertainty. "Gee, I dunno. What's the difference?"

Trunks picked up the largest capsule. "Well, this one's probably the best model. It's not the biggest, but it has a fireplace. The other two are larger, but the rooms are pretty compact. And this one has a really cool kitchen."

Goku widened his eyes. "Wow, you know a lot about them, huh?" The elder demi nodded. "Yeah. I've been helping grandpa run the company ever since mom passed away." His face fell for a moment before brightening again. "So, which one do you want?"

Before the tall Saiyan could verbally convey his choice, Trunks tossed the biggest capsule into his lap, smiling at Goku's questioning glance. "Go ahead, take it. No need to bring it back, either."

Knowing that it was no use arguing with the determined princeling, Goku grinned back gratefully, clutching his new home in a strong hand.

--

The Saiyan Prince quietly slid through the back door of CC, grimacing as the still-soaked pants clung to his legs. He cursed under his breath, hovering silently down the hall to his bedroom, slipping inside and locking the door behind him. Kakarrot was upstairs, probably telling their sons exactly what had transpired between them, laughing stupidly as if it were a joke. Vegeta could still feel the tingling warmth of the third class' lips on his own.

Mentally scolding himself, Vegeta yanked open his closet door, pulling out a shiny grey training uniform. He had to stop this-this…whatever it was before it got any further. He would finish Kakarrot off once and for all, destroy all memory of him and never have to lay eyes on him again. The Prince angrily ripped away the wet pants, shredding them to ribbons.

Once dressed, Vegeta exited Capsule Corp. and took off to wait for his soon-to-be prey, ignoring the surprisingly large part of him that longed for Kakarrot's touch.

--

Glancing out a nearby window, Goku quickly finished off his last bowl of rice, grinning at both teenagers as he stood from his position at the table. "Thanks for the dinner, Trunks. I needed that."

The elder demi smiled back, stuffing the used plates into the dishwasher. "No problem. Hey, I've been meaning to ask you something." He turned. "You haven't seen my father around lately, have you? I know I called you earlier, but-" "It's okay, Trunks." Goku cut him off. "I'll make sure he's all right, okay?"

At Trunks' nod, the eldest Saiyan turned and made his way to the nearest exit, giving a final thumbs up to the two boys. "Talk to you later." Smiling, Goku swung open the door and hovered out into the cool evening air, still grasping the capsule as he flew over the mass of trees.

--

_'This looks like a good place'_ he pondered, pressing down firmly on the object and tossing it out in front of him. He watched the cloud of purple smoke materialize, only to see it blown away by the biting night winds that whipped through his loose clothing. Goku shivered detachedly as he observed the surprisingly large house, smiling at the knowledge that he could sleep peacefully without the fear that his wife would come bursting in.

Sighing, he let his thoughts travel back to Vegeta, fingers ghosting over his lips. The Prince had seemed so…hungry for contact. Almost _needy_. Goku trembled slightly at the memory of Vegeta's hands tugging insistently at his hair, the warm mouth plundering his own. He felt incredibly guilty for letting his Prince go when he obviously needed help.

Slowly strolling up to the door of his new house, Goku froze when a sharp spike of ki caught his attention, drawing his eyes up to the darkening sky. The object of his concern hovered less than ten feet away, the narrowed eyes and crossed arms stealing any intelligent thought from the tall Saiyan. Eventually, Goku found his voice.

"V-Vegeta?"

--

The Prince's form remained unmoving as he hovered down to Goku's level, staring up into the younger's eyes. The bastard would pay with his life for what he had done. Vegeta was no weakling to be pitied, no whore to be kissed and then forgotten. He would make sure that Kakarrot never touched him again.

Bearing his fangs, Vegeta growled deep in his throat, watching as Goku's eyes widened immensely. The dumb baka had no idea what was coming his way. Without warning, the Prince swung a gloved fist into the younger's jaw, sending him flying backwards into a nearby tree. Kakarrot slammed against the trunk, yelping in surprise and pain as leaves floated down upon him. However, he was quick to jump to his feet, brow furrowed.

"What was that for?" Goku yelled, a large hand gripping the side of his face as he stared at the fuming Prince. Vegeta hovered back up into the air, glaring daggers. "You will fight with me, Kakarrot." he snarled, fists clenched out in front of him as he watched Goku fly up to his level. '_You will die tonight, Kakarrot.'_

--

Goku frowned slightly, pain thrumming through his head. Vegeta wanted to fight? Why? How could the Prince be so needy and affectionate one moment and so angry and violent the next?

He stared back into Vegeta's eyes, watching as they faded from their usual ebony to deep green, the Prince's hair lightening to a golden yellow. Goku gulped, watching Vegeta's gleaming aura rush about him. The Prince was definitely serious about something.

Praying that Vegeta only desired a friendly spar, Goku powered up to match him, their twin auras sparkling in the dark of night. The younger Saiyan took a deep breath, cold air drifting through his lungs as his Prince took an unexpected lunge towards him, a bright blast of ki flying towards his face. Without thinking, Goku swung his arm out and smacked the ball of energy back at its creator, watching with a stab of regret as it skimmed Vegeta's shoulder, the small explosion sending sparks and smoke flying about. The Prince simply glared back as if unaffected, blood trickling down his arm.

"That's more like it." he snarled, face livid. "Fight back, damn you!"

Goku had no time to react when Vegeta sprung once more, slamming a muscled leg into his ribs.

--

Vegeta threw blow after blow, screaming with hatred, tearing at every inch of Goku he could get his hands on. To both his surprise and relief, Kakarrot fought back, though he seemed more interested in blocking the blows than actually launching any type of attack. Something within him knew he would simply be unable to kill the third-class if he didn't put up some sort of defense.

The Prince snarled, adrenaline coursing through his veins as he powered up to Super Saiyan 2, sparks of electricity dancing across his vision. Once again, it was as if he was on a planet purging mission for Frieza, his goal to terminate the life of anyone who got in his way. The desire to smell the scent of blood and hear the crunch of bones overwhelmed all intelligent thought. He was a killing machine.

--

Goku deflected every punch and kick he could, throwing many of Vegeta's attacks back at him in an attempt to hold him off. Kami, why was he doing this? What was making the Prince so angry? The hateful gleam in Vegeta's eyes reminded him of the Prince's first day on Earth.

Blocking yet another vicious kick towards his chest, Goku heaved a labored sigh. He wanted to hold Vegeta in his arms, to crush him against his chest and let him calm down, to run a hand through his upswept flame of ebony hair and comfort him in any way he could. It was heartwrenching that the Prince didn't seem to want anything to do with him.

It took a few seconds before Goku realized that no more punches were coming his way, no more angry blows. Blinking in confusion, the tall Saiyan gazed back at Vegeta, lips parting at the look on the shorter's visage. Vegeta was crying.

--

The Prince of all Saiyans shook violently, unable to stop the tears that ran down his face. This was Kakarrot, the man that had held him close, that had kissed him with such concern and passion. Even if it had indeed been an illusion, an event that had never taken place, Vegeta didn't care. He couldn't kill the one thing he had wanted for as long as he could remember.

Sobbing uncontrollably, the Prince threw his head back, unaware of all that surrounded him, of the night sky, of Kakarrot. Ki rushed threw his straining muscles, energy flowing through his veins as a mass of golden power enveloped him, blocking out all sight and sound. Vegeta screamed his pain to the heavens he knew he would never reach, eyes squinted shut.

--

Goku watched in awe as sparks of energy rushed about his Prince, the ki signal skyrocketing. What was happening? Vegeta had never come close to _this_ level of power before. It was overwhelming, the amount of ki that flowed off from him.

The younger Saiyan's breath left him at Vegeta's shriek of pain, his eyes widening as his Prince's ki began to plummet. His body couldn't possibly withstand the power...he was going to die…

His worst fears became reality when Vegeta's eyes opened slightly, his Prince extending a gloved hand towards him in a gesture of desperation. There was nothing Goku could do. It was over.

A final blast of golden power, and the tall Saiyan lost all sight of his Prince's body, smoke stinging his squinted eyes as the ki disappeared completely. He trembled as the cool night winds blew traces of ash onto his clothing, his wonderful, beautiful Prince reduced to dust.

Goku bit back a sob, raising two fingers to his forehead.

* * *

Ooh man, I don't think I've ever written anything so grim. -wipes sweat from brow- Phew. Anyways, please read the next chapter to find out where Goku ends up going. -smiles-


	6. Memories

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop **

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there's no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, WIFE BASHING (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, pretty much anything one can warn about.

Summary: Vegeta's feelings for Goku get the best of him one day, but his pride won't stand for it. Events that follow prove to change him forever. Summary sucks (as always). Just read.

Author's note (changes with chapter): Yee, I'm so happy all you people are reviewing! -claps- I had a LOT of fun writing this chapter (it cheered me up, I hope it does the same for you). Please enjoy XD

'_Text' _- Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

* * *

**Chapter 6: Memories -**

Goku reappeared in front of the check-in station's enormous desk, his lips parting with relief and excitement. _'It worked!' _Grinning, he waved a hand merrily at the being before him. "Hi there, King Yemma!"

The oni gasped at the greeting, his expression going from surprised to perturbed in a matter of moments. "Goku! What's going on? You can't just transport yourself between dimensions like that! You could screw up every dimension in creation!"

The Saiyan grinned sheepishly, hovering up to stand on the King's work station. "Sorry, but I really needed to get here." His expression turned serious. "Do you think I could take a quick trip down to Hell?"

Yemma raised an eyebrow in confusion. "Hell? What exactly are you planning to do down there, Goku?"

"I just…it's complicated." A pause. "But can I go? I won't cause any trouble."

The giant sighed in resignation, turning his attention back to a nearby stack of files. "Oh, all right. Just make sure you tell me what this was about later, okay?" Only silence met his ears. "Goku?"

The gentle Saiyan had already reappeared 30 miles below the station.

--

The Prince of all Saiyans launched another vicious punch to his enemy's face, grunting as the four-eyed alien wobbled away in surrender, leaving a trail of viridian blood behind. Hardly a moment passed before a second being rushed towards him, swinging a gloved fist at Vegeta's head. "This'll teach you to mess with the Ginyu Force, ya damn Saiyan trash!"

His expression never once changing, Vegeta easily dodged the blow and sent the white-haired warrior flying, eyes closing momentarily as the silence descended upon him. He hadn't been at all surprised that he had come into contact with some enemies from his past; if anything, he had thought that more rivals would have come out of the woodwork to challenge him. Perhaps his reputation as one of the universe's greatest warriors had managed to keep the weaker of his adversaries away.

Vegeta sighed, wiping a smudge of crimson blood from the side of his face. The few fighters that had come forward to challenge him hadn't been difficult to fight off, but he was still relatively injured from his earlier battle with Kakarrot. Apparently those who were sent to Hell after death weren't given any time to heal before they were dropped at their final resting place.

'_Kakarrot.'_ He would never see the brawny warrior again, of that Vegeta was sure. Never. Kakarrot would continue as he always had on Earth, and spend his life after death up in heaven where he most definitely belonged. The Prince deserved every ounce of pain that thrummed through his sore body. He had been a fool to believe, even for a moment, that Kakarrot might save him from his inevitable fate.

Vegeta didn't remember much about his death, save for the final sight of Goku's face. Those dark eyes…they were so much like Raditz', but somehow different. Warmer, he decided. His body shivered at the thought.

The Prince only froze further at the high chuckle that sounded out before him, eyes widening at the figure that hovered less than ten feet away.

"So, my pet. You've finally come back for more, haven't you?"

--

The tall Saiyan hovered through the lifeless area, observing his surroundings with interest and concern. There didn't seem to be anyone about, and Vegeta's ki still seemed to be relatively far away. He sighed. Even when he did manage to find his Prince, he had no doubt that the latter would scorn him, refuse any help that he offered. Goku's eyes stung with impending tears. It wasn't fair. He wanted to help.

Suddenly, Vegeta's energy signal flared in his head, drawing his attention back to the land around him. Wherever the Prince was, he had to get him out of here. Goku needed to let Vegeta know how he felt, to tell him some things about his death that he wasn't sure his Prince knew himself. Once he was sure that Vegeta understood the extent of his feelings, he would do as the elder asked. He would leave Vegeta alone for eternity, if he wished. It might drive him mad, but Goku would respect his Prince's wishes. He just wasn't sure how he would fare if Vegeta pushed him away forever.

--

Thin, black lips curved into a smirk, their owner's eyes glinting red. "Well? Aren't you going to answer, my little monkey Prince?"

Vegeta could only stare at the tyrant, tail curled defensively about his waist, teeth gritted. This couldn't be happening. It wasn't enough that Frieza inhabited his nightmares? The bastard had to haunt him in death as well? His tail twitched at the memories of pain long passed, yet never forgotten.

"Y-you." The Prince hardly recognized his own voice. He wanted to scream, to cry, to pound the white lizard into a bloody pulp, but his body refused to cooperate with the wishes of his mind. All he could do was watch when Frieza hovered forwards, halting only when he was less than a foot away.

"Yes, Vegeta, it is I." The changeling sneered. "Even a pathetic Saiyan monkey like yourself should be able to remember your Master." Frieza slowly extended a pale hand, fingertips brushing Vegeta's cheek as he cupped the Prince's chin.

Vegeta couldn't move. He couldn't pull away from the cold hand against his face, couldn't beat the life out of the monster that had made his life a living hell for as long as he could remember. The Prince could only look back into those cold, crimson eyes, anticipating abuse yet unable to guard against it.

Only when sharp, black fingernails slashed through the flesh of his cheek did Vegeta drift back to reality. Biting back a yell, the Prince clenched strong fingers into a fist and rammed his hand into Frieza's solarplexis, the sound of crunching bones echoing in his ears. Vision red, Vegeta powered up to Super Saiyan, golden power rushing through his veins as he delivered blow after blow. Maroon blood splattered over his torn garments. The tyrant's cries for mercy were lost in the sounds of sizzling flesh and screams of rage.

A final yell, and Frieza was reduced to a cloud of dark smoke, the stench of blood thick in the surrounding air. Vegeta bit his lip, staggering backwards as he held his injured arm. Frieza wasn't gone. He might be extinguished for the time being, but since he had never been alive in the first place, the tyrant would return eventually, body and all. The Prince hung his head in defeat.

A smooth hand slid into his own and he gasped, eyes snapping open.

--

Goku looked down at the battered Prince, gently grasping the gloved hand in his own. He had to be cautious; there was no way of knowing how Vegeta would react to his presence. Sighing, he tried to find his voice.

"Th-that was great, Vegeta."

The Prince simply stared back as if in shock, confusion flashing in his angular eyes. Realizing that Vegeta didn't seem to understand what he meant, Goku considered explaining further when he noticed the numerous wounds, the way Vegeta cradled his right elbow. He shook his head slightly, cursing his stupidity. Vegeta needed help, not praise.

Blinking, Goku stared into his Prince's deep black eyes, softly placing a hand at the small of Vegeta's back in an attempt to support him. He gulped. "I-I'm going to get you some help, okay?" A glimmer of recognition sparkled in the Prince's glossy orbs before Vegeta fell forward, collapsing into Goku's chest. The tall Saiyan nearly started in surprise before he noticed the steadiness of Vegeta's breaths, his closed eyes, his relaxed muscles. Absently running a soothing hand through the elder's hair, Goku pressed two fingers to his forehead, gazing thoughtfully at the halo above his Prince's head.

--

Goku couldn't help but smile, a sense of extreme relief flooding through his body as he held Vegeta against him. After a bit of convincing, King Yemma had finally agreed that it would be better for his Prince to reside on Snake Way. It wasn't quite as nice as Heaven, but Vegeta wouldn't have to guard himself against attackers while he healed, and (as Goku had learned relatively early in life) it definitely wasn't the worst place to be.

Hovering slowly above the fluffy, golden clouds, the tall Saiyan stared up at the darkening pink sky, gazing at the numerous moons that seemed to float in the still air. Goku brightened when his eyes fell upon the tiny planet that was his destination and he increased his speed, holding the Prince tightly against him. "You'll be okay, Vegeta." he whispered, knowing full well that Vegeta was still unconscious yet unable to hold the words back. "You're safe."

--

"I wish you had come earlier, Goku. Vegeta seems to be in pretty bad shape."

Goku nodded in agreement, unable to keep his eyes off his still-sleeping Prince. "Yeah, but I had to convince King Yemma to let me take him up here. He was down in Hell before."

The blue deity nodded, sunglasses glinting in the moonlight. "I see. Well Goku, I was actually planning to leave home today. There's a tournament going on tomorrow up in heaven that I'd like to see, but you're welcome to stay for a while. Just don't forget to feed Bubbles while I'm gone."

The Saiyan nodded, smiling with gratitude. "Thanks King Kai, I owe you one."

Whiskers bobbing, the Kai grinned back at his quadrant's greatest warrior, flickering out of sight. "See you later!"

No sooner had his old teacher vanished than Goku was at his Prince's side, affectionately brushing his knuckles against the royal temple. Vegeta was propped up against a tree (there had been no time to get his Prince into a bed before the North Kai had sensed Goku's presence and come waddling out of his little house) and still appeared to be unconscious, though his occasional movements led Goku to believe that he could wake up at any moment.

Glancing once more at the object of his worry, Goku ran quickly into the small house, returning minutes later with a roll of gauze and bowl of hot water. He wanted Vegeta to be free of pain before he told the Prince about his feelings. It didn't seem fair nor right for Goku to focus on his own concerns and desires when Vegeta was in such a state.

Kneeling beside the older Saiyan, Goku tore off a strip of gauze and dipped it into the steaming liquid, gently wrapping it around Vegeta's swollen ankle. He carefully wiped the remaining blood from his Prince's beaten muscles, marveling at the texture of his satin skin, unintentionally caressing the limp body. Softly shifting Vegeta towards him in an effort to clean his Prince's back, Goku cautiously tore away the remainders of the grey shirt, raising the red-stained washcloth and running it over Vegeta's bruised flesh. He bit his lip, surveying the damage. How could his Prince endure this type of pain? Goku never ceased to be amazed at Vegeta's determination.

Wiping away the last streaks of blood, Goku gasped in surprise when he felt Vegeta shift in his loose grip, the Prince's eyes fluttering open.

--

Vegeta groaned in pain as his surroundings came into view, eyes focusing to the dim light. Where was he? Where was Frieza? What was that wonderful warm feeling that seeped into his aching muscles?

Instinctively biting back another moan, the Prince turned his head to the side, eyes widening immensely as he realized that Kakarrot's face was inches away. His lips parted in confusion. Had the third-class somehow managed to get him out of Hell? The surrounding air was surprisingly peaceful and quiet.

Goku's smile halted all intelligent thoughts in their tracks. The younger Saiyan simply stared down at him, a reassuring grin on his lush lips. Vegeta stared longingly at his follower's soft features, absently running a hand down Kakarrot's chest, delighting in the gasp his action elicited from the tall warrior. Taking full advantage of Goku's open mouth, Vegeta attacked the lips that taunted him, gripping the broad shoulders.

Only a few seconds passed before Kakarrot responded, kissing back with just as much fervor, licking at his Prince's tongue hungrily. Vegeta couldn't hold back the moan of passion he released into Goku's mouth, reveling in the younger Saiyan's body heat, nipping at the plump lower lip before pulling away. Oh, he didn't care anymore. Kakarrot's warmth was all that mattered.

--

Goku stared back at his Prince in shock. Had Vegeta really just…_kissed_ him? His lips tingled at the thought. It seemed simply impossible.

He nearly jumped at the sound of Vegeta's voice.

"Wh-where are we?"

Goku put a comforting arm around his Prince, and was rather surprised when he made no move to shy away from the contact. "We're on King Kai's planet, at the end of Snake Way." He smiled. "You're not in Hell anymore."

He felt rather than heard Vegeta sigh. Turning further to the side, Goku stared his Prince in the eye, rendered speechless by Vegeta's beauty. His bronze skin shone in the moonlight, dark eyes sparkling like the stars above. Lithe yet powerful muscles glowed, the ripped clothing doing nothing to mar the perfection of his lean body. Goku couldn't help but stare. His Prince looked every bit the warrior he was born to be.

Gulping, he carefully slipped behind Vegeta, leaning back against the tree trunk. Placing his hands on the Prince's shoulders, Goku slowly kneaded the sore muscles, strong fingers pushing away the dull aches.

--

Vegeta threw his head back onto Goku's shoulder, breathing heavily as comforting pressure rubbed away the agony, pleasure flowing through his abused body. Kakarrot continued his ministrations, kneading Vegeta's back even harder, causing a low moan to escape the Prince's throat.

The elder Saiyan was unable to swallow the contented sounds he produced, placing a shaking hand on Kakarrot's knee, pressing back against the warm body. His tail fluffed out, curling around Goku's flexing wrist, encouraging its actions. A satisfied purr thrummed through Vegeta's chest as he gazed up at the closest moon. GodS, how he wanted the younger Saiyan…

The Prince moaned when Goku's hands ran softly over his abdomen, a growl building in his throat as he turned in the strong arms, muscles protesting as he straddled the taller's hips. He rubbed sensually against the taut body, clinging frantically to powerful shoulders. Vegeta nearly gasped in surprise when Kakarrot's hands gripped his wrists gently, pulling him away.

--

Goku looked back at his Prince, startled by his actions, wishing more than anything he could give Vegeta what he obviously desired. Sighing, he shook his head slowly, blinking with regret.

"Vegeta, we-we can't." He paused. "You're hurt. You need to-to rest."

The Prince's broken expression was all he saw before the comforting warmth left his body, a gloved hand ruthlessly smacking the side of his face.

* * *

-grins-


	7. Stars

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop **

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, WIFE BASHING (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, angst, pretty much anything one can warn about.

Summary: Vegeta's feelings for Goku get the best of him one day, but his pride won't stand for it. Events that follow prove to change him forever. Summary sucks (as always). Just read.

Author's note (changes with chapter): More fluff XD This chapter is pretty sweet, I think. Oh, and it was inspired by (but has nothing to do with) Dante Alighieri's _Dante's Inferno_. -is a nerd-

'_Text' _- Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

* * *

**Chapter 7: Stars - **

Vegeta stood before the taller Saiyan, his fist clenched defensively in front of him, teeth gritted with rage. That-that bastard! How dare Kakarrot push him away after teasing him to the point of no return?! The third-class baka had no right to taunt him in this way!

Snarling, the Prince glared down at his tormentor, watching with disgust as innocent eyes widened. If the deceptive scumbag actually believed he could toy with him and get away with it, he was sadly mistaken. No one touched the Saiyan Prince with such intent and then refused contact; he was no one's whore!

Blood pounding in Vegeta's ears, he watched Goku slowly raise himself to his full height, the latter's brows knit with concern. " What…Are you okay?"

Vegeta growled, forcing the choked words from his throat. "Do-Do I look okay, you taunting freak?!" He took a step forward, seething. "Do you think you can just-just…_tease_ me, Kakarrot? Throw me away like a common whore? Is that what you think?!" He spat at Goku's feet, crossing his arms indignantly.

--

Goku's mouth dropped in horror. How could Vegeta believe that he thought of him as a…_whore_? The tall Saiyan shook his head, face still stinging from his Prince's assault. "Of course not, Vegeta!"

Said Saiyan took a quick step forward, eyes narrowing further. "Liar! Two-faced worthless waste of Saiyan blood! How dare you lead me to believe that you c-care, and then discard me at your will?! I am not-" Goku moved towards his Prince, laying a firm hand on his bare shoulder. Vegeta halted in his tirade and simply glared, bearing his fangs as if waiting for an attack. Sighing, Goku stared down into his eyes.  
"Vegeta, I-I do care." He tightened his grip. "I just don't want you to hurt yourself. It's not that I don't-don't _want_ you."

--

The smaller Saiyan began to shake uncontrollably, rage doused by the sincerity in Goku's sparkling eyes, unable to move. Kakarrot _wanted_ him? Oh GodS, it was too incredible to imagine. No one had ever touched him so intimately without expecting some sort of _favor_ in return. Well, no one except for Raditz. Vegeta felt his eyes begin to leak, a memory sweeping through his mind.

--

"_Don't touch me!" _

_Vegeta tore from Raditz' grip, growling menacingly when the guard stopped in his tracks. "You promised me, Raditz! How dare you refuse me! Don't you understand that we might never have the chance again?!"_

_The bulky Saiyan blinked, sighing. "Do I understand? I understand that Frieza's come back a day earlier than planned, Vegeta! Don't YOU understand what will happen if he catches us?"_

_Raditz took a deep breath, pulling his Prince close, running a strong hand over Vegeta's naked chest. "Come now, Ouji-sama. There will be time; I will make sure of it. I promise."_

_Vegeta relaxed into the warm embrace, putting his trust completely in the larger warrior, nuzzling the broad chest. He began to purr as his tail was gently stroked, sleep overtaking any intelligent thought. There would be time…_

--

Goku watched worriedly as his Prince trembled, fighting the urge to run his hand through Vegeta's hair. He felt his lips part at the elder's next statement. "_He promised._" The words were choked with sadness.

Goku had no idea how to react. Part of him wanted to respect Vegeta's space, to give him time to compose himself, and therefore reduce the chance of them both getting hurt again. However, Goku's heart insisted that he do just the opposite, and its owner was simply unable to heed the warnings of his mind. Taking a slow step forward, Goku wrapped his arms around the lithe Prince and held him close, burying his face in ebony locks.

To the tall Saiyan's surprise, Vegeta showed no interest in escaping his grasp. The Prince simply lay limp in the tight embrace, gloved hands gripping his blue shirt tightly. Vegeta pulled the garment lower, exposing his savior's muscled chest, and rested his head tiredly against the bare flesh, eyes fluttering shut. Goku gaped at the open display of trust. It was impossible for him to believe that this was the same man that had threatened to end his life more times than he could remember.

The whole scenario seemed…

--

_Too good to be true_, Vegeta mused, pressing his cheek more firmly against the warm satin of Goku's skin. This was an illusion, it simply had to be. The years of hatred and denial had finally taken a toll on his mind. Never before had he felt such a sense of comfort, of…safety. It was as if Kakarrot's arms were the only things keeping him from falling into a pit of darkness and despair.

Long minutes passed before the Prince could find the strength to pull gently from the protective embrace, laying down on the cool grass below, gazing up at the stars as the soft blades tickled his aching back. He heard rather than saw Goku plop down beside him, wincing when a strong hand slipped into his hair. Vegeta sighed, turning his head to stare the tall Saiyan in the eye.

"Kakarrot…how did I die?" he asked, biting back the urge to break his gaze. Goku's eyes were so deep, so sincere. It almost hurt to look.

The younger Saiyan blinked slowly, gently stroking Vegeta's hair. Kakarrot's breath hitched. "You-you went Super Saiyan Three, Vegeta."

The Prince's mouth dropped open, its owner gasping in shock. Goku continued, never once stopping his gentle touching of Vegeta's head. "Yeah, your body couldn't take all that power. I-I saw you just before you disappeared. You were beautiful."

--

He sighed, too tired to believe that all this could be happening. Super Saiyan Three, the level he had waited years to gain, was finally in his grasp. Vegeta frowned. It was all so…unfulfilling. Sure, he had reached the pinnacle of Saiyan power, but what did it matter?

The Prince started when Goku reached out towards him, placing a hand on his chest. "Vegeta…what's wrong?" The gentle voice met his ears. "You're as strong as I am now, Vegeta."

Vegeta shook his head, unable to hold his words back. "I don't care, Kakarrot." He sighed. "It-it doesn't matter."

The tall Saiyan cocked his head, an expression of worry apparent on the handsome face. "You…don't?"

Vegeta had no time to respond in any way before he was wrapped in a tight hug, Kakarrot's arms crushing him against the larger body. "Oh, Vegeta! What's happened to you?" Goku's voice was high and shaky. "Did something happen? Are you mad? Please don't be mad, Vegeta!"

--

Goku held Vegeta as tight as the Prince would let him, burying his face into the flame of velvet hair. How could Vegeta be so blasé about the increase in power? Where was the fiery, competitive Prince he had come to love? Something was terribly wrong. Vegeta's confidence had simply disappeared, and it seemed nothing had replaced it.

Feeling the lithe body struggle in his arms, Goku gently loosened his hold and allowed Vegeta to move away, eyes still locked with the Prince's. What had happened to the prideful warrior Vegeta had been just a few hours before? How had he changed so much so quickly?

Suddenly, the tall Saiyan became aware of a sudden movement to his left and turned, smiling detachedly when he saw Vegeta's tail swishing about in the night air. A sharp intake of air parted his lips when the sable appendage floated towards him, gently curling around his arm. He blinked in disbelief. Vegeta was being so…_affectionate_.

Sighing happily despite himself at the action, Goku looked confusedly into his Prince's eyes. "How did you get your tail back?"

Vegeta shrugged. "I-I'm not sure. I think the moonlight hit my back while I was sleeping." A pause. "Why?"

Goku bit his lip. "I…like it."

A shadow of a smile crept onto the Prince's face before Vegeta rolled over onto his back, eyes drifting shut. "Go to sleep, Kakarrot."

Goku found himself grinning like a madman as he drifted off to sleep, gazing up at the stars.

--

The gentle Saiyan pressed his palm against King Kai's back, an image of his eldest son floating about in his mind. "Gohan, can you hear me? It's Dad." A gasp of response echoed in his ears. "Dad! What's going on?! I felt Vegeta's ki disappear! Are you guys okay?"

Goku sighed, glancing over at his sleeping Prince. "Yeah, Vegeta went Super Saiyan Three last night and burnt himself up. I-I went to Otherworld and got him out of Hell."

Gohan sounded confused. "Um, okay. But aren't you gonna come back to Earth and wish him back? You didn't die too, right?" "Nope, I'm fine." He took a breath. "Gohan, do you think you could gather the dragon balls for me? I need-I want to stay here with Vegeta for awhile. He's in bad shape."

A pause. "Well, sure Dad, I guess." Goku smiled with gratitude. "Thanks. I already have four balls at home, if that helps." Seconds passed before Gohan spoke again. "Dad, did something bad happen with you and Mom? Goten told me you…moved out."

Goku almost smacked himself on the forehead. How could he have forgotten to tell Gohan? He hastened to explain. "Well, I…our relationship wasn't working out, son. I thought it would be best for us to-to go our separate ways." A sharp tinge of regret pierced his heart.

To his surprise, Gohan didn't sound all that shocked. "Oh. Wow, Dad, I'm sorry. Do you have a place to go? I'm sure Trunks would let you stay at Capsule Corp." "Don't worry about me, I've got a house." Goku tried to smile. "Anyway, I think I should go. Thanks for gathering the balls for me, Gohan. Just wish Vegeta back to life whenever you get them all, okay? We'll be there before you know it."

Eyes closing at his son's parting words, the tall Saiyan retrieved his hand, watching as the blue god turned to look at him. "Couldn't you have kept that conversation shorter? I'm missing the tournament, you know!"

Goku chuckled sheepishly. "Sorry, King Kai. Thanks for coming back to help me with this, though. I really appreciate it."

The Kai nodded, glasses shining in the sun, before disappearing once more. Blinking tiredly, the Saiyan turned to his left, eyes widening when he saw Vegeta standing before him. "You're up."

The Prince simply looked at him, a glint of confusion in the dark eyes. He didn't seem angry, the way Goku had expected, but merely…intrigued.

Smiling, Goku pointed towards Snake Way, extending a hand. "Gohan's collecting the dragon balls to wish you back. We can get going, if you want. He'll probably have them all by the time we get to the check-in station."

Vegeta raised an eyebrow. "Why can't you just use that technique of yours to bring us there?"

Goku scratched the back of his head, thinking. "Well, I guess I could if you want." A smile tugged at his lips. "But I kind of like flying on Snake Way. It brings back memories."

The Prince stared down at the ground, ignoring the hand that Goku offered. "Whatever."

--

Vegeta hovered alongside the tall Saiyan, staring down at the masses of golden clouds, taking care to avoid Goku's gaze. Kami, had the night before been real? How did Kakarrot expect him to act from now on? Were they to-to _live_ together? To treat each other as companions? Something more? His mind spun with questions.

He wasn't sure how he could deal with any change in their rivalry, but oh, Kakarrot was so warm, so strong. While Vegeta didn't understand how anyone so glorious could show any interest in a sorry weakling like himself, he knew somewhere in his overworked mind that he couldn't bear to let Goku go.

Sighing, he flinched when Kakarrot's hand slipped into his, almost pulling away. Apparently having noticed the tiny recoil, the gentle Saiyan addressed him. "Are-are you okay?"

Before Vegeta could even begin to think of how he felt about the action, Goku quickly removed the offending hand. "Sorry."

The Prince shook his head detachedly. He wanted Kakarrot's attention, his touch, but these _gestures _were alien to him. Never before had anyone attempted to please him in such gentle ways. He never ceased to be amazed at Kakarrot's strong, yet yielding nature.

Vegeta had no time to verbally convey his conflicted feelings before he heard Goku gasp. "Your halo's gone!" Taking a quick glance up above him, the Prince observed the empty air with indifference. He wasn't even sure that he wanted to live anymore.

--

Goku watched his Prince with concern. Vegeta looked so _tired_ of being, of living. The lack of fire in his gaze caused Goku's lips to part. GodS, when had Vegeta become so-so dispassionate? This wasn't the fiery Prince he had grown to adore. It took all his willpower to keep himself from tackling Vegeta and kissing him with as much passion as he felt.

He looked down at his rejected hand, tears threatening to well up. Vegeta's words danced through his memory, sending shots of pain into his heart. '_Do you think you can just-just…tease me, Kakarrot? Throw me away like a common whore? Is that what you think?!' _Goku flinched visibly. How could such a powerful, regal, beautiful Prince believe he would regard him that way? What was Vegeta hiding from him?

High, giggling voices turned his attention back to his surroundings. Looking around, Goku saw the palace of Princess Snake. Two blue-skinned servant girls hopped excitedly on the balcony, waving frantically at him, squealing. "Goku! Hi!" "Please come visit us again sometime! We'd love to have you!"

Smiling at the memories, the tall Saiyan waved back in greeting as he passed them, eyes widening at Vegeta's growl. "My, Kakarrot. You're popular around here." The Prince scoffed.

Goku blinked in surprise at the statement. Though he didn't know why, Vegeta's words had a smile pulling at his lips.

--

Vegeta followed Goku into the check-in station, watching as the other gave a departing smile at King Yemma. "We're here, Vegeta. You ready?" The tall Saiyan raised two fingers to his forehead.

Nodding, the Prince put a tentative hand on Goku's shoulder, suppressing the urge to run his fingers along the satin skin. The unfamiliar feeling of Instant Transmission closed in on him and he instinctively clung to the brawny warrior, cheeks heating with embarrassment as his surroundings dissolved into nothingness. A few seconds later he became aware that he was standing on Dende's Lookout, five people surrounding him.

"Dad!" Trunks was the first to step forward, running up to meet his father, hugging him tightly. "Are you okay? You look hurt." Vegeta put a reassuring hand on his son's shoulder, pulling away. "It's-I'm all right. Don't worry." The Prince hardly had time to escape from Trunks' grasp before he was embraced again, this time by a dark-haired demi Saiyan.

"Hi, Mr. Vegeta!" Goten stared up at him, a grin identical to his father's plastered over his face. "Did you really turn Super Saiyan Three? That's awesome!" Disconcerted by all the attention, Vegeta nodded in affirmation and slipped out of the teenager's grasp, brows rising in surprise. "My my, Vegeta." He heard Goku chuckle from behind him. "You're popular around here."

A roll of eyes was Goku's only response.

* * *

Yay, another chapter! The next one'll be pretty entertaining, so stay tuned. Please R&R. -smiles- Thanks.


	8. Nightmares

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop **

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, WIFE BASHING (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, angst, pretty much anything one can warn about.

Summary: Vegeta's feelings for Goku get the best of him one day, but his pride won't stand for it. Events that follow prove to change him forever. Summary sucks (as always). Just read.

Author's note (changes with chapter): Heh, now that I've exhausted most possibilities for severe sap, here comes the ANGST!! Dun, dun, dun. Get ready for violence, bad dreams, and all sorts of depressing stuff. -grins- I'm a bit sick, aren't I?

'_Text' _- Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

* * *

**Chapter 8: Nightmares-**

Goku hovered up alongside his Prince, giving a final departing wave to the crowd of people on the Lookout below. Biting his lip, he stared over at Vegeta, watching the royal visage with concern. The tall Saiyan gulped. "So…are you gonna go back to Capsule Corp?"

The Prince nodded back, eyes downcast, seemingly avoiding Goku's gaze. Kami, if only Vegeta knew how beautiful he was…

"You-You know you can always come over to my place." Goku's stomach clenched with nervousness. "I mean-I have a new house now. No Chichi. You could come stay anytime if-if you wanted." His heart ached. Oh, he didn't want to say goodbye. He didn't want to forget about everything they had already started.

To his surprise, Vegeta didn't seem neither offended by his offer nor interested about the fact that Goku no longer lived with his wife. The shorter Saiyan simply nodded once more, glossy black orbs moving up to meet his own, fists clenched. Sighing, Goku reached out slowly, gripping the Prince's hand in his, coaxing gloved fingers out to thread with his own. "You're al-always welcome, Vegeta."

Before the lithe Prince could react, Goku gently raised the hand in his grasp and placed a loving kiss on Vegeta's palm, wishing his lips could feel the hot skin beneath the cold, leathery material. The latter raised his head, eyes widening, the sudden movement causing Goku to release his hand. Conflicted emotions flashing through Vegeta's eyes much too quickly for the tall Saiyan to discern, the Prince slowly backed away, turning in midair and zooming off in the opposite direction.

Goku hung his head, tears streaming down his face.

--

_Icy cold claws tore the skin on his back to shreds, yanked his tail mercilessly, speared his shoulders. He cried out in pure agony, writhing in the tyrants grasp, yelping as his Master's freezing breath tickled the flesh of his ear. "So, is this all the fight I get, Vegeta?" A clammy tongue licked daintily at his exposed neck, eliciting a shudder from his beaten body. "I see. Why do you struggle no more, my little monkey Prince? I do enjoy hearing you scream." A scaly tail slipped between his throbbing thighs, its tip slashing his lower back. "Well, this will fix that, won't it?" Vegeta screamed…_

--

…and sat up shakily in bed, bare chest heaving, eyes wide. He sighed in both relief and fright, tail curling instinctively around his waist. Shit. That was the third time this week that that godsdamned bastard had managed to haunt his dreams. Vegeta would have been disgusted by his own weakness had the nightmare not left him shaking so badly he could hardly breathe.

Sighing, the kingdom-less Prince slid out from beneath the sheet, walking tiredly over to his window and gazing out at the stars. A sob almost forced its way from his throat. The blackness of the night sky reminded him of Kakarrot's eyes.

A lonely tear slipped unnoticed down Vegeta's cheek. He wanted Kakarrot so badly. The months without contact had only strengthened the need to stare into that handsome, innocent face, to be held in those strong arms. Without taking a moment to ponder his actions, Vegeta pulled the window open and flew out into the night, feeling Frieza's breath in the biting coolness of the wind.

--

Goku stared down miserably at his pillow, his new appendage drooping sadly over his thigh. He hadn't seen Vegeta in months, nor had he been able to talk to him over the phone. Trunks had called him a couple of times, but the teenage princeling usually didn't know where his father was, and Goku felt no need to drag him into the situation.

Kami, what had he done wrong? Had he been too forward with his feelings? It was hard to believe that Vegeta was so shy of contact, that the man who had held him down on the ground and beaten the life out of him on numerous occasions seemed afraid to hold his hand. Oh, what he wouldn't give to pin his Prince down and tear that veil of fear and despondence to pieces. Goku's face flushed at the thought of Vegeta's lithe body writhing beneath his hands. If only it weren't a mere dream…

The tall Saiyan looked up suddenly as an unexpected spike of ki drew his attention to the slightly open window at the other end of the room. He gasped. Could it…be? Was it really him? A stronger wave of energy put to rest any thought that he might be imagining it. It was Vegeta, and it was _close_.

Tearing his bedcovers away, Goku bounced out of bed and ran to the front door, taking a deep breath. Why would the Prince come to his house in the dead of night? Had something bad happened? Biting his lip, the gentle Saiyan twisted the knob, stepping outside.

He wasn't fully prepared for what he saw.

Less than a foot away stood Vegeta, dressed in only a pair of tight-fitting, deep black spandex shorts, arms hanging at his sides. A pair of deep ebony eyes stopped all intelligent thoughts in their tracks. The Prince looked miserable.

Choking on air, Goku let his eyes wander down to Vegeta's hands, noticing the subtle movement in shock. He was…trembling.

All desires suddenly paled in comparison to getting the Prince out of the cold. The tall Saiyan ran to the front door and pulled it open, watching as Vegeta stepped into the front room, eyes lowered. He shut the door quickly and looked down at the slighter Saiyan, forcing the words from his already choked throat. "Are you okay?"

Half-expecting Vegeta to snap at him for the comment, Goku was surprised when the Prince shrugged, looking hesitantly up at him.

"Kakarrot, I-" A pause. "May I st-stay here tonight?"

Though the tall Saiyan was no less than shocked, he had no trouble replying almost instantly. "Of course." He bit back the urge to run a hand down Vegeta's face. "Are you okay?"

The Prince broke his gaze immediately, staring at the floor. "I-I don't know. I-" He fell silent and stared back up at Goku. Deciding that right now wasn't the best time for questioning, the tall Saiyan tentatively took Vegeta's hand and began to walk in the direction of his bedroom, feeling mildly surprised when the latter made no attempt to escape his grasp.

Strolling into the small area, Goku felt the Prince pull out of his grasp. Vegeta's eyes widened when he sat down on the bed, watching as the gentle Saiyan beckoned him over. "Are you coming?" Goku asked, noting the confusion in Vegeta's glossy black orbs. His Prince backed away slightly, shaking his head. "I-I will sleep in the other room, Kakarrot. There is no need for-for me to-" Vegeta had no time to finish his statement before Goku slid over, making extra space.

"Vegeta, please-" The tall Saiyan halted in his plea. He couldn't just ask Vegeta to sleep in the same bed, but he wanted to give him comfort so badly. He simply needed the Prince to know that he was always safe in his presence. Sighing, Goku tried again. "There's plenty of room. I mean…you can have the bed. It's okay. I'll sleep in the other-"

All words failed him when Vegeta made his way back to the bed, sliding under the covers. However, no sooner had the Prince slipped beneath the sheets than he jerked back in shock, eyes enormous. "K-Kakarrot, your tail!"

Goku smiled self-consciously, letting the sable appendage drift out from beneath the blankets. "Yeah. It grew back a couple weeks ago, I guess." He paused, watching as it raised itself and flopped stupidly about, nearly hitting Vegeta in the head. The tall Saiyan grinned despite himself. "Sorry. I can't really control it, you know. I haven't had one since I was a kid."

Vegeta nodded, his own tail curling around his narrow waist. Goku found himself staring at it, unable to tear his gaze away, and didn't even notice his own tail's unprompted movements until the tip brushed against Vegeta's cheek. Startled, the gentle Saiyan yanked his appendage away and stared down at the bedspread, face heated. "Sorry."

--

The Prince's lips parted at the unknowingly intimate gesture. This entire night seemed far too good to actually be happening. Here he was, in Kakarrot's _bed_ (which, he knew, was the one place he most wanted to be at), and he hadn't even shown the tall Saiyan any form of thanks. Though the last vestiges of his pride cried out at the prospect of admitting that he needed Kakarrot's help, Vegeta couldn't care less at the moment. The gentle Saiyan had already given him so much, and he needed to give back in any way he could, even though he knew he would be mocked for his weakness.

Biting his lip, he slowly turned to face Goku, placing a shaky hand on the third class' shoulder. "Kakarrot, I-" He closed his eyes, awaiting the inevitable scorn and laughter. "I appreciate it."

He could only gape as the tall Saiyan leaned down to him, pressing satin lips gently against his own.

Shocked beyond all measure, Vegeta tentatively kissed back, slowly linking his arms around Kakarrot's neck. The Prince had almost no time to react to the unexpected show of affection before Goku carefully crawled over him, pinning his body lightly to the mattress, attacking his mouth passionately. A low moan of contentment escaped Vegeta's throat. Oh, what could be better than this? He felt so protected, so…safe.

--

Goku smiled into the Prince's mouth. Yes, this was what he wanted. For Vegeta to let go, to accept his love. It seemed simply amazing that the slighter Saiyan was beneath him, stretching for more contact. Kami, how could someone so beautiful exist? Those firm yet lean muscles, the soft bronze skin, his deep black eyes. Vegeta was simply…wonderful.

Eager to feel more of his Prince's body, Goku rested a hand experimentally on Vegeta's chest, delighted when the latter leaned into his touch. Never once breaking their kiss, the gentle Saiyan slid his hand lower, his fingertips just brushing Vegeta's left inner thigh…

He had no time to venture further before the Prince released his lips, forcefully shoving him away.

--

Vegeta snarled, eyes stinging with impending tears. Had-had Kakarrot seen it? Did he know? The Prince hastily covered his leg with the sheet, sliding further beneath the covers. Kami, he couldn't let Goku see the mark. If there was any hope at all that Kakarrot would retain his feelings for him, the former simply couldn't know of its existence.

Painstakingly pulling his eyes up to meet Goku's, the Prince felt his heart twinge at Kakarrot's broken expression. "I'm s-sorry. I just-" Vegeta sighed, pressing closer to the larger Saiyan. "It's-it's nothing. Just…not now."

To his relief, Goku smiled back at him, taking his hand. "Okay, I understand." A gentle kiss to his palm.

As he drifted off to sleep, Vegeta found himself wishing that Kakarrot's words were true.

* * *

A bit of a short chapter, but I like it nonetheless X3. Please R&R.


	9. Affection

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop **

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, WIFE BASHING (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, angst, anything one can warn about.

Summary: Vegeta's feelings for Goku get the best of him one day, but his pride won't stand for it. Events that follow prove to change him forever. Blah…

Author's note (changes with chapter): Hmm, not much to say this time. Just that we're working towards some rather graphic stuff here (lemons, gore, etc.), so I'll hafta censor the fic if I don't wanna get booted off . Fortunately, you can find this fic and others of mine **uncensored** on my MediaMiner account (go to my FF profile and find the link). This particular chapter isn't censored at all, but some upcoming ones WILL be so…be warned. Don't worry, I'll let you know which ones. Thanks XD

'_Text' _- Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

--

**Chapter 9: Affection -**

Goku woke abruptly the next morning, eyes snapping open as the terrified scream echoed in his ears. Gasping, the tall Saiyan sat up in bed and stared down at the shaking form in his arms, watching as Vegeta writhed and trembled in his grasp. "No…don't…" The Prince's voice was hoarse yet desperate. "P-Please don't take him away…"

Lips parting, Goku gently shifted Vegeta's body and ran a soothing hand down his naked back, stroking the bronze flesh with concern. "Shhh." he ushered, sliding his cheek against the smaller warrior's. "It's okay, you're only dreaming." He gave the Prince a little shake, gripping the powerful shoulders. To his surprise, Vegeta halted all movement and pressed himself against the larger Saiyan's chest, his upswept flame of hair brushing Goku's face. "No…not Raditz…"

Goku blinked in disbelief, softly stroking his Prince's hair as a past memory flooded back to him. _"Uhnnn…Raditz…"_ The tall Saiyan shivered at the reminder. Had Vegeta and his brother been _more_ than fellow fighters? Had their relationship extended beyond that of two Saiyan comrades? Goku's heart couldn't help but ache a bit at the prospect. Did Vegeta see him as a replacement for his brother?

His thoughts were interrupted when the Prince jerked up abruptly, comprehension lighting his black eyes. Vegeta sat up shakily on the taller's stomach, thighs draped over either side of the larger body as he stared down into Goku's face. The gentle Saiyan looked back, removing his hands from Vegeta's back, afraid that the unrequested contact would anger the slighter warrior. What happened next left him still with shock.

The Prince leaned down and pressed his cheek against Goku's, trembling. "K-Kakarrot."

--

Vegeta sighed as the heat of Kakarrot's face came into contact with his own. GodS, how he had missed this touch, the burning heat of Saiyan flesh. He shuddered, the grisly nightmare still fresh in his mind. The Prince clung more tightly to Goku, feeling a strong hand slip into his hair. "It's okay, calm down." Kakarrot's voice was soft. "Don't worry, it was just a dream."

Vegeta's eyes snapped open, all comfort receding at the unintentionally revealing statement. How did Kakarrot know? Had he…Oh no.

Fear seeping into every muscle, the Prince pulled out of Goku's warm embrace and sat back on the other edge of the bed, shaking. "Kakarrot, how…What do you mean?"

The larger Saiyan blinked slowly, dark eyes wide. "Well, you were talking about-about Raditz. You seemed really…Vegeta?"

The Prince slid off the bed and walked briskly out of the room, turning his face away to hide the single tear that trailed down it. So Kakarrot knew. The beautiful bastard knew about his relationship with Raditz. Kami, what was he supposed to do now? How much had he unknowingly told the fool?

Growling at his own stupidity, Vegeta stopped in his tracks and stared down at the floor, eyes brimmed with tears. He couldn't do this anymore. He couldn't go on pretending that Kakarrot didn't mean anything to him.

Vegeta had lost his pride, he had lost Raditz, and he couldn't bear to lose Goku as well, even if it meant losing himself.

--

Goku softly walked up behind Vegeta, placing hands tentatively around the narrow waist. He knew he should probably leave his Prince alone and let him calm down, but something inside him wouldn't allow that. Vegeta was in distress, and all he wanted was to make everything better. Sighing, he pulled the slighter Saiyan against him.

"Can I help?"

Vegeta flinched visibly at the sound of Kakarrot's voice. Overwhelmed with the need to comfort his Prince, Goku gently turned him around and bent down slightly, placing his lips on the bronze flesh of Vegeta's cheek. He carefully kissed the crystal tears away, marveling at the smaller warrior's lack of resistance. Acting on instinct, Goku softly licked at the remaining moisture, the tangy taste of salt on his tongue.

The tall Saiyan had barely finished his ministrations when Vegeta's mouth latched onto his, royal lips pressing softly against his own.

A sound of pleased surprise escaping his throat, Goku eagerly lapped at his Prince's lower lip, moaning when he was granted access to the moist cavern beyond. Vegeta kissed back just as fervently, bare hands pulling at his shirt, chest pressed to his own. The smaller Saiyan's impassioned moan sent sparks of heat shooting directly into Goku's groin.

Cheeks heated, the tall Saiyan reluctantly pulled away from the tempting heat of Vegeta's mouth, forcing himself to look his Prince in the eye. Noticing confusion in the other's ebony orbs, Goku ran a comforting hand along Vegeta's shoulder, biting his lip. "I-I'm gonna get something to eat." A thoroughly uncomfortable silence. "You want anything?"

Vegeta shook his head, turning away. Wondering if he had accidentally angered the Prince, Goku watched the object of his concern look back, eyes stony. "Spar, Kakarrot. Ten minutes."

Confused, the larger Saiyan watched as Vegeta strolled to the door and stepped outside, shutting it quickly behind him.

--

Fists clenched, the Prince of all Saiyans hovered above Goku's capsule house, waiting. So here it was. The opportunity to ascend to Super Saiyan Three was here. A dry smirk finally broke his previously set expression. Hopefully he wouldn't blow himself up this time.

Sighing, Vegeta bit his lips, arms hanging listlessly at his sides. He wasn't sure how he felt about his newfound power, nor how Kakarrot expected him to feel about it. Should he be excited? Happy? The Prince scoffed. Right now all he felt was the need to pound something into a bloody pulp.

His eyes widened slightly as a realization hit home. For the first time since he had met Goku, he didn't feel any anger towards him. He didn't feel the need to surpass, to defeat. Was it because they were now at the same level of power? Vegeta shook his head detachedly. That wasn't the reason.

He wasn't angry at Kakarrot because he was angry at himself.

Power surged through Vegeta's muscles, awakening his previously exhausted body. What a weakling he was! He couldn't keep Kakarrot from invading his every thought, couldn't keep himself from falling victim to the advances of a third-class. He couldn't even keep the tears from leaking down his cheeks.

Growling deep in his throat, Vegeta flared into Super Saiyan 2, golden ki rushing in waves about him. He threw his head back with relief as the warming energy flooded his veins, the sound of sparks crackling in his ears. The sweet sense of battle ran through the Prince's blood, his muscles flexing as he threw a punch into the empty air. He was Saiyan. The fight was in his nature.

Hungry for battle, the Prince launched a deadly kick to his right, eyes snapping open as a surprised yelp met his sensitive ears. Eyes opening, Vegeta stared back at his accidental victim, watching as Goku rubbed frantically at his stomach.

"Ow!" The tall Saiyan looked back at him. "W-What was that for?"

Vegeta couldn't stop the instinctive chuckle from escaping his throat. However, the hurt look on Goku's face halted any further laughter in its tracks. "I didn't mean to, Kakarrot. I was practicing." he reassured the larger fighter, ignoring the realization that it was overly strange for him to be doing such a thing. Hovering backwards, Vegeta raised his ki and waited, somehow unable to voice his desire for a fight.

Luckily, Goku seemed to understand what he wanted. The larger fighter powered up to Super Saiyan, ascending to the next level within a matter of moments. Both warriors stared at one another, silence stretching between them as each waited for the other to make a move. Finally, Vegeta screamed his battle lust to the sky, extending a fist and lunging at the tall Saiyan. A smirk pulled at his lips. The fight ensued.

--

Goku smiled as he blocked punch after punch, grunting as he avoided the Prince's blows, throwing punches of his own in return. It had been months since he had witnessed that gleam of passion in Vegeta's eyes, that Saiyan battle hunger that only he and his Prince shared. He growled in challenge and sent a kick flying towards Vegeta's unprotected head, only to have his leg caught and smacked aside. Goku wasn't able to keep back a laugh of joy. This was the fiery Prince he loved.

Before the tall Saiyan could further react to the blow, the look on Vegeta's face stopped him dead in his tracks. Formerly passionate eyes went dull, the lithe body stiffening. The Prince halted all movement, staring back at Goku in what appeared to be a mix of disbelief and hopelessness.

The gentle Saiyan looked back, heart falling. What was wrong? Had he…

Goku almost kicked himself for his stupidity. Vegeta thought he was laughing at him.

Eyes going wide, the larger warrior opened and closed his mouth wordlessly, trying to think of how best to explain. He didn't want to lose sight of that wonderful Saiyan passion that he hadn't seen for countless days.

"Kakarrot!"

Blinking rapidly, Goku stared back at his Prince, half afraid he was about to be attacked. He was both relieved and confused when Vegeta stayed put. "Go Super Saiyan Three, Kakarrot." His eyes narrowed. "Don't hold anything back."

Paralyzed by the seriousness in the smaller warrior's black orbs, Goku found himself nodding in agreement. If Vegeta wanted him to give his all, that was what he would do. Anything to assure his Prince that he thought of him as nothing less than an equal.

Raising his ki level, the larger Saiyan raised his arms and let heated ki flow through his muscles, power consuming his body. With a final yell, he ascended to Three, feeling golden locks of hair cascade down his back. Waves of hot energy rushed about him.

Sighing, he lowered his arms and looked back at Vegeta, aquamarine eyes widening. The Prince clenched his fists sporadically, head thrown back, aura rushing with rising ki. Goku's lips parted at the sheer amount of energy Vegeta was producing. If he kept up this way, his Prince would reach…

The tall Saiyan blinked in realization. Super Saiyan Three. Vegeta was trying to power up to match his level. It was all Goku could do from screaming for his Prince to lower his ki. What if history repeated itself and Vegeta was incinerated? Kami, he didn't think he could live without his Prince any longer.

A high spike of ki drew Goku's attention back to the situation at hand. He felt himself gasp in shock as Vegeta's hair lengthened, locks of gold growing back over the Prince's shoulders. Vegeta screamed, energy rushing about him, cool wind whipping through his new mane. The mere sight left Goku breathless.

All the larger warrior could do was watch as his Prince lowered his head, staring back at him with an identical pair of blue eyes. The light of Vegeta's aura defined his bare arms and chest, skin shining in the golden glow. Goku observed the expressionless face with awe. Beautiful…

Hardly a moment passed before Vegeta sprung towards him, fist extended, eyes shining with newfound power. Amazed at his speed, Goku darted quickly backwards and caught the attacking hand, eyes drifting up to observe Vegeta's face. His gaze ran over light eyes, lush lips, and the larger fighter simply couldn't hold back any longer.

Grip tightening on the Prince's fist, Goku crushed Vegeta against him and pressed his lips to the other's, his free hand fisting tightly in the smaller warrior's hair. He groaned in undisguised desire as he plundered Vegeta's mouth, loving the feel of his Prince's hands clinging at his shirt. The smaller warrior licked insistently at Goku's lower lip, causing a grin to spread across its owner's face. The tall Saiyan smiled into his Prince's mouth. So impatient. This was _definitely_ the Vegeta he knew.

Goku began to shiver in excitement when Vegeta pulled wantonly at his mane, moaning into the kiss. His Prince rubbed sinuously against him, the tight spandex shorts doing nothing to disguise to press of his arousal against the taller Saiyan's thigh. Goku gasped, Vegeta's soft locks running through his fingers. GodS, this was too good to be true…

"I hate to interrupt you two, but you're on my favorite meditating grounds."

Both Saiyans' eyes snapped open.

--

XP


	10. Desire

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop **

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, wife bashing (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, angst, anything one can warn about.

Summary: Vegeta's feelings for Goku get the best of him one day, but his pride won't stand for it. Events that follow prove to change him forever. Blah…

Author's note (changes with chapter): Getting close to the lemon, folks! I find this chapter relatively amusing, despite the rather lame attempts at humor X3 Anyways, I might end up throwing some MPREG into the story later (depending on whether readers want it or not), so please let me know by way of review/message whether you'd like that to be a part of the fic. -knows what Julie will say- XD

Oh, and by the way…the next chapter is the lemon!! XP

'_Text' _- Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

--

**Chapter 10: Desire-**

Blinking in shock, Goku reluctantly pulled away from Vegeta's mouth, hands still fisted in the smaller's golden mane. What in the world? Who was… His eyes fell upon the annoyed-looking Namekian. Oh.

Suspicions confirmed, the gentle Saiyan stared back at his long-time friend, mouth opening and closing repeatedly as he hastened to explain himself. However, as there really wasn't much to explain, Goku decided to remain silent, extinguishing his power until his hair stood in spikes again.

Piccolo raised a hairless brow, eyes wide with surprise. "You know, I'm not even going to ask." The Namek crossed his arms, his previously green face turning a rather spectacular shade of violet. "Goku, your wife says she needs to meet you about something." He paused. "Gohan told me you moved out."

Eventually getting his throat to work properly, the larger Saiyan nodded in affirmation, avoiding Piccolo's gaze as he stared down at the top of Vegeta's head. "Yeah. W-why?"

"I don't know." The Namek cleared his throat. "But I'd go find out, if I were you. I wouldn't tempt that woman's wrath." A short stretch of silence. "No offense."

Chuckling slightly, Goku forced himself to look back at the uncomfortable Namekian. "Yeah, okay. Thanks, Piccolo. I-We'll leave."

Piccolo shook his head quickly, waving long hands out in front of him frantically. "No! I mean, it's okay. I've…had enough surprises for one day."

With a final parting glance, the Namek turned around and zoomed off in the opposite direction, leaving the two Saiyans entangled in each other's arms.

Sighing, Goku stared down at his Prince, surprised at the lack of speech. He hadn't even begun to decide what to say next when Vegeta's head dropped in exhaustion, muscles trembling as the energy dissipated from them. The tall Saiyan watched with concern as his Prince's hair shrunk back to its normal size, fading to the regular shade of midnight black. For one terror-filled moment, Goku thought Vegeta had fainted, and was only relieved when the latter managed to look up into his eyes.

"Vegeta." Goku couldn't think of what to say. He had no idea what Vegeta was feeling, and the expressionless face only helped to confuse him further. Stumped, the gentle Saiyan found himself lost in the ebony depths of his Prince's eyes, unable to look away. Kami, the beauty…

"Kakarrot."

The enticingly husky voice managed to pull him back to reality. Lips parting, Goku stared at his Prince in surprise. "Wha-Huh?"

Vegeta crossed his arms, eyes narrowed. "Your harpy, Kakarrot." A single, regal blink. "Go see to whatever it is she wants."

At the mere thought of his wife, Goku shook his head detachedly, mouth moving as he tried to speak. A strong finger rested on his lips, halting any speech. "Go. I will not leave here, Kakarrot."

The tall Saiyan brightened, resisting the urge to lick his lips when the digit was removed. He observed the serious face with slight worry. "Promise?"

Vegeta nodded curtly, causing a smile to blossom across Goku's face. "Okay." A slight ache in the pit of his stomach directed his attention to other matters. "Maybe I can make some lunch for us when I get back."

Goku thought he saw a shadow of a smile flicker over his Prince's face before he turned around, giving a departing wave. "Bye, 'Geta."

Biting his lip, the gentle Saiyan reluctantly pressed two fingers to his forehead, Vegeta's voice echoing in his mind as he flickered out of sight.

--

"Here. Sign." Chichi pushed the stack of papers at him, hawk-like eyes narrowed as she gestured to a nearby pen. Gulping, Goku stared down at the top sheet, quickly scrawling his name. "So, uh, what's this for?"

The woman rolled her eyes. "It's called a divorce. I sign the papers, you sign them, and our marriage is off."

"Oh." He signed the next two sheets, fiddling with his wristband. He just wanted to go home to Vegeta…

"Goku!"

The tall Saiyan stared back at his estranged wife. "What?"

"You're wrinkling the papers!" Sighing with exasperation, Chichi pulled the stack of parchment out from under Goku's hand, straightening it carefully. "These need to be perfect, Goku! I have to make sure that the lawyer takes them!"

Holding back his annoyance, the Saiyan nodded quickly and stood from his seat, anxious to get back to Vegeta. "Well, I guess I'll get going. See you-" "Oh no!" Chichi blocked the doorway, glaring coldly at him. "You're not going anywhere! There are more papers to sign!"

Unable to hold back a frustrated sigh, Goku slumped down in the nearest chair, brows furrowed.

--

"Damn it! Son of a bitch!" Vegeta growled, yanking the oversized pants up, furiously tying the knot more tightly as he turned his attention back to the job at hand. Hell, how in the GodS names did anyone expect him to do this sort of thing?! These damn ningen terms made no sense!

Snarling, the perturbed Prince wiped his face and went back to his previous task, a gleam of challenge sparkling in his dark eyes.

--

The tall Saiyan pushed the final paper away, watching as the woman snatched it up and smoothed out the creases. "Goku, where is Goten right now?" The sharp tone grated on Goku's nerves.

"He's just out at Capsule Corp. with Trunks, Chichi." he explained, not wanting to admit that Goten was there because of their split. "Just spending some time with his friend."

The human scoffed. "Bulma was the only good thing about that family. Vegeta has always been a bad role model, and I have a feeling that Trunks is no different!"

Goku couldn't stifle a growl at the mention of his Prince. "That's not true." He seethed. "Trunks is a good kid and Vegeta's…he's…"

"What? A killer? A psychopath?!" Chichi cackled, folding her arms.

Goku gritted his teeth, control lost. "No! He's wonderful! You don't understand!"

The woman glared, squaring her shoulders as if preparing for a fight. "I don't understand?! He's a Saiyan, isn't he? Just like you! Monsters, with those horrid tails!" She spat, staring at the sable appendage as if she could set it on fire with her mind.

Tail curling defensively around his waist, Goku stood hurriedly and walked to the door, taking a final glance back at his now ex-wife. "So that's all?" The words were choked with anger.

Chichi nodded once, eyes flashing with something that Goku was sure he didn't like. "Don't bother coming over here again!"

As Goku pressed two fingers to his head, he silently admitted that he'd never been happier.

--

Muttered curses met Goku's ears as he reappeared in the small kitchen. Confused, the tall Saiyan glanced around for the source of the noise, spotting it almost immediately. His lips parted in shock as he realized what was going on.

Over the countertop stood Vegeta, clothed in only a pair of Goku's gi pants. Smears of what appeared to be flour graced his bare arms, chest, and face. The tall Saiyan could only watch as his Prince vigorously stirred the large bowl in front of him, snarling under his breath.

It only took a few seconds before Vegeta's body tensed, its owner stopping all movement. As he turned to face the younger Saiyan, Goku caught sight of the red box that sat conspicuously on the countertop, and read its black lettering with awe.

**Pancake Mix.**

Overwhelmed with surprise and joy, Goku stared into his Prince's face, noticing the light streak of red that was dusted over the smaller's cheeks. Unable to speak, the gentle Saiyan's eyes locked onto Vegeta's, a feeling of lightness in his heart.

--

The Prince's eyes widened, mouth moving wordlessly. "I…you said…lunch…" He eventually stuttered, feeling the sensation of heat crawl across his face. Perfect. Just fucking perfect. He couldn't even cook a decent meal for Kakarrot and the idiot had to show up before he could rid himself of the mess. Vegeta stared at the floor, cheeks burning. He must look ridiculous.

The slighter Saiyan waited for the taunting, the humiliation, and was shocked when it didn't come. Confused, Vegeta raised his head to look back at the larger Saiyan, only to find a pair of hot velvet lips pressed against his own.

--

Goku slipped his tongue between Vegeta's lips, reveling in the warm heat of his Prince's mouth. Kami, Vegeta had cared enough to make _lunch_ for him? Though he didn't know why the gesture meant so much, he couldn't honestly say that he cared at the moment. Right now, the heat of Vegeta's body against his own, the feel of royal lips on his, were the only things that mattered.

Moaning, Goku ran a gentle hand over his Prince's naked back, diving in to further attack his lips. He slowly drank Vegeta in, feeling the smaller Saiyan grab at his shirt, loving the impassioned groan that Vegeta released into his mouth. Sighing, he moved to slide a hand down the Prince's chest when something curled around his tail, ruffling the fur.

The gentle Saiyan almost pulled away for fear of being hurt when sensations of pleasure coursed through his body, desire igniting every vein, heating his blood. Sighing shamelessly, Goku gave his Prince a final kiss and turned to look behind him, eyes lidded.

Gasping, he watched Vegeta's tail twine with his own, lips parted as the gentle stroking left him breathless. GodS, the pleasure…

Turning back to stare at his Prince, Goku found himself staring into an identical pair of hooded eyes, tongue trailing over his lower lip at the mere sight of Vegeta's flushed face. Unable to hold back any longer, the taller Saiyan pressed two fingers to his forehead and reappeared in his bedroom, pinning Vegeta down on the bed.

Aware of his growing arousal, Goku pressed himself as close as the Prince would allow and licked hungrily at his neck, curling his tail around Vegeta's own, lost in the feel of fur on fur.

Fully drunk on his Prince's scent, the larger Saiyan ran a hand down Vegeta's thigh, stroking the smooth skin beneath the light cloth. The slighter Saiyan squirmed in his grasp, breaking away from their kiss. It took a few moments for Goku to realize that Vegeta was fighting to get away.

Thoroughly perplexed, the gentle Saiyan rolled off of his Prince and stared back, panting as Vegeta's tail curled around its owner's waist. Noticing the broken expression on Vegeta's face, Goku resisted the urge to run a hand along Vegeta's arm. "Wh-what's wrong?"

--

Vegeta stared down at the bedspread, thoroughly ashamed. He instinctively slipped beneath the bedcovers, covering his left thigh with the blanket, face burning. GodS, how was he expected to explain this? He didn't want to think about that damn brand, much less explain its origin aloud. Tears threatening to leak from his eyes, Vegeta placed a hand over the covered mark.

"You-you don't want me, Kakarrot." He managed to choke out, eyes closing in shame. "I am…I have been…_used_."

The Prince couldn't bring himself to look Goku in the eye. He didn't think he could force himself to say any more. He didn't want to relive those awful years, those painful memories. His hand clenched on the unseen scar.

Feeling a gentle hand smooth over the flesh of his cheek, Vegeta jerked back and opened his eyes, finding Kakarrot's face directly across from his. Wide eyes were tinted with concern.

Slowly, Goku looked down at Vegeta's left hand, placing his own atop it. The Prince could only shiver as his hand was softly grasped and pulled aside. GodS, Kakarrot was so warm…

Unable to look away, Vegeta watched as Goku's hand stroked down his chest in a comforting motion before stopping at the waist of his pants. Kakarrot stilled all movement and looked up at him, eyes large in a silent plea to venture further. Eyes drifting shut, Vegeta let his head fall, not wanting to know Goku's reaction to his…mark.

His breath caught in his throat when he felt Kakarrot's hands grasp the side of his pants, carefully slipping them down to his knees. A finger traced his scar and he stiffened. This was it. Any hope for Kakarrot's love or understanding was sure to die in that single moment. A tear trailed down his cheek.

--

Goku stared in shock at the small mark, running his hand over it lightly. It looked like an…F. He cocked an eyebrow, looking up to Vegeta's face for some sort of answer. The expression of misery made his heart sink in realization. F…for Frieza.

The gentle Saiyan gasped aloud at his discovery. Vegeta had been branded with Frieza's mark? He frowned. As saddened and disgusted as he was by such a concept, he knew there was something that didn't make sense. Goku was aware that the Prince had been a warrior of Frieza's before he had first journeyed to Earth, but why would the tyrant brand him on the thigh? Why not on the arm or something, where people could see?

As Vegeta's flesh began to shake beneath his fingers, Goku was nearly bowled over by the realization. _Used_…the Prince's admission echoed in his mind. Vegeta had been raped.

Goku stared at his Prince in shock. Raped. His strong, brave, beautiful Prince had been _raped_. No wonder Vegeta was afraid to be touched so intimately, no wonder he had such a hatred for Frieza and his followers. Goku would have been blinded with rage had Vegeta's trembling form not occupied every drop of his concern.

Biting his lip, the gentle Saiyan ran a comforting hand over his Prince's face. Oh, all he wanted to do was rid that regal visage of those awful tears. He would make Vegeta forget his worries, even if only for now, only for one night. He would make his wonderful Prince forget.

A single tear leaking from his eye, Goku leaned forward and captured Vegeta's lips in a gentle kiss, running a hand through the soft flame of hair. He gently pulled away after a few moments, noticing the confusion in his Prince's beautiful eyes. Goku smiled. "Let it go, Vegeta." He whispered, taking the smaller Saiyan's hand in his own. "Let it go."

--

;.;


	11. Need

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop **

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, wife bashing (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, angst, anything one can warn about.

Author's note (changes with chapter): Lemonade, anyone? Because of restrictions, I unfortunately can't post the lemon portion on (this is why readers will not have much to read in this chapter; the lemon has been censored out), but you can read the entire chapter UNCENSORED by

1. Go to my profile.

2. Click the "**Chapter Uncensored**" Link under "**Story Updates**".

(Note: It may take awhile for my profile to update itself. Be patient.)

'_Text' _- Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

--

**Chapter 11: Need-**

Vegeta stared back at the tall Saiyan, shock lighting his coal black eyes, tears threatening to spill over. Kakarrot still…wanted him? He didn't care about what Frieza had done? The Prince blinked in disbelief.

"You-you don't…" Vegeta choked, unable to finish the question. Submitting to the tightness in his throat, he looked desperately at Goku, a sigh escaping his lips. Kakarrot didn't understand. That was why the larger Saiyan wasn't reacting; the beautiful bastard still didn't know what his mark meant. He hung his head in distress. If only he could somehow get Goku to realize…

Seemingly sensing his Prince's inner struggle, the gentle Saiyan pressed a careful kiss to Vegeta's palm, the heat of his lips sending shivers down the latter's spine. Goku slipped under the covers, reaching out to touch Vegeta's face. "I-I understand, Vegeta."

The smaller Saiyan closed his eyes, anticipating rejection, waiting for the abuse that was sure to come at any moment. His breathing shaky, Vegeta endured the terrifying seconds that passed, confusion blossoming over his features. If Kakarrot was going to hurt him, why didn't he get it over with?

Mustering up the courage it had taken a lifetime to build, Vegeta forced himself to look up at the larger Saiyan, staring into wide, dark eyes. He froze. GodS, the look on Kakarrot's face…it almost seemed…_hurt_.

Lips parting, Vegeta mentally smacked himself, a stab of pain shooting through his heart. What had he done?! Kakarrot didn't deserve to be put through his own personal Hell! How could he force Goku to deal with his problems?!

Overwhelmed by the desire to comfort the larger Saiyan, Vegeta leaned forward and pressed his lips against the ones that tempted him, fisting his hands in Goku's hair as he tried to show the younger man the extent of his regret. _'GodS, Kakarrot, I'm sorry…'_

* * *

**CENSORED** for lemon content! Go to profile for the link to the chapter uncensored!

* * *

Goku opened his eyes slightly, brow furrowing as his gaze fell upon the Prince's shaking form. His breath left him as he watched Vegeta tremble, burying his face in the sheets.

Vegeta was crying.

--

X'D Review please.


	12. Understand

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop **

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, wife bashing (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, angst, graphic sex, MPREG (later), anything one can warn about.

Author's note (changes with chapter): The story continues XP. Angst, angst, angst.

'_Text' _- Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

--

**Chapter 12: Understand-**

Vegeta choked back his sobs, muscles shaking as he struggled to retain any dignity that he could possibly have left. GodS, what had he done? Had he really claimed Kakarrot as his mate? He trembled, horrified by his actions. He didn't want to suffer through what Goku would do to him when he found out.

A gentle hand on his shoulder only caused his sobs of grief to intensify. Vegeta shook his head slightly, eyes drifting open as he prepared to reveal what he was sure would cause his demise. Kakarrot had the right to know. He had already hurt the larger Saiyan enough; Goku didn't deserve to have his perfect, beautiful soul marred by the terrible memories in his mind. Taking a shallow breath, the Prince forced himself upright.

"K-Kakarrot." He choked out, vision blurred by the tears that refused to stop coming up. "Do y-you know why-why you bit me?"

He could only watch as a look of confusion fluttered over Goku's features. "Well, not really." The larger Saiyan shrugged slightly, obviously perplexed by the turn their conversation was taking. "I mean, it just seemed like the right thing to do, I guess."

Vegeta would have chuckled had the circumstances not been so incredibly dire. Neck twinging with the pain of Goku's bite, the smaller Saiyan hung his head, overcome with misery. "It-It is a bond, Kakarrot." He eventually stuttered. "We are…connected, now. We…" Vegeta paused, petrified by the look of worry in Goku's eyes. "We can h-hear each other's thoughts."

Unable to continue, the Prince shut his eyes tightly and turned around, tears spilling freely down his face. "Y-You…You can leave, Kakarrot. You n-never have to see me again." The taste of blood was sour in the back of his throat. "G-Go! Please, Kakarrot!"

All coherent words were halted in their tracks as he began to sob heavily once more, head hung in despair.

Hardly a moment passed before he felt strong arms grip him around the chest, pulling him slowly back. Blinking wearily, Vegeta shook violently as he was gathered into a gentle embrace, anticipating abuse. Shock gradually replaced grief as the Prince felt large hands moving slowly across his back.

Taking a pained look up into Goku's soft eyes, Vegeta gulped back a sob and buried his head into the larger's chest, unable to calm his trembling flesh. Kakarrot was so beautiful, so caring. GodS, what he wouldn't give to stay with Goku, trapped in this warm embrace. He would relinquish his power, his strength, what remained of his sanity. Anything to remain here with Kakarrot forever.

Sobbing uncontrollably, Vegeta allowed Kakarrot to pull him closer, disgusted with himself beyond words. His past memories, his feelings of rage and brutality, everything about him was to mar Kakarrot's perfect beauty. The clean, innocent soul was to be tarnished. And it was all his fault.

Unable to betray Goku's trust any more than necessary, Vegeta pulled himself from the blissful hug and stared Kakarrot hard in the face, silently pleading for him to leave. Goku deserved so much better than a deceitful, murderous bastard like him. He didn't deserve to be in the larger Saiyan's presence.

"Kakarrot-" A gentle finger over his lips halted his unsaid plea. He found himself frozen to the spot when Goku threw him a reassuring smile, slipping a comforting hand into his own.

"Shhh. It's okay." The larger Saiyan grasped his hand tightly. "We can talk about this later. Don't worry. Everything's going to be all right."

Vegeta found himself surrendering to the reassuring words. Speech leaving him completely, he nodded back numbly, calming slightly when he felt Kakarrot's lips against the flesh of his cheek. He watched as Goku pulled back, that same smile pulling at his mouth. "Do you wanna take a shower? I think we could both use one."

Mollified by the younger Saiyan's soft words, Vegeta nodded a second time, suddenly aware of the feel of sweat and essence clinging to his body. He allowed himself to be pulled to his feet, still shaking slightly as Kakarrot led him into the bathroom. Goku released his hand only to pull the shower curtain aside, turning on the water as he motioned for Vegeta to step in. "You can go first."

For a reason he couldn't identify at the moment, Vegeta shook his head immediately at the offer, staring at the floor. "You-You can join me, Kakarrot." A flush colored his face, tail fluffing out behind him.

"Okay." Vegeta could practically hear the smile in Goku's voice. "Go ahead, I'll be back in a minute." A kiss was pressed to his forehead before Kakarrot left the room, closing the door behind him.

Overwhelmed with emotion, Vegeta took a deep breath in an attempt to calm himself, stepping carefully into the shower. The feel of warm water on his skin caused him to move back in surprise. Why was it so hot? His previous experiences on Frieza's ship had led him to believe that only cold water was available in such a setting.

Sliding the shower curtain shut, the Prince carefully lowered himself to the floor, head hung as he allowed the warm water to pound at his tense muscles. He sighed. It was an odd new feeling, but not unpleasant in the least. Vegeta flinched as the hot water seeped into his bite wound, stinging the torn flesh, reminding him of the current predicament. Why couldn't he feel Kakarrot's emotions? Perhaps he had to actively search through the other's mind? He shook his head slightly. The extent of his knowledge about the bond had been taught to him by Raditz, and the larger warrior hadn't known much about it himself. Oh, Raditz…

Vegeta bit his lip, trying to concentrate on the pounding water against his sore flesh. GodS, how he missed his past lover. Nevertheless, he had always known that either the Frieza's cruelty or the ferocity of battle would have eventually taken one of their lives, and Vegeta was glad that it had been the latter. Raditz had deserved to die doing what he loved.

He shook slightly at the memories, eyes squinted shut. Raditz had been his life, his everything. He had given Vegeta hope when all had seemed lost, comfort when Frieza had tortured him for hours on end. Though the years apart had dulled some of the pain, he knew he would never forget his strong Saiyan comrade. A single tear trailed down his cheek.

Gulping, Vegeta allowed his mind to wander back onto his new mate. Goku was so different from his brother. Raditz had been cunning, sarcastic, merciless, but Kakarrot was a polar opposite. Sure, he was often ruthless in battle, but he was also kind and caring. Understanding.

A rustling sound caused Vegeta's eyes to snap open, their owner looking up from his previous position. The Prince watched as Goku stepped into the shower behind him, smiling. "Enjoying the water, 'Geta?" He grinned softly, extending a hand in a silent offer to help him up. Unable to refuse, Vegeta grasped Goku's hand and allowed the other to pull him into a standing position, looking up hesitantly at the larger Saiyan. If only Kakarrot knew how wonderful he was…

Vegeta could only sigh as Goku pulled him into another embrace, rubbing his back tenderly. He found himself melting in the larger's grasp, surrounded by the heat of satin skin, hands stroking over his shoulders. GodS, where had his pride gone? Why wasn't he pounding Kakarrot's skull in, tearing savagely at the arms that held him so gently? He shook his head detachedly. Some Saiyan Prince he was.

Eyes drifting shut, Vegeta forced himself out of Kakarrot's arms and turned away, the mark on his shoulder aching as he avoided the taller's gaze.

--

Goku took another hesitant glance at his sitting Prince, tail twitching nervously on the bed beside him. GodS, everything was so much to take in. The bond, as Vegeta had called it, had left him more concerned than anything at the moment. While a part of him rejoiced in the fact that he and his wonderful Prince were together, Goku was intensely worried about how such a bond would affect Vegeta's mood. Oh, all he wanted was for his Prince to feel good, to accept both him and himself.

Staring out the nearby window at the quickly darkening sky, Goku turned towards Vegeta and leaned closer, observing the regal face with concern. The Prince, having had nothing to wear except the pair of black shorts, was now covered by articles of Goku's own clothing. The orange pants hung loosely on his smaller legs, and were held up by only the tight blue sash that was normally seen around the larger Saiyan's waist. Vegeta had chosen to remain shirtless, though Goku didn't know why and hadn't planned to ask. The bare chest gleamed in the dim light.

"Kakarrot."

The husky voice abruptly broke his train of thought. Looking up in surprise, Goku widened his eyes at the intensity that gleamed out from Vegeta's own jet orbs. "Huh?"

Vegeta stared back, the pure feeling in his gaze sending shivers up the taller Saiyan's spine. "The-The bond is permanent, Kakarrot." He choked out, head lowering slightly as if he expected to be hit. "Are you sure that…you w-want-" The Prince's eyes shut suddenly. "I am…s-sorry, Kakarrot."

Goku's breath left him in that instant. Vegeta was apologizing? GodS, he had never expected to hear those words leave his Prince's lips.

"You-You do not have to stay with me." The shorter said hopelessly, eyes stony with obvious pain. _'I will leave.'_

The taller Saiyan raised his head, shocked by the words that echoed through his mind. H-Had Vegeta said that aloud? Was he just imagining it?

"Don't leave." Goku pleaded, suspicions confirmed when Vegeta stared incredulously back at him. Unsure how to explain, he gestured to his head. "I heard you." He explained softly, eyes widening in realization. "The bond?"

The Prince nodded in agreement, eyes affixed on the table. A moment of strained silence passed before Vegeta was suddenly in his lap, arms wrapped tightly around his waist, head buried into his chest.

--

Vegeta clung to Kakarrot for his life, gripping the muscled body as he tried to retain his composure. If he was to remain in Goku's life, the larger Saiyan deserved to know everything. Though the last remnants of his pride cried out at the prospect of letting Kakarrot into his mind, Vegeta pushed aside all intelligent thoughts, the fabric of Goku's gi soft under his fingers.

"Kakarrot." He shivered as warm arms enveloped him, directing his question to the larger Saiyan's mind. _'Can you h-hear my thoughts?'_

A soft nod from above affirmed Vegeta's inquiry. Gulping, the smaller warrior pressed his head more firmly against Goku's chest, images of his past flickering about grimly in his head. He sighed, gripping tightly to the muscled arms, allowing the gruesome memories to drift through their bond. "H-here, Kakarrot." _'You deserve to know.'_

The strong body beneath him trembled noticeably, telling Vegeta that Goku had successfully delved into his thoughts. Tears formed in his eyes.

--

XD;


	13. Heat

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop **

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, wife bashing (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, angst, graphic sex, MPREG (later), anything one can warn about.

Author's note (changes with chapter): MORE angst. **Censored** for lemon(y) content.

'_Text' _- Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

--

**Chapter 13: Heat-**

Goku closed his eyes solemnly, stroking his Prince's hair in a gesture of comfort. Reaching out unobtrusively with his mind, he gasped as Vegeta's emotions floated through his head, touching lightly over the feelings. He stiffened slightly, wrapping careful arms around the lithe body. Sadness, grief, and fear echoed in his head, sending morbid tremors up the larger Saiyan's spine. A shroud of blackness cloaked his sight. Sounds and images fazed in and out of his mind.

"No! A-Ahhh!!" Vegeta's screams tricked like ice water in Goku's head, causing slight shakes to wrack his hands and arms. He saw a moving image of Frieza's face, sprinkled with the dark crimson of his Prince's blood. A mauve tongue slipped from sneering black lips, licking at the drops of royal life essence. "Stop! P-Please!!"

Goku shuddered as he realized what was going on. He saw through Vegeta's eyes, watching as the Ice Lord pounded into him again and again, shredding the skin of his arms to shreds, unbelievable agony shooting through torn muscles. A bloodied tail slipped deeper inside, tearing his inner muscles savagely, ripping the delicate flesh. He screamed out his pain, Vegeta's voice echoing in his ears as a long-nailed hand tugged mercilessly at his quivering tail. Tears seeping from his eyes, Goku shook his head violently and forced the memory from his mind, shaking violently as the stabs of pain receded from his body.

"V-Vegeta." He forced his eyes open, half afraid he was still inside the Prince's mind. GodS, the pain was…excruciating. Had he ever felt agony like that before in his life? How had Vegeta gotten through it?

Quieting, Goku held his mate as close as his arms would allow, shaking as Vegeta's screams of terror still drifting slightly though their bond. Terrified beyond all measure, he buried his face into the Prince's hair, clinging to him like a life raft. Kami, if he was frightened by just feeling those experiences, what must it have been like for his lover to _live through_ them?

Still trembling slightly, he forced his eyes open and looked down at the Prince, surprised to find that he was being stared at. He was even more shocked when the smaller Saiyan reached up, cupping the side of his face. "I'm-I'm sorry, K-Kakarrot." He hung his head, the flame of upswept hair brushing Goku's face. "You didn't d-deserve to be put through-" "It's all right." Goku cut the Prince off, holding him tightly. "I-I'm glad I know. Thank you for trusting me."

Several moments of silence passed, both Saiyans shaking in each other's arms. Only when the tiny movement stopped did Goku realize that something had happened. Concerned, he gently placed strong hands on his Prince's shoulders, shaking the other lightly. "Vegeta?" he asked, a heavy breath parting regal lips in answer. He ran a hand over his mate's forehead. Vegeta had lost consciousness.

Goku slipped Vegeta gently beneath the blankets, kissing the royal hand. He watched his mate slip over onto his side, head dropping limply onto the pillow, brow furrowed slightly. The larger Saiyan blinked with worry. Recalling such a terrible event must have really taken everything out of his lover. Plus, the bond was new, and reading his Prince's thoughts so early might have been too invasive an action for Vegeta to handle. Sighing, he covered the smaller with the thick blanket, slipping into bed beside him.

Taking a deep breath, Goku forced his mind away from Vegeta's thoughts, pressing softly against his mate's bare back. Vegeta had given him access to his body, his mind…Oh, GodS, he never thought that his Prince would ever find it in his heart to trust him. He would help his mate through everything, and nothing could stop him. He would make Vegeta feel safe again.

--

Goku slipped quietly back into the house, taking a final glance back at the barely risen sun. He sighed, hoisting the red bag over his shoulder. The tall Saiyan smiled to himself. It had taken a lot of time, but he had finally managed to collect the items that he needed before Vegeta woke. He let out a heavy breath of relief.

Tiptoeing down the hallway, Goku stepped cautiously towards the bedroom door, sensing Vegeta's ki behind it. Placing a hand on the knob, the tall Saiyan stepped back slightly as a sudden wave of lust washed over him, leaving his face flushed and eyes lidded. Goku swallowed, blinking in confusion. What was this about? He had been feeling perfectly normal a few seconds ago…

A sudden muffled groan brought Goku back to reality. "Uhnnn…Gha-ahhhh…" Vegeta's voice echoed back to his through the wood, causing the unexpected feel of need to increase tenfold. Biting back a sigh, the tall Saiyan pushed open the door, eyes widening as he took in the scene before him.

Vegeta lay back on the bed, back arched, sheets tangled about his legs and hands. The lithe body was flushed a bright pink, covered with a sheen layer of sweat.

* * *

**CENSORED** for lemon content! Go to profile for link to the chapter uncensored!

* * *

"Mmmph." Goku collapsed on top of his lover, surprisingly drained, threading fingers through the upswept flame of hair. He felt Vegeta's cheek rubbing against his, soft lips brushing his ear. "Th-Thank you, Kakarrot." A gentle kiss was pressed to his mouth, hot breath fanning over his face. "Thank you."

Goku eventually pulled from the loving embrace, staring down at his Prince with concern. "'Geta, you're so warm." He ran an experimental hand over heated flesh, carefully stroking his lover's side. "What's wrong? Are you sick?"

Vegeta shook his head in response, cheeks darkening further in obvious embarrassment. "No, I-" A sigh. "I am in heat, Kakarrot. My body is…not functioning properly."

The tall Saiyan cocked an eyebrow. "Heat?" he inquired, petting Vegeta's tail with worry. "What does that mean?"

"Saiyan males go into heat once every fifteen years or so." The Prince explained tiredly, eyes lidded with exhaustion. "It-It is nature's way of increasing our chances to reproduce. But my hormones don't work naturally, Kakarrot. It…hurts."

Eyes wide with concern, Goku placed an affectionate kiss to the smaller's cheek, blinking thoughtfully. "I-I think I remember being in heat a couple times. I would get really sweaty and stuff, so I'd just fight it off." He reached out through their bond, feeling the sadness and indecision in Vegeta's mind. "Wh-Why does it hurt?"

Vegeta swallowed audibly, seemingly forcing himself to stare Goku in the eye. "F-Frieza used to inject me with chemicals to keep me still. He usually w-wanted me to fight, but sometimes he-he wanted…submission." A single tear leaked down the smaller's cheek. "I think the drugs did s-something to my hormones. The heat is not supposed to be p-painful." Vegeta looked away, eyes squinted shut. "P-Please don't be disgusted, Kakarrot."

Goku blinked slowly in horror, not needing to touch upon Vegeta's thoughts to realize how badly the smaller Saiyan was hurting. "Of course I'm not." he reassured, still slightly weary from their most recent bout of passion. Wanting to spare Vegeta from further questioning yet needing to know more about his mate's current state, Goku continued the stroking of his lover's hair. "What makes the pain go away?" he inquired as unobtrusively as possible, listening closely.

Vegeta flushed an even darker shade of red, eyes affixed on some point above Goku's left shoulder. "I-I need to obtain release to keep from overheating." he explained quietly, ashamed. "But please don't worry about it, Kakarrot. It will only last for a week or so. I can…take care of it myself."

"No." Goku denied the offer, detachedly realizing how unaccustomed he was to doing such a thing. "I'm your mate, Vegeta. That's what I'm here for." He bent down, whispering into his lover's ear. "Just tell me, Vegeta. Whenever you need me to share love with you. Don't be ashamed." He gave a playful nip to his Prince's nose, smiling reassuringly. "I don't think I'll mind." Goku added quickly, a light blush gracing his cheeks.

--

Vegeta couldn't help but smile with relief, holding tightly to his mate's muscular arms, loving the way his porcelain flesh glowed in the dim light. "Thank you." he repeated, unable to keep his feelings of affection from echoing in his voice. Eyes traveling towards the door on a whim, he furrowed his brows when a brown bag met his gaze.

"Where were you this morning, Kakarrot?" he inquired, raising an eyebrow as he gazed at the object of his confusion. "What did you bring with you?"

"Oh yeah." He watched as Goku slid off of the bed, giving Vegeta a nice glimpse of his ass as he bent down to retrieve the sack. His larger mate glowed as he dumped the bag's contents onto the sheets, throwing the empty vessel to the side.

Vegeta's eyes widened. "Dragon balls?" He counted them quickly, staring up at his mate. "All seven? What for?"

Goku smiled, sincerity in his ebony orbs. "Well, I know that you're-that Frieza hurt you inside, 'Geta. I mean, I just thought that we could wish your pain away. You know, make your body right again." A pause. "Would you like that?"

A slight sense of fear seeped into Vegeta's every muscle. While he did feel a bit of relief at the prospect of being able to make love without the fear of pain, it was a bit…disconcerting to know that a trait of his body that he had lived with for so long was to simply disappear.

"I-I think so." He replied honestly. "Let's just get it over with. It won't make my heat go away, but I-I don't want to continue feeling this pain." He shifted uncomfortably, humiliated.

--

Goku cocked his head, feeling Vegeta's hesitance through their bond. "We don't have to." he offered, still confused as to the source of his lover's tentativeness. "I mean, we could save the balls for something else, or-" "No, Kakarrot." Vegeta put a silencing finger over his mate's lips. "I-I want it gone. I just-" He fell silent for a moment. _'I don't want to-to forget.'_

The larger Saiyan blinked, perplexed by the unsaid words. What did Vegeta want to keep in his memory? The rapes? Why would he want to remember such a horrible thing?

'_No.'_ Vegeta's voice echoed in his head once more, its owner staring up at him with glistening eyes. _'I mean, I don't want my memories touched, Kakarrot. I don't want to…forget about him.'_ An unprompted image of Raditz flashed through Goku's mind.

"Oh." Goku said aloud in understanding, unsure of how he was expected to feel. While it was a bit strange to imagine Vegeta being involved with his own brother, the shock was softened by the fact that he hadn't known Raditz for more than a few hours. It wasn't as if he had grown up with the guy.

''_Geta?' _The larger Saiyan touched hesitantly upon his lover's thoughts, eyes wide. "What was…were you and Raditz…" He couldn't bring himself to finish the question, afraid that Vegeta would lash out or attack him.

To his surprise, the small warrior didn't do either. Vegeta merely stared up at him, eyes dull and lidded, face unreadable. "You…did not know your brother, Kakarrot." he replied simply, staring down at the sheets, tail curled around his waist. "He-He was a Saiyan, a warrior, but not…cruel as you believe. Raditz…" A tear sparkled in the corner of Vegeta's eye. "He saved me, Kakarrot. I would not have my sanity today if he had not been there."

Goku leaned forward, running a careful hand over his Prince's bare shoulder. Sighing, he decided to speak his thoughts, eyes locking with Vegeta's. "You-You were lovers?"

Vegeta looked down at the sheets, tail trembling noticeably about the narrow waist. He took Goku's hand in his own, threading their fingers together in a gesture of trust and sincerity.

"Yes."

--

Sorry this chap took so long! Review?


	14. Wish

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop **

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, wife bashing (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, angst, graphic sex, MPREG (later), anything one can warn about.

Author's note (changes with chapter): Dun dun dun DUN! Some major stuff happens in this chapter, so try to keep your wits about you a bit. I'd warn you, but I don't wanna spoil it XP; Enjoy.

'_Text' _- Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

--

**Chapter 14: Wish?-**

Vegeta shivered in the night wind, allowing Goku to hold him close, eyes traveling up the starry sky above. He remembered when stars, planets would fizzle out at his hands, entire races reduced to dust with a single blast from his gloved palm. The Prince looked down at his bare hands, trembling noticeably. He was so cold.

He could only watch as Kakarrot poured the yellow balls, a gross green in the lack of light, onto the ground before them. A strong arm was wrapped around his shoulders. "Why don't you call him, 'Geta? You're always wanted to."

Eyes drifting shut, Vegeta shook his head from side to side, wanting nothing more than to get this particular experience over with. He bit his lip, confused by his own behavior. Why was he so frightened?

"N-No, Kakarrot." He instinctively pressed against his mate's side, holding onto him as if for dear life. "You call him. Please."

The larger Saiyan rubbed his arms with warm, strong hands, nodding in agreement. "All right." Kakarrot turned towards the balls, eyes shining like the stars above. "Shenron, arise and grant our wish!"

Watching as the sky around them darkened further, stars and half moon opaqued by tarry blackness, Vegeta clung tighter to his mate, a tear of frustration leaking from his right eye. The dragon seemed to appear in a matter of moments, an emerald-colored creature with ruby eyes fazing out of the night, hair tufts blowing in the soft winds.

"Hnn," the creature gave a deep grunt of annoyance as he realized who stood before him, eyes flashing. "Why have you summoned me? What is your wish?"

Vegeta couldn't help but jump slightly at the booming voice, vexed by his own actions. When had he turned into such a child? What had happened to the strong, Saiyan Prince who had crushed entire empires with a flick of his palm?

"Shenron," Goku addressed the dragon, giving a questioning glance to his mate. At Vegeta's shaky nod, the tall Saiyan turned back around, dark eyes set with determination. "I want you to restore Vegeta's inner body to the way it was before Frieza ever touched him." Vegeta shook slightly as he was embraced, Kakarrot's warm arms his only barrier from the freezing wind.

The dragon, seemingly glad that the process had gone quickly, nodded in affirmation at the request. Eyes sparkling with deepest crimson, it lowered its head, showing sharp fangs. "Your wish has been granted," it boomed out, causing another involuntary shake to ripple through the Prince. No sooner had the words left Shenron's mouth than Vegeta doubled over, hands clenched into fists, sharp shoots of pain stabbing through his stomach.

Teeth gritted, the Prince gripped his abdomen with shaking fingers, watching with blurred vision as the dragon faded out into the blackness. "'Geta!" His mate's voice rang in his ears, watery stabs of Kakarrot's confusion and worry leaking through their bond. Yelling out as agony coursed through his lower body, Vegeta yanked himself from Goku's embrace, staring down at his stomach through teary eyes. A gasp of shock leaving his lips, the Prince shook his head repeatedly, eyes squinted shut as he ran into the surrounding woods, swerving about aimlessly. No, it wasn't true. It couldn't be true…

Crying out, Vegeta continued his retreat into the forest, tears leaking down his cheeks, blood dripping from his lower lip. Kakarrot couldn't know. He couldn't find out. He couldn't.

Heavy sobs wracking the lithe body, the Prince of all Saiyans threw himself down at the side of the lake, face smacking ruthlessly into the ground as he trembled and sobbed. This was it. Any hope for Kakarrot's love was gone, reduced to dust.

He screamed.

--

"C'mon, open up." Goku ushered, tipping the cup of water between his Prince's lips, eyebrows raising as Vegeta unconsciously did as he asked. Smiling a little with relief, he poured the cool liquid down his mate's throat, holding up the smaller's head with a careful hand. He sighed, setting the cup aside, stoking Vegeta's cheek. GodS, what had happened last night? Why had his mate run from him like that?

Sighing, Goku placed a gentle kiss to royal lips, starting in surprise as lithe arms wrapped around his chest, pressing their bodies closer together. Thinking that his mate had woken, the tall Saiyan stared down at closed eyes, perplexed. What-

A hot tongue slipped inside of his mouth, plundering his own, licking impatiently at his lips. Kissing back as passionately as his confusion would allow, Goku forced his eyes back open, feeling his lover's hunger for contact. "Uh, 'G-'Geta?"

Ebony eyes snapped open, sparkling in recognition. Hardly a moment passed before the Prince rolled out from under him, holding his stomach in obvious pain as he snarled and glared, eyes teary.

"Vegeta," Goku reached out, only to have his hand pushed aside by a heavily shaking one. "What's wrong? Why did you run away last night?" His eyes traveled down to his mate's abdomen, which was being clutched by royal fingers. "Are-Are you sick?"

The Prince stopped all movement, face pale, eyes wide and shining. Slowly, as if he couldn't quite force his body to do what he wanted it to, Vegeta turned away and collapsed in a heap on the earth, body trembling, gentle sobs escaping the bloody lips.

Concerned beyond belief, Goku hurried over to the spot where Vegeta lay, kneeling beside the smaller body, placing a hand under his mate's chin. "'Geta?" he asked, turning the Prince's head to face him, watching as dark eyes gleamed with fear and hopelessness. "Please tell me what's wrong."

Before he could ponder his lover's actions further, a shaky, cold body was flung into his arms, its owner sobbing into his neck. "K-K-Kakar-rrot." Vegeta's voice was bruised, broken. "L-Let me be, Kakarrot. G-Go! P-Please!" Arms tightened weakly around his chest despite the commands to leave. "Y-You will not want me when you find out."

Goku held his mate close, Vegeta's sobs ragged in his ears. Taking a deep breath, the tall Saiyan shook his head, not knowing why in the world his Prince would think such a thing. Hadn't he made it clear that he was there for Vegeta no matter what?

"No, Vegeta. I will always want you," he insisted, feeling his mate's head shake weakly against his shoulder. "Please, tell me what's going on. Don't be afraid. I won't leave."

Hands going limp, the Prince pulled away from his body and slid down into a kneeling position, pain reflected in his eyes. "K-Kakarrot, I-" Vegeta took a shaky breath, face completely hopeless, body shaking as if he expected to be struck. "I-I'm pregnant."

Shocked, the tall Saiyan stared back at his lover, feeling the sincerity through their bond. P-pregnant? Was that possible? It must be, he figured, as he could see the truthfulness in Vegeta's eyes. But how? His lover was male. And they had only made love once…

"It isn't yours."

The Prince's voice echoed in his ears, bringing him back to reality, a look of intense surprise coming over the larger Saiyan's face. "S-Saiyan males can bear children, Kakarrot," the Prince explained miserably, staring at the ground. "I-It isn't yours. I'm-" A second of silence passed before Vegeta threw himself at Goku's feet, shaking.

"I-I wasn't thinking, Kakarrot! Th-The dragon…You asked it to restore my body to the way it was before Frieza took me!" He sobbed heavily, head bowed. "It-The infant is part of my body, Kakarrot! I-I was pregnant before Frieza ever laid a hand on me."

Goku, unable to hide his disbelief, simply stared back at the Prince, trying to comprehend everything the other was saying. Vegeta was really pregnant? They-they had accidentally wished back one of Vegeta's pregnancies from before?

"'Geta, please, calm down." He ran a hand through the damp flame of hair, trying to soothe his mate despite his own shock at the situation. "C'mon, let's get you home."

"No!" The Prince cried out in denial, head shaking violently back and forth. "Y-You don't understand, Kakarrot! I-I am pregnant with your brother's cub! It isn't yours!" Vegeta looked up at the taller Saiyan, eyes narrowed with pain and grief. "Just leave me al-"

Goku pressed down gently at the back of Vegeta's neck, causing the smaller Saiyan to fall forward into his arms, unconscious. Blinking solemnly at the fact that he had resorted to such measures, the tall Saiyan lifted the Prince up into his arms, holding him tightly. Running a hand over his mate's belly, Goku gazed down worriedly at Vegeta, pressing two fingers to his forehead.

--

"Dammit, Goku, what did he do to himself?"

The tall Saiyan lay Vegeta down on the bed, peeling off the grimy spandex shirt, blinking in confusion at his friend. "I dunno, Piccolo. I mean, he just ran off without saying anything. He looked really hurt." Goku intentionally left out the part about Vegeta being 'pregnant', not wanting to reveal anything his mate didn't want him to.

The Namek grunted, staring down at the unconscious Prince. "He's insane. I swear, Goku, it isn't safe to be involved with this guy."

Goku chuckled, running a hand freely through Vegeta's hair, not caring in the least that the Namek stood a mere few feet from the bed. "Maybe not, but I don't care. I-I love him, Piccolo. I won't leave him alone like this." He wiped the sweat from his lover's head, plopping carefully down next to the smaller Saiyan.

"Don't be a fool." The Namek looked down at Goku, an unconvinced gleam in his eyes. "I hate to rain on your parade, but he's unstable. You don't know what he'll do. It isn't safe to-"

"I don't care." Goku repeated simply, covering his mate in blankets, nuzzling the sleeping warrior's neck. "He's my mate. I won't leave him. Um…" he paused, glancing hopefully at the Namek. "Do-do you think you'd be able to not tell anyone about-about us, yet? I-I don't want 'Geta getting attacked."

Piccolo raised a hairless brow. "Goku, do I look like the kind of person who goes around gossiping everywhere?" He crossed his arms, obviously annoyed.

Goku smiled, understanding the answer to his question. "Thanks."

--

It was hot. Too hot. Blazing hot. Vegeta turned and thrashed beneath the covers, eyes snapping open, sweat stinging them. Snarling as he registered his surroundings, the Prince sat up quickly in bed and tossed the covers off, Kakarrot's scent filling his nostrils. The stupid baka had brought him back.

Groaning out in dismay, Vegeta forced himself to stand, stomach aching terribly as he staggered out into the hallway. Hide. He had to hide.

Any remaining shreds of Prince burnt to ash, Vegeta turned and ran off towards the bathroom, slipping inside and locking the door childishly, despite the fact that Goku could get in with a tiny exertion of strength. Sobbing to himself, the lithe Saiyan lowered himself into the corner, head in his hands, eyes squinted shut. His stomach throbbed.

--

"'Geta?" Goku called out softly, entering the bedroom with a tray of food, eyes widening as he stared towards the empty bed. Panic rising up in his chest, the tall Saiyan quickly set the tray on the bedside table and looked around worriedly, eyes darting back and forth. Where had Vegeta gone? Was he okay?

Reaching through their bond and finding himself abruptly shut out, Goku swallowed nervously, searching for Vegeta's ki. Spotting it in the bathroom, the tall Saiyan shook his head slightly, saddened. Why was Vegeta hiding from him like this?

Gulping, he padded down the hallway and stopped in front of the bathroom door, twisting the knob experimentally. Sighing, he called out through the wood, wanting, needing Vegeta to hear him.

"Vegeta…"

--

XP Short and sweet.


	15. Give

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop **

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, wife bashing (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, angst, graphic sex, MPREG (later), anything one can warn about.

Author's note (changes with chapter): Yes, I've done it. I've finally added the MPREG XP; Hope it doesn't turn anyone off from my fic. I'm rather new to it as well XD. Ohh, and for those of you who've been getting sick of all the depression, get ready for some COMIC RELIEF (a.k.a. ridiculous/horny/dramatic Goku XD). Enjoy.

'_Text' _- Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

--

**Chapter 15: Give-**

Vegeta sighed, shaking his head back and forth, gulping down his tears. Shoulders cold against the wall, he forced his eyes open, breathing in the scent of the other Saiyan, hearing his mate's voice call out from behind the door. "Vegeta," it begged, sadness obvious in the soft tone. "Please let me in."

Inhaling shakily, the Prince forced himself to his feet, gazing down at his stomach, placing a gloved hand over it. He had to try to stay calm, if only for the cub's sake. For Raditz' sake. Gulping, Vegeta stepped shakily to the door and pulled it open, eyes locking onto Goku's, face flushed with exhaustion and pain.

"Kakarrot." He had to steel himself from falling into the larger Saiyan's arms, biting his lip, blood dripping down his throat. Unable to speak further, he slumped back against the sink, head hung, aches throbbing through his muscles.

--

Goku blinked, tears falling down his cheeks, dripping onto the blue floor below. Oh, there was so much he needed to know, so much to ask. But he couldn't. He simply couldn't bring himself to open his mouth and risk ruining any composure his mate had managed to retain.

Taking a deep breath, Goku took a slow stride towards the Prince, sliding gentle hands around his lover's body. Lips closed and eyes shut, he held Vegeta tightly against him, sending warm waves of ki into the cold vessel, trembling as he held on for dear love. Cheek rubbing tenderly against his mate's, the tall Saiyan reached out delicately to Vegeta's mind, transmitting his love, eyes watering in worry.

"B-bed." The raspy voice rung in his ears, shredding the veil of silence between them, causing the taller Saiyan's eyes to drift open. Pulling away just far enough to stare down into his lover's eyes, Goku nodded in understanding, carefully lifting Vegeta into his arms, stepping softly down the hall towards their shared bedroom. Bottom lip clasped between his teeth, Goku carefully lowered his Prince onto the bed, pulling the comforter over his mate's shivering body. "A-are you warm enough?"

The weak nod sent shots of concern straight into his heart. Kneeling down next to his mate, the larger warrior slid under the sheets alongside Vegeta, extending a hand. He rested it experimentally on the other's belly, rubbing it carefully in an attempt to soothe. "'Geta," Goku sighed, staring lovingly into the Prince's eyes. "Th-the baby, 'Geta. Are you sure you can…handle it?"

Goku could only watch as Vegeta turned his head, staring him in the face, eyes gleaming in the low light. "Kaka," he whispered, leaning against the larger Saiyan, hands running over his abdomen. "I-I have spent my entire existence taking life, Kakarrot. It's about time I gave it."

--

(2 months later)

--

"Damn it, Kakarrot, stop that!" Vegeta snarled in annoyance, turning around to cuff his mate roughly on the shoulder. "I am not some sort of food!"

Goku chuckled happily, wrapping arms around the slightly extended stomach, reluctantly stopping his licking of the Prince's neck. "Aww, sorry 'Geta," he apologized softly, feeling the growl soften in his lover's throat. "But you taste so good." He gave another sultry lick, blushing.

Vegeta narrowed his eyes, grocery bags swinging back over his shoulder. "I don't care!" he scoffed under his breath, face flushed and arms crossed. "We're done shopping. Let's just go home." The smaller Saiyan cocked an eyebrow, obviously sensing Goku's lust through their bond. "Calm down!"

Bashfully removing his tongue once more from the bronze flesh, the tall Saiyan took his lover's hand tenderly, pressing two fingers to his forehead. Reappearing seconds later in their kitchen, he watched as Vegeta set the plastic bags on the counter, leaning back against it.

"Gha…shit…" The Prince held his stomach, head thrown back in pain. "Damn cub won't give me any peace." He affixed Goku with an irritated gaze. "Feeding the thing is going to be hell. You third-classes and your appetites."

Goku moved slowly behind his mate, warmed ki running from his fingertips into the extended belly. "My brother was a third class?" he asked in surprise, kissing the smaller's neck affectionately. "I thought he might have had a different mother."

"Mmmph," Vegeta leaned back against him, head resting on Goku's shoulder. "He may have, I'm not sure. But he was a third class, I know that much." The Prince melted in his mate's arms, eyes flashing with a spark of thoughtfulness. "And I ended up with the least Saiyan member of my race. If I could have seen myself now..."

Goku's face fell as he rubbed the tense muscles, expecting to hear some sort of criticism fall from his lover's lips. Only when Vegeta slid a hand into his hair did was tall Saiyan able to look down into the other's face. He watched the regal eyes stare back into his own, a rare smile quirking his mate's mouth. "If only I had been this lucky back then." The Prince chuckled at his lover's look of surprise. "I suppose you've rubbed off on me, baka."

The tall Saiyan glowed, tail wrapping around the smaller waist, lips descending upon his lover's. Although Vegeta had loosened up noticeably since the beginning of their relationship, it wasn't every day he heard such affectionate words from his mate. "'Geta," he whispered lovingly, holding the Prince's stomach, overwhelmed by happiness and awe. "I-I can't believe it, 'Geta. You're gonna have our cub." He tightened his hold defensively, radiating love. It didn't matter that the tiny being inside his mate wasn't technically his own. He loved it just as much as he would have had it been a product of his own body.

Vegeta participated for a few moments before squirming, forcing himself from the other's grasp. "You've known for two months, baka," he chastised, dark eyes betraying the Prince's own happiness. "Go ahead and put the food away. I'm going to take a shower."

Brightening noticeably at the prospect, Goku hurriedly slid the packages of food into the refrigerator, padding excitedly down the hallway, only to find that his lover had already turned the shower on. Waves of steam drifted out the slightly open door. Grinning, he slipped quickly into the bathroom, divesting himself of his pants and climbing in alongside his smaller mate.

"Any dinner requests?" he purred in question, running lathered fingers through Vegeta's hair. "It's getting pretty late. I thought you'd want something to eat." The Prince shifted under his touch, leaning back against him, a soft purr rumbling in the smaller chest. "Mmm, yes. Get me some of those fried things that you made last week." Vegeta's eyes drifted shut as his scalp was stroked. "And some chocolate, if there's any left."

Goku chuckled out loud, water trailing down over his head and face. "Okay," he agreed, sliding gentle hands down to caress strong thighs. A haze of embarrassed lust covered his cheeks as he looked over the hard chest, the powerful arms, openly appreciating his lover's body. "Uh, 'Geta?" he asked tentatively, half expecting to be shouted at. "Do you think you'll, um, have any energy left after dinner?" The tall Saiyan could only watch as his lover turned around in his arms, staring up at him with a perturbed glace.

"Horny bastard." Vegeta chuckled slightly, reaching up to cup his lover's face. "I'll tell you what. I may stay awake for a few more hours," he paused, sliding a hand up teasingly to clutch his mate's ass. "If you promise not to be so gentle this time."

Eyes widening to a rather comical size, Goku had no time to respond in any way before he was roughly shoved out of the shower, falling unceremoniously to the floor below. Surprised, he glanced up at his smirking mate, face flushed a spectacular shade of red. "Go," Vegeta commanded, arms crossed and eyes lidded. "Make me some food, Kakarrot. We'll talk later."

Cheeks pink, Goku nodded in agreement and left the room, a grin plastered over his face.

--

"Mmmph, Kaka…" Vegeta leaned forward against his lover, cheek sliding against Goku's, creamy essence dripping down over his chest. He pressed an exhausted kiss to the larger Saiyan's lips, panting heavily as a slicked hand made its way over his abdomen. "Gha…you never stop, do you?"

A warm tongue licked at his neck, confirming his suspicions. "Nope," Goku's voice whispered into his ear, his mate's smile obvious in the loving tone. "I could make love to you all the time."

Vegeta chuckled, rolling his eyes, stretching out tiredly over his lover. "Let's thank the gods you can't, Kakarrot," he sighed, relinquishing the breath he had left. "It's hard enough to walk with this damn cub inside me."

Goku cocked his head, obviously confused. "Huh?" Vegeta smiled, head buried in his mate's chest. _'Nothing.'_ Moments passed before sleep claimed the Prince's thoughts, Vegeta going boneless in the strong embrace, leaving his perplexed mate alone in the darkness.

--

"Go to hell!"

"You sick pervert, what are you trying to do?!"

Goku woke slowly to the sounds of shouting, puzzled by the lack of a warm body in his arms. Eyes drifting open, the tall Saiyan felt about for his lover in the sheets, ears assaulted once again by loud yells.

"Who are you to say what's sick, you three eyed freak?!"

"H-huh?" Goku slid out of bed, still foggy with sleep as he padded sleepily down the hallway. Vegeta's voice ringing in his ears, he approached the living room and came face to face with a hissing, infuriated Prince, clenched fist inches away from one of the tall Saiyan's long-time friends.

"Tien?" he asked in confusion, watching three eyes dart over to him. The other's expression went from angry to shocked in a matter of moments. "Goku! What's this bastard trying to do to you, man?"

Goku blinked drowsily, thoroughly perplexed by the situation. "Um, you mean 'Geta? H-he's not doing anything." A streak of anger shot through him at Tien's words. "He's not a bastard. What are you talking about?" The larger Saiyan ran a confused hand through his sleep-mussed hair, fully unaware of his nakedness.

His friend blinked in a similar state of shock, face going red. "Oh my god, don't-you're not fucking him, are you?!" Tien gasped out loud, looking back and forth between Goku and the enraged Prince. "That's disgusting! He's corrupted you with his twisted mind, Goku! Get away from him!"

"No!" Goku placed strong arms around Vegeta's stomach, suddenly livid. "He hasn't done anything wrong! Leave 'Geta alone!" A strong hand swatted at the side of his head, causing his grip to loosen. "Dammit, Kakarrot, I don't need your help!" Dark eyes gleamed up angrily at him. "Let me handle this!"

"See?" Tien's eyes were narrowed as he looked at the Prince, an instinctive growl building in Goku's throat at the sight. "He doesn't want you! The whore just wants to be fucked!"

Vegeta lunged forward, body shaking with rage. "You hideous bastard! Fuck you and your weak-ahh!" Goku had no time to intervene before the Prince fell back on the floors before him, head smacking ruthlessly into the tile, eyes squinted shut in pain. A large, red spot blossomed over his slightly extended stomach.

Eyes trailing up towards his past companion, Goku blinked slowly in shock, observing the extended fist with horror. "'Geta!" he screamed out, kneeling down beside his shaking mate, cradling the smaller body in his arms. "What did you do to him?! What's wrong with you?!"

The triclops crossed his arms, looking down at the trembling Vegeta. "How could you let him control you like that? He's turned into a weakling." Three eyes wandered down the Prince's bare thigh, widening slightly in undisguised amusement. "Hey Vegeta, nice tattoo. What's the 'F' stand for?"

Goku had no time to think before he found himself on the ground outside, Tien screaming below him as he punched and smacked the other viciously, spatters of the other's blood sprinkled over his face. "Shut up!" he snarled, smashing a fist into the elder's forearm, the sound of snapping bones crackling in his ears. "You bastard! Don't you dare talk about my mate!"

Tien screamed out in agony, tossing his head from side to side as he was beaten. The Saiyan grunted, eventually managing to cool off somewhat, head clearing. Taking a deep breath, he grasped the triclops by the shirt and stood, arm swinging as he tossed the other into the sky. Without another word, Goku turned back towards the house, feeling smaller arms envelop him tightly.

"Kakarrot," his mate's voice whispered shakily into his ear, a lithe body pressing gratefully against his. "I-I'm sorry, Kaka. Thank you."

The tall Saiyan smiled, running a gentle hand over the flushed stomach. "Of course," he breathed out, brows furrowed with concern. "Did he hurt you? Are you okay?" He helped his smaller mate back into the house, shutting the front door behind him.

Vegeta sat down shakily in the nearest chair, rubbing his abdomen. "I've been better. Your bastard friend doesn't know when to quit." The Prince gave an amused chuckle, staring at the blood on Goku's hands and face. "And I thought you didn't act Saiyan. I stand corrected."

Goku grinned, giving a gentle lick to his lover's throat. "You've rubbed off on me."

--

O.O;; Cutsie enough? XP


	16. Strength

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop **

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, wife bashing (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, angst, graphic sex, MPREG (later), anything one can warn about.

Author's note (changes with chapter): Well, it's back to the angst here, people. Oh c'mon, it's me. You didn't really expect the fluff to continue, did you? -grins- But a bit of sappy sweetness in the beginning. I felt generous today ;3.

'_Text' _- Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

--

**Chapter 16: Strength -**

Goku awoke the next morning to the familiar sounds of his mate vomiting raggedly down the toilet. Sighing with concern, he gently slid out of bed and padded sleepily into the bathroom, staring down at his prostrate lover. He knelt down beside the shaking Vegeta, wrapping strong arms softly around the lithe torso. "Shhh." Goku rubbed his mate's back soothingly, channeling waves of warm ki into the tense muscles. He caressed the bronze flesh, tracing the many scars lovingly.

The taller warrior watched in worry as his smaller Prince shook slightly in his grasp, leaning back weakly against his chest, head resting on his shoulder. "Ghaa…Kakarrot," Vegeta choked out, face tinted a sickly blue as he leaned forward once again, emptying his stomach into the bowl. "Ngrh, disgusting," the smaller spat out, shaking his head in embarrassment, slamming down the toilet seat and resting his head upon the lid. "How do you put up with me?"

"Because I love you," Goku said simply, watching the other rise shakily to his feet. "I don't want you to be sick. Can you walk this morning?"

Vegeta grunted, eyes narrowing in pain as he placed both hands over his stomach. "I can always walk, Kakarrot," he replied, hair tousled from their most recent bout of passion. "But you and your damn appetites certainly don't make it any easier." He winced, a muscle pulling in his leg as he tried to turn around.

"'Geta, don't force yourself," he ushered softly, pressing up against his smaller Prince's back. Goku ran his hands softly over the extended stomach, rubbing it carefully, feeling the tiny cub move beneath his fingers. "He's probably just hungry," he smiled, taking a smaller hand within his own. "Wanna go get some breakfast? I'll cook."

Vegeta went limp in his arms, following his lead down the hall as strong fingers threaded with his own. "Mmm, waste of time," the Prince coughed out, leaning back tiredly against the counter. "Damn cub's been keeping me up all night. I doubt I'll be able to hold anything down."

Goku shrugged, sliding a pan onto the stove. "Doesn't matter, you should still eat." Smiling, he wrapped two arms around the extended belly, rubbing gently. "Um, by the way, Trunks called me earlier. He said he was gonna come over and spar with me." The tall Saiyan paused, eyes wide. "Do you think you'll be able to be without me for a few hours, or should I cancel? I can stay if you think you need me."

Vegeta snorted, arms crossed over the muscled chest. "Hn, if you think I'm that useless then I have no idea why you mated me in the first place, Kakarrot." The lithe Saiyan pulled from Goku's embrace, eyes narrowed in annoyance and exhaustion. "Just make me some bacon. You can go get your sparring in once I'm fed. At least one of us should be useful around here."

Giving a little smile, Goku turned back to the stove and tore off a slab of meat, eyes glinting with happiness.

--

"Pregnant?!" Trunks froze in mid-kick, blue eyes widened to an almost comical size. "A-are you serious?! Two months?"

Goku wiped the sweat from his brow, grinning at the two shocked demis. "Yup, that's right. He's got about four months left until he gives birth. We're gonna name it after him!" The Saiyan smiled in pure joy, chuckling at the disbelieving gazes he was being given.

"Uh, Dad?" his younger son ran a hand through similar spikes, dark eyes wide with confusion. "So that's an, um, a Saiyan thing, right?" Goten cocked a brow, expression nearly identical to his father's usual one. "I mean, there's-he's really gonna have a baby?"

"Uh huh!" The eldest Saiyan beamed, eyes alight with happiness. "Well, technically it's not mine. I mean, we tried to wish his body back to the way it used to be, but we accidentally wished back a cub he lost before. It's…complicated." Giggling, Goku placed a hand behind his head, shrugging.

Trunks hovered backwards slightly, obviously shocked beyond words. "Um, o-okay," the teen finally managed to choke out. "I'm happy for you, I guess. I mean, it's-it's just weird to think I'm gonna have a little brother." He paused, head cocked. "You did say it was going to be male, right?"

"'Geta says he thinks it will be," Goku nodded in affirmation. "Something about the ki being different from a girl's, I think."

"That's right."

Starting in surprise, the tall Saiyan turned around, coming face to face with a very amused-looking Prince. Vegeta chuckled, eyeing the teenagers in obvious entertainment. "I see you've broken the news, Kakarrot. Perhaps we should have told them earlier. I fear you've frightened them for life."

"Dad!" Trunks hovered up quickly to his father, eyes still large. "Whoa, you've gotten bigger."

"I'm aware of that." Vegeta rolled his eyes, hands fisting at his sides. "Whatever, we can discuss this later. I want a spar, and I want it now." He placed his fists out before him, legs parting in his customary stance.

Goku blinked in surprise, placing a hand tentatively on the other's shoulder. "Are you sure you can?" he asked, half expecting to have his extended arm snapped off by the gleam in his warrior Prince's eye. "I mean, you're fighting for two, you know."

Vegeta sighed, resting a gloved hand on his abdomen. "I will be fine. I'm feeling a hell of a lot better than I have been lately, and I'll be damned if I stay still all the time because of the damn cub." He softened his voice, staring up at Goku. "Just no hits to the stomach. I-I don't want him hurt."

"Of course not," the taller replied, biting his lip in indecision. He didn't want to keep Vegeta shut up in the house all the time, and it wasn't like he could stop the other from doing what he wanted. "I guess it would be all right. But make sure you don't exert yourself, I don't want either of you getting injured." He rested a hand on the swollen belly, only to have it pushed quickly away.

"I need the exercise," Vegeta muttered, stepping back into his previous stance. "Let's just start, I'm sick of waiting." Giving a nod to the two boys, Goku stepped back and waited, expecting his always-fiery Prince to attack first.

He wasn't disappointed. Dodging the surprisingly quick punches and smacks, Goku launched a reluctant kick towards the smaller's chest, watching as he leg was blocked and tossed aside. "You'll have to do better than that," Vegeta narrowed his eyes, fists clenched out in front of his as he flared into super Saiyan. Green eyes gleamed with undisguised battle hunger. "I don't need your…" Goku watched in confusion as the smaller chest heaved, golden locks coming closer into view as Vegeta's head dropped. "Your…"

The tall Saiyan had no time to react before Vegeta fell forward, lithe body falling limply to the ground. Lips parting, Goku kneeled quickly to the ground, hands cupping the smaller's face. "'Geta!" he gasped out in shock, feverishly feeling for a pulse, bending down over his mate in concern. Gosh, that didn't seem right. Had he hurt Vegeta? The Prince had seemed perfectly fine just moments before.

Confused, Goku turned back to the two boys, shrugging slowly. "I-I dunno what happened. He never just faints like that. I wonder if-"

The larger Saiyan stopped midsentence as a sharp slap was cracked across his face, leaving him shocked and stinging. Glancing down at Vegeta in surprise, Goku watched the smaller body shake and thrash beneath him, gloved fingers digging into the flesh of his arms.

"D-don't you dare!" The Prince sobbed out, eyes still squinted shut as crystal tears dripped down his cheeks. "He's mine, you bastard! G-go fuck yourself, you heartless freak!"

Goku blinked slowly in confusion, wildly wondering what he had done to deserve such words. "Shh, Vegeta, wh-what did I do?" he asked, feeling strong legs kick frantically at him. Lip bit between his teeth, the younger warrior grasped Vegeta's wrists, slowly pinning him to the ground. Suddenly realizing that the other hadn't yet opened his eyes, Goku cocked a brow and leaned down, whispering soothingly into the smaller's ear. "Shh, you're just dreaming," he reassured, unable to think up any other explanation for Vegeta's behavior. "It's all right. Everything's all-"

"Nngh!" The smaller body thrashed violently beneath him, fists clenched and punching at every inch of Goku they could reach. Hand sparkling with ki, Vegeta snarled in an incredibly animalistic manner and smacked his lover over the face a second time, leaving Goku's face raw and bloody on one side. "Get away from me! I hate you!" Tears ran from closed eyes.

"Dad!" Goten rushed up behind the elder Saiyan, staring down in shock as his father held Vegeta down. "What is he doing to you? I thought you were mates!"

Goku sighed, yelping as a gloved fist smacked him roughly on the side of his face. Unable to respond vocally to his son's question, the taller Saiyan quickly fell to the side, ribs throbbing as he tried to recover from the vicious blow. "V-V'geta," he choked out, breathing hard, crawling shakily back over to his Prince. Eyes stinging with moisture, Goku leaned down and pressed his cheek against a trembling one, all sense leaving him as he sighed out from pain. "Wh-why are you doing this to me? What's going through your head?" He tried to reach out mentally, finding himself abruptly shut out. Goku slowly pulled away, slightly relieved that the blows had stopped. Blood dripped down his neck and chest.

Deaf to the shouts of shock from both younger boys, the tall Saiyan simply stared down at the pale face, noting with concern the contorted pain in Vegeta's features, the look of hopelessness. He sighed, half wishing the other was still throwing punches at him. His mate appeared to have given up from whatever he had been trying to fight off.

Staring, Goku watched emerald eyes slowly flutter open, glossy orbs sparkling with recognition. Giving a concerned smile, the tall Saiyan looked back into Vegeta's face, silent. Blinking, he ran a hand along his lover's cheek, his own blood trickling down between both of their bodies. "Is-is everything okay?" he asked softly, head cocked slightly to the side. He threaded his fingers into golden strands, only to have them turn black beneath his hands. "What happened?"

Vegeta quivered noticeably in his gentle grasp, lips parted and eyes large. "K-Kakarrot," he choked out, tears running afresh down his cheeks as he stared at the bloody countenance. Shaking violently, the Prince brought trembling hands up to his face, white cheeks going a sickly blue as he ran his gaze over his bloodstained fingers. Gulping audibly, the smaller Saiyan looked back up at his mate, eyes alit with disbelief. "I-I did this. I hurt you."

Goku looked back, shaking his head. "Well, I mean, yeah. But you were asleep, you didn't know what you were doing." He reached out to touch Vegeta's face, feeling cool flesh shiver beneath his hand. "What happened, 'Geta? Is our cub all right?"

A blur dancing across Goku's vision, the tall Saiyan thudded quickly to the ground, ribs protesting as a muscled body slid out from underneath his own. Groaning, the tall Saiyan hoisted himself from the ground, standing shakily. "I-where'd he go?" he looked around aimlessly, glancing back at the two boys. "Did you see him?"

Trunks looked back in concern, blue eyes sad. "He's gone," he said simply, leaning slightly against his friend. "What was that about? Why was he saying those things to you?"

Not in the mood to discuss what had just gone on, Goku simply shrugged, questions floating about in his head. "He was asleep," he said simply, not caring to explain his thoughts on the matter. Hovering up into the air, the tall Saiyan tried to pinpoint his mate's ki, looking left and right. It was no use. He was hiding.

Concerned for the life of both his mate and his cub, Goku gave a departing glance to the two demis, speeding off over the mass of trees. He had to find him. He didn't know what Vegeta would do to himself in such a condition. If the Prince had been imagining what he expected the other had, he wasn't all that surprised that his mate had fled. Goku sighed, cursing. There wasn't punishment enough for that bastard Frieza.

Sobbing softly, the galaxy's strongest warrior went off in search of his mate, tears leaking from his eyes.

--

Vegeta rocked back and forth on the ground, leaves crackling beneath his skin as he whimpered and shook. "I hurt him," he choked out, whispering softly to himself. "I hurt Kakarrot. I hurt him. I hurt Kakarrot." Bringing quivering fingers up to his face, Vegeta placed his head into bloody hands, head shaking back and forth in denial. He wasn't Frieza. He couldn't be.

Falling weakly to the side, the Prince allowed himself to lay weakly against the forest floor, lips moving wordlessly. Kakarrot didn't deserve this. His mate didn't deserve to be put through this sort of Hell.

Dark eyes gleaming with restraint, Vegeta forced himself to stand up, head hung as he gazed down to the Earth. Earth, the planet he had grown to love. The place he had planned to build a family with the strong Saiyan of his dreams. He shut his eyes, breathing in the planet's scent. He would miss it.

Shaking, Vegeta hovered into the air and took off, Kakarrot's voice echoing through his thoughts.

--

;-;


	17. Deny

**Letting Go**

by **icypinkpop**

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, wife bashing (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, angst, graphic sex, MPREG (later), anything one can warn about.

Author's note (changes with chapter): Sap. -speechless-

'Text' - Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

--

**Chapter 17: Deny** –

Vegeta stared down miserably at the ship's control panel, giving Capsule Corporation a final, departing glance. Slowly, painfully, he dragged his bloody fingers over the keys, plotting in a random coordinate for a planet he didn't know the name of and had likely annihilated himself. He furrowed his brow, hands shaking. It didn't matter where he was going. As long as he was away from Kakarrot, he could spend his entire life tumbling about in space.

Nobody would miss him.

"K-Kakarrot," he choked out, forcing the tears back, head hung as he traced the tiles of the floor with dark, watery eyes. The man had been his single hope, his one desire for years. He had finally gotten the one thing he had always wanted.

And he just had to go and fuck it up.

Staring down wretchedly at his booted feet, Vegeta ran bloodied hands shakily through his hair, eyes drifting shut. "I-I'm sorry, Kakarrot," he apologized, voice barely a whisper. "I'm so sorry."

"Really?"

Tail puffing out in startled shock, Vegeta stiffened, unable to gather the strength to turn around. Gulping back his fear, he listened to the firm voice echo about the spaceship's steel walls, muscles cold and unmoving. Was that really…Kakarrot's voice?

Head fuzzy as if he was in a dream, the Prince forced himself to look back over his shoulder, body following suit as he turned back to face his mate. Dark eyes gleamed intensely back at him, sending a surprised shiver through his smaller form. He couldn't remember the last time Kakarrot had given him that look. Not since they had been true enemies, at least.

"Vegeta," the taller Saiyan said quietly yet firmly, taking a step forward, sliding strong hands under the Prince's neck. Vegeta shivered as his face was cupped, eyes darting back and forth in fear. "Look at me."

Trembling as his mate stared down into his visage, the smaller Saiyan gulped and followed orders, thoroughly chilled by the serious tone. He could only watch as that handsome face came down to his level, eyes dark and shining, a single tear leaking down the fair-skinned cheek.

"You can't do this, Vegeta," Goku said softly, hands still holding the Prince's head. "Y-you just can't. Why do you want to leave me?"

Vegeta shook in the grasp, unable to look away, to tear from the grasp. Throat clenching, he forced the first words to leave his lips, confused and terrified. He had seen the man before him tear enemies limb from limb with a flick of his wrist.

"I-I don't want to," he stuttered honestly, staring regretfully at the bloody visage, the dark swelling around his lover's right eye. "I h-hurt you. I-"

"I don't care." Goku cut him off, voice firm and deep, eyes glimmering almost dangerously. "Vegeta, don't you understand? Don't you realize-"

Head suddenly released from the firm grip, Vegeta watched his mate stumble backwards, the larger body trembling. "D-don't you realize how much I love you?" Tears flowed freely down the pale face, dark eyes wide and affixed on the floors below. "How could y-you just leave me like this, Vegeta? D-don't you care about me at all?"

"Of course I do!" he said louder than intended, hot tears of his own now falling quickly down bronzed cheeks. "I can't stay, Kakarrot! I'm just like him! I'm just like Frieza!" He punched weakly as the nearest wall, fist throbbing as the sound of collapsing metal rang out through the sterile air. "I-I'll kill you, Kakarrot! I can't let myself do that!"

Goku gripped his forearms tightly, dark eyes large and shining. "You're not Frieza!" the taller insisted, head shaking vigorously back and forth. "When are you gonna get it through your head, Vegeta? I love you! There's nothing wrong with you! Why can't you understand that?" A gentle sob met the Prince's ears, sending shoots of pain directly into the smaller Saiyan's heart.

Eyes wide in disbelief, Vegeta stared up into deep black orbs, feeling stabs of emotional agony permeate the bond between himself and his chosen. He choked on the insufferable sadness, lips parting as he swallowed a whimper.

"I-" Vegeta fell silent, shocked beyond words. Kakarrot wasn't angry? The other Saiyan really cared enough to beg him to stay? He hadn't realized just how much his lover-

"How could you?!" Goku asked suddenly, still not meeting the Prince's eyes. "Y-you're gonna have our baby, Vegeta! What did I d-do wrong? Wh-what did I-"

"Kakarrot." Vegeta strode quickly forward, gripping his lover's face with a strong hand, staring up into Goku's wide, leaking ebony orbs. "I-I'm so sorry, Kakarrot," he said earnestly, meaning every syllable of each word, gulping as he slid cold fingers over his mate's firm jaw. "I didn't realize. I-I thought you'd be a-angry. And the-the cub isn't yours…"

Goku slowly shook his head, tears running freely down his face and neck, cold moisture trickling slowly down his lover's forearms. Seemingly speechless, the strongest being of the universe pressed shakily closer, burying his head into the Prince's smaller chest, eyes squinted shut as he sobbed softly. "Please don't leave me," the gentle voice rang in Vegeta's ears, sending a soft shiver up the smaller's spine. "I-I can't be without you, Vegeta. I don't care about your past, I-I just want us to spend our future together." A shaky sigh. "I love you."

Touched by the true sincerity, Vegeta ran gloved fingers through his lover's silken locks, bending down to look Goku deeply in the eye. "I love you too, Kakarrot," he gulped back a whimper, lips trembling. "P-please forgive me. I-I didn't…"

Giving up on his traitorous words, the smaller Prince fell limply into his mate's grasp, clinging to the porcelain flesh for dear life, for dear sanity. For dear love.

"I love you," he choked out again, feeling strong arms lock safely around him, dispelling the cold shroud of hopelessness that had descended over Vegeta's heart. He felt the acceptance in Kakarrot's grasp, the concern. His crescent wound tingled with the bond that attached him to the strong Saiyan warrior he had taken as his mate.

He couldn't believe it. Goku had forgiven him.

Sobbing gently against the warm body in his arms, the Prince leaned forward as a strong hand slid between their bodies, rubbing carefully at his extended belly. "Shh, we shouldn't disturb him," soft lips whispered against his neck, hot breath tingling over the delicate flesh. "Everything's fine, it's all right. I'm sorry I upset you. I didn't mean to."

Vegeta pulled back just enough to look his lover in the eyes, placing a loving hand on his savior's cheek. "I-mmm," he sighed out, too tired to speak, far too choked up to force out any intelligent words. Surrendering willingly for the first time in his life, the Prince nodded in agreement, taking a deep breath. There would be time for words later. Right now, this moment was all that mattered.

Leaning up towards his lover's handsome face, the smaller warrior gave a gentle cry and pressed his lips softly against the ones that tempted him, licking lovingly at Goku's mouth and chin. "Kaka," he sighed, overcome with emotion as he slid his tongue between smooth petals. "M-mmm…"

"Love," Kakarrot's hot breath whispered over the delicate flesh of his neck, only serving to increase his need for comfort, for security. He-he needed his mate, he admitted silently, gloved hands gripping tightly onto satin shoulders, holding the larger body close against his own.

Unable to focus on anything but his lover's gentle touch, Vegeta wrapped his leg around an orange-clad thigh, body shaking as intense waves of-of feeling radiated between their minds, hands gripping and pulling wantonly at clothes and flesh. Eyes squinted shut, the Prince slowly stretched backwards over the control panel, pulling the larger warrior over between his legs, ravishing the hot mouth with his own. Feeling a sudden lurch beneath his trembling form, he broke off from the temping lips and yelled out in shock, face smacking hardly into the metal walls, head spinning deliriously as he was pushed forcibly from Goku's body.

Confused beyond all matter, the Prince forced his eyes open, stomach lurching as his cheek was smashed viciously against the side of the control panel. Gagging in nausea, he stared up shakily at the multicolored buttons, body still sweeping from wall to wall as the ship continued its ascent into the air.

Vegeta widened his eyes in realization as he was once again thrown against the panel, hand sweeping quickly up to drag over the keyboard in desperation. Fingers finding the blinking red button just in time, the Prince yelled out as a larger body collided with his own, breath knocked out of his body.

Eyes shut as the air rushed quickly around him, the Prince threw himself back against the wall, barely aware of what was going on as the ship smashed hard into the earth below, head swimming, leg twisted uncomfortably over him.

Grunting as the wave of nausea passed, Vegeta opened his eyes drearily, gaze focusing in on the sight before him. Confronted with a similar expression from his lover, the Prince glanced down, only to realize exactly how awkward a position the brief ordeal had left him in.

His booted foot had somehow found its way up through the other's shirt, poking out the neck-hole alongside Goku's head. Kakarrot's pants had been swept down about the other's ankles, the twisted blue sash hanging limply over Goku's left shoulder. One of his gloves lay alone over the control panel.

Half-sitting on his lover's bare thigh, Vegeta gave a final glace down at his half-dressed mate before bursting out into peals of laughter, eyes watering as he fell backwards over the metal floors. He howled out loudly in hilarity, holding his stomach as he tore his trapped foot from the other's gi, leaving his mate completely naked.

"K-Kakarrot!" he choked out, lips twisted into a wide grin, forcing himself into a sitting position. Lip bit as he tried to swallow back a laugh, Vegeta shook his head, eyeing his lover's blushing visage with extreme amusement. Still chuckling, the Prince let himself fall limply over the larger body, feeling satin skin slide beneath his own, lithe muscles shaking with laughter. "Y-you are priceless," he breathed, nuzzling the pale neck, nipping at the shell of Goku's ear.

Goku waited a few seconds before beginning to laugh himself, wrapping careful arms around his Prince's back. "Mmm, you are," he teased, running soft hands over the spandex-clad back. "Never leave me, 'Geta. I love you."

Vegeta chuckled, hands sliding over the bare chest. "Never, Kakarrot. Love," he promised, unable to keep his lips from turning into a wide smile. It was no use. He was too happy.

Feeling gentle fingers caress and stroke his aching stomach, the Prince nestled down into his lover's grip, legs sliding over Goku's sides, suddenly aware of a soft pressure against his inner thigh. He laughed out loud in response, raising an eyebrow. "My, Kakarrot, what have we here?" Vegeta chuckled, nibbling at the larger Saiyan's neck. "Hn, it's exhausting to keep up with you and your damn needs. Consider yourself lucky I'm not further along. Just wait a month or two. I won't have the energy."

Goku grinned, cheeks pink with embarrassment as he touched gently at his lover's belly. "I can't wait."

--

(4 months later)

"Aww, these are cute, 'Geta," Goku smiled, holding up the sets of tiny pajamas they had bought earlier as his free hand massaged the Prince's swollen ankles. "Just imagine how sweet he'll look in this one."

Vegeta scoffed, incredibly sore. "You're such a woman, Kakarrot," he sighed softly, eyes fluttering shut as he moaned out softly in pain. GodS, the last four months had been brutal to say the least. Not only had the damn cub been kicking at his insides nonstop, but along with the pregnancy had come swellings, nausea, and the disgusting inability to hold anything down. Put simply, Vegeta had been a trembling, vomiting, bed-confined mass of slow-moving Saiyan Prince.

"Come here, beautiful," Goku glowed up at the smaller man, creeping slowly up the tender body, rubbing his cheek against his mate's. "I love you so much."

Snorting, the Prince leaned up to press against his lover, large belly preventing much movement. "Ngh, I look disgusting and you know it," he grumbled in annoyance, eyes opening to form slits. "Cub's getting restless. I don't know how much more of this I can-Ahhh!!"

Hot blood beginning to trickle down over his thighs, Vegeta gripped feverishly at his mate's shoulders, head thrashing from side to side in agony. It-it was happening.

It was actually happening.

Stomach beginning to tear, the Prince clawed and grabbed at Goku's back, tears already flowing freely down his face.

--

:3 Cub-let's coming.


	18. Alive

**Letting Go**

by** icypinkpop**

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shounen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, wife bashing (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, angst, graphic sex, MPREG (later), anything one can warn about.

Author's note (changes with chapter): My reviewers keep guessing what's going to happen next XD; I've got some pretty smart readers.

As for the plot of this one, let's just say I've still got a surprise or two up my sleeve. Enjoy!

_'Text'_ - Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

******--**

**Chapter 18: Alive******** –**

Goku could only watch in complete shock as Vegeta tore and gasped up at him, feeling warm blood trickle down between their bodies, the smaller chest heave against his own. Suddenly drifting back to reality, the tall Saiyan slid downwards and divested the Prince of his pants, watching the small slit darken and rip, agonized screams meeting his ears.

"Kakarrot!!" Vegeta thrashed and squirmed in complete distress, gloved hands gripping frantically at Goku's shirt. "I-I need…"

The tall Saiyan began to tremble slightly, not knowing how he was to handle this situation. He wasn't at all sure what to do.

"Wh-what do you need, Vegeta?" he asked softly, running his hands over the other's bleeding abdomen, fingers coating with red. "What is it?"

"I-" The Prince screamed out loudly, shaking violently in excruciating pain, tears running down the pale face. "I n-need you to-to get Raditz." Smaller arms wrapped weakly around his neck. "P-please go get him."

Goku blinked in shock as he was pulled close, running a bloody hand through the flame of hair. Raditz? Why did Vegeta need-

Oh.

Raditz was the father. It was only right that he saw the birth of their cub.

"O-okay," he agreed, brow furrowing a little in worry as he was immediately released from the gentle grasp. "But what about you, 'Geta? I-I can't just-"

"Go!" the Prince screamed, eyes opening to form slits. "P-please, Kakarrot. I-I need to see him. Just…don't-don't leave for long." Lithe muscles shook under Goku's hands.

Realizing just how badly Vegeta needed his past lover, the taller Saiyan nodded and gave his Prince's hand a parting squeeze, pressing two fingers against his forehead. "I-I'll be back soon," he promised, taking a deep breath as he fazed out of sight. "Soon."

--

Deaf to King Yemma's shouts of disapproval, Goku reappeared miles below Otherworld's check-in station, eyes wide with worry as he looked left and right for any traces of his estranged brother. What if he couldn't find him in time? What if he couldn't get back?

What if Vegeta died?

Trying in vain to force such thoughts from his mind, the tall Saiyan hovered out over the barren landscape, gaze constantly moving from the front to the side to behind him. "Raditz?!" he yelled out loudly, upping his speed, eyes still locked on his surroundings for any movement. GodS, what a terrible place to live…

"Raditz!" Goku cried in desperation, eyes beginning to water as he tapped into his and Vegeta's bond, feeling the pain his lover was being forced to endure. Sending out a warm thought of security and love, he suddenly caught sight of a figure and stopped dead in his tracks, falling silent. "Rad-huh?"

Gaze running over the gargantuan form, the warrior blinked in surprise and cocked a brow, watching the bald head gleam in the low light. Slowly, he trailed his eyes over the man's surroundings, looking over the firepit, the grey skeletons of various creatures that had been completely picked clean.

"Nappa?"

"Kakarrot."

Startled by the sudden voice behind him, Goku turned and came face-to-face with the object of his travels, stepping backwards in surprise. "Raditz!"

"Hn," the long haired warrior tossed his mane to the side, frowning with obvious dislike. "I'm surprised to see you here, dear brother. Aren't you supposed to be the savior of your wretched planet? Saiyan instincts finally caught up with you?"

Goku stared back, taking a deep breath. It was too good to be true. He had managed to find Raditz in a matter of minutes.

Transmitting a thought of reassurance to his bedridden Prince, the shorter Saiyan stared up into dark eyes, surprised by how much the other's face reminded him of his own.

"R-Raditz, I-" he gulped, trying to be quick. "Me and Vegeta need you to come to Earth. He-he's having your cub."

"What?!" The larger of the two blinked slowly in obvious surprise, fists clenching at his sides. "My cub? How do you know about me and Prince Vegeta?!" he snarled out, watching Goku step slowly backwards. "How dare you taunt me in such a way!"

Goku cocked his head, wondering exactly what he had said to make the other man so incredibly angry. Sighing, he pulled his shirt to expose his neck and let his head fall to the side, watching black orbs widen further in shock. "We-we're mated," he explained quickly. "He told me everything. We accidentally wished back his pregnancy from before." Goku blinked in complete confusion. "Taunt you?"

Raditz growled back in response, eyes large in disbelief as he eyed the claim mark on his brother's pale flesh. "Frieza killed our cubs before Vegeta was due," he explained quietly, large chest heaving as he breathed in deeply. "You wished them back to life with the dragon balls? He's having them right now?"

"C-cubs?!" Goku blinked, gasping out loudly in realization as he placed a hand on his brother's broad shoulder. "Yes! I-I'll explain more after. He needs you to be there." The smaller warrior closed his eyes, taking a breath of relief. _'We're on our way.'_

--

Vegeta tossed miserably back and forth, excruciating pain throbbing through every muscle, fogging his find and eyes with a veil of agony. He-he couldn't do this alone. It was too much. He needed his mate.

Screaming out loudly as he felt his lower belly tear open further, the Prince blinked wretchedly at the empty space before him, wishing more than anything that Kakarrot were here. He had felt his lover's thoughts of reassurance, but was in a great deal too much pain to understand where they were coming from or what they signified. Right now, all he could think about was the unending torture he was being forced to endure.

Suddenly confronted with two wide-eyed visages, Vegeta reached out with shaking fingers, gloves pale. He gasped out as he realized just who his visitors were and cried out, strong hands settling around his shoulders, a distinctive head of spiky hair coming to sit between his legs.

He looked over his shoulder at the larger man, wondering detachedly if he had somehow, in some impossible way, died and been granted access into Heaven.

"R-Raditz?!" Cold tears streamed down his face as he stared into a pair of nearly identical eyes, gloved hands coming up to grasp and yank shakily at his previous lover's long mane. He gazed back at the smaller of the two, trembling violently. "K-K-Kaka, you…" He moaned lowly, blood leaking out warmly over his thighs. "You b-brought him."

He watched through hooded eyes as his mate smiled back, nodding once in reply. Vegeta shivered at the understanding in those beautiful ebony orbs, the comprehension in his Kakarrot's smile. He tried to smile back, failing miserably as another intense shot of pain struck through his body like a knife.

Screaming out, the small Prince spread his legs out as wide as they could possibly go, feeling Goku's hands touch experimentally at his ripping abdomen, Raditz' strong fingers rubbing at his neck in an attempt to comfort. He threw his head back on the larger Saiyan's shoulder, panting, eyes shut. He couldn't think any more. Right now, all he could do was finish what his desires had started.

"Raditz," he grasped at the larger hands, pulling them close against his heart, feeling no resistance as he placed the warm digits over his chest. GodS, he hadn't felt Raditz' touch in so long. It was like floating about in a dream almost forgotten.

Slow actions conveying what he needed, Vegeta felt Goku press closer, rubbing his stomach firmly yet soothingly. He very much doubted Kakarrot had ever delivered a baby before, but he didn't care. He trusted his mate with his life, as well as the little life he was carrying inside him. Vegeta didn't have any reason or energy to do anything else.

"Ohh, K-Kakarrot," he tried to press his stomach closer against the soothing hands, thighs flexing shakily as he attempted to force his new cub from inside him. Voice stolen in the throes of agony, the Saiyan Prince simply lay back against his past companion, feeling his son's head emerge from his torn, bloody flesh. He-he couldn't believe it.

He was actually giving birth to his son.

Screaming, Vegeta shook and gasped as he clung at the sheets, too consumed by the excruciating pain to know what was going on or how long it was to last. Vision black beneath closed lids, the smallest Saiyan present gave his past lover's hands a weak squeeze, legs trembling in the open air. "Kakarrot!!"

--

"Ahh!" Goku carefully wrapped his hands around the squealing newborn, taking a blanket from the bed and wrapping the tiny Saiyan inside it. Deep chocolate eyes regarded him from under a long, spiky mane, one solitary bang sweeping over the little forehead. "O-oh my god," he gasped, folding the little cub against his chest, holding it firmly against his heart. Blood trickled down over his abdomen. "S-son…"

Raditz merely watched his brother's display from across the bed, dark eyes glimmering as he watched Goku hold his little son. He wanted to take the tiny Saiyan into his own arms, to hold it close and stare into the wide, black eyes. But there was simply no time.

"Huh?" Goku looked over at his brother, eyes watery. "D-do you want to hold him?" he asked, fully breathless, forgetting about what Raditz had said earlier regarding their 'cubs'.

The larger Saiyan blinked back, hands still pressed against Vegeta's chest. "There's one more coming," he reminded, watching wide eyes glimmer in remembrance. "It's not over yet. He still needs support."

Nodding slowly, Goku slipped back to his position between his lover's legs, holding the small cub to his chest. "I-I don't want to drop him," he said softly, watching the second cub begin to slip from Vegeta's slit. He didn't know how he was going to hold one cub and deliver the other at the same time.

"Here," Raditz padded over to his younger brother, quickly taking the small bundle into his grasp. "I won't hurt him," the larger reassured, noticing the shimmer of concern in Goku's eyes. "I happen to be the brat's father, Kakarrot." Ignoring the other's reaction, he returned to his place at Vegeta's side, holding the new cub close against his Prince's side. "It's almost over. One down," he slid his free hand back over Vegeta's heart, his past lover's heavy breathing echoing in his ears. "You can do it."

--

"Wh-what?!" Vegeta thrashed about in confusion and pain, eyes opening slightly to regard Raditz with incredulity. A-another one?! He didn't even remember when he had lost the cubs to Frieza all those years ago; the pain and stress had caused him to black out during the excruciating experience. He had assumed there had been only one…

At least now he understood why the pain wasn't lessening up any.

Completely unsure of his ability to last much longer in this particular war with agony, Vegeta pressed his cheek against his new son, unable to open his eyes for any amount of time to catch a glimpse of the little Saiyan he had produced. He-he didn't think he could do this. It was all too much.

"C'mon, 'Geta, hang on." The Prince felt Goku's lips on his stomach, shivering as they moved gently above his tearing slit. "You can do this, you're strong. You can do it."

Legs flexing shakily as he tried to push, Vegeta screamed out and went limp, tears streaming down his face. He put every bit of effort into breathing and attempting to force out the second cub, holding Raditz' hands against his chest, leaning into Goku's bloody kisses. GodS, he couldn't hear, he couldn't see. He could only feel.

Giving a final, excruciating push, the Prince of all Saiyans collapsed in a trembling, bloody mass, darkness claiming every thought.

--

Raditz could only watch as the two tiny, now-clean cubs nuzzled sleepily against their unconscious mother, shivering in the open air. He pulled the duvet cover up over all three Saiyans, casting a glance to his younger brother, who sat across from him on the bed.

"He's been out for awhile," Raditz mused, hands not once leaving their place over Vegeta's heart. "Took it rough. He didn't know there was going to be more than one."

"Yeah." Goku wasn't able to say much as he stared down at the two little ones, watching them huddle up against his mate. Eyeing the torn, bloody stomach, he rose reluctantly from Vegeta's side and stepped into the other room, returning with a brown pouch.

"Senzu beans," he explained at his brother's look of confusion, extracting a single legume and popping it into his mouth. "They've got some pretty good healing properties. Maybe he'll wake up." Slowly, feeling slightly awkward yet not caring, Goku leaned in closer and sealed his lips over Vegeta's, pressing the chewed fragments down his Prince's throat. "C'mon, swallow," he ushered softly, murmuring into the smaller's mouth.

Raditz simply watched the display, regarding his brother's actions with a single blink. He felt no hatred for the younger Saiyan, no jealousy. He wasn't really sure what to think. His trysts with Vegeta had been so, so long ago; it only made sense that the Prince had found someone else to love. The same way he had.

Sighing, he stroked his elder son's back with a calloused finger, watching the little being squirm in its sleep. So precious. When Frieza had forced his cubs from Vegeta all those years ago, he had thought any chance of his sons living was gone for good. It was nearly impossible to believe that they were actually alive before him. His own flesh and blood wrapped up in two tiny packages.

"Uh-uhhh…"

Surprised by the grunt of consciousness, both third-class Saiyans turned towards their Prince, watching dark eyes flutter slowly open. Vegeta squirmed weakly in pain as he came to, staring down at his sons in shock, trembling arms moving to curl shakily around the little cubs.

"Raditz," the smaller said in shock, voice thick with emotion, tears slipping silently down pale cheeks. Obviously too tired to speak much more, Vegeta simply looked up at his past lover, breathing in deeply. "Th-thank you," he whispered, lips trembling. He gave his mate a single, pleading glance, chest heaving.

Goku watched Vegeta shake from across the bed, realizing what his lover wanted. Nodding slowly in agreement, he gave his weakened Prince a reassuring smile, refraining from moving closer. He didn't want to ruin the smaller's moment with Raditz. These few fleeting moments were all the time Vegeta would have left to do and say what he needed to.

Catching the empathetic glint in his lover's eye, Vegeta sighed out gratefully and leaned towards his friend, his past lover, his companion. Taking a single breath in an effort to calm himself, the Prince pressed his lips gently against the larger Saiyan's basking in the moment, hands fisting in the long mane he hadn't touched for over thirty years.

Raditz hardly moved as he pressed his lips back against Vegeta's, placing a strong hand softly on the royal shoulder. He sighed, unable to swallow back the single tear that leaked down the side of his face. Slowly, reluctantly, he pulled away from the gentle kiss, mane swaying as he bowed his head respectfully.

Vegeta reached out, muscles protesting as he gripped a muscular arm. "I-I am sorry," he apologized, feeling slightly guilty for falling in love with Kakarrot. He didn't regret it in the least; Goku was everything he had ever wanted. But it hadn't been fair to Raditz. "I-I didn't mean-"

"Shhh." The largest Saiyan placed a finger over his Prince's lips, silencing him. "It was only right of you, I am glad you are happy." He gave his brother a single glance before looking back to Vegeta. "I-I have moved on as well, my Prince. Forgive me. I figured you had forgotten."

Vegeta shook his head weakly back and forth, taking a larger hand within his own, eyes affixed on the halo above Raditz' head. "I feel the same. D-do not have any regret. We have both found our…places." He ran his thumb lightly over the larger palm, holding his cubs close.

Goku watched the display of affection with sad eyes. "We-we could use the dragon balls to wish you back," he softly suggested, looking at Raditz. "If-if you would both be happier. I don't want to keep you apart." He gulped, idly wondering if the Prince would be more content with his brother. He-he didn't want to lose Vegeta, but…his mate's happiness was more important than his own.

"No." Both other Saiyans shook their heads in unison, the smaller beckoning Goku closer. Vegeta grasped out, releasing Raditz' hand in favor of holding his mate's. "It-it has been too long for us, Kakarrot. You are what I choose." The Prince's lips ghosted over his lover's hand, dark eyes flickering quickly back to Raditz. "It is b-best if you go. Just…come back."

Raditz nodded sadly in answer, wiping the single tear from his cheek. "I will, my Prince. Somehow." He stood slowly from the bed, gazing down at his two, tiny sons. The tall Saiyan stared over at his brother, eyes slightly narrowed. "Treat him right, Kakarrot," he said in warning, tail puffing behind him. "Or I'll find a way back and kill you myself."

Goku nodded back at his brother, chuckling a little in his throat. "Always," he said simply, extending a hand to let it fall over Raditz' shoulder. "Hold on." He pressed two fingers against his forehead, looking back at his mate. _'I'll be back soon.'_

Concentrating, the middle-heighted Saiyan breathed in deeply, brother beside him as he fazed out of sight.

--

Stay tuned.


	19. Truth

**Letting Go**

by** icypinkpop**

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shounen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, wife bashing (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, angst, graphic sex, MPREG (later), Truten (!), anything one can warn about.

Author's note (changes with chapter): The result of listening to too much Nickelback and trying to read Shakespeare at the same time. I hope thou enjoyeth.

_'Text'_ - Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

******--**

**Chapter 19: Truth******** –**

"Oh, 'Geta," Goku looked down at the two tiny cubs, running a hand through his exhausted lover's hair as he held Vegeta close. "You did so good. They're so beautiful." He smiled, tears leaking from his eyes.

Vegeta squirmed a little in the embrace, a sleeping cub held tightly in each arm. "Mmn, I-I can't believe it, Kakarrot," he said quietly, looking up at his mate with wide eyes. "I know they-they aren't yours, but…please keep them safe. I don't know what I would do if-if they…"

"Shhh," Goku held a finger to his lover's lips, eyes wide. "Of course I will, Vegeta. I would never let them get hurt." He pressed a loving kiss to his Prince's temple, smiling softly. "I just hope you don't mind me being their dad."

The smaller man sighed, shaking his head back and forth. "Never, Kaka. Y-you will be a great father to them." Twin tears slid slowly down his cheeks, dark eyes flickering down to gaze at his two new sons. "Th-they are…beautiful," he choked out, a rare smile crossing the Prince's face.

Goku could only nod, touched. He reached out slowly to stroke the closest cub's back with a strong finger, gently touching the long, spiky mane, watching his son squirm slightly. Moments later, the tiny Saiyan looked up, dark eyes wide.

"Um, sorry," the tall Saiyan chuckled in apology, watching the cub crawl drowsily over its mother's naked chest. "I didn't mean to wake him up."

Vegeta grunted in reply, reaching out to hold his son close. The little one squirmed in the grasp, mouth immediately latching onto the Prince's right nipple. Sighing, Vegeta breathed in deeply as his son drank, dark eyes drifting shut as its little lips coaxed out rivulets of hot milk.

Goku stared, his lover's explanations regarding the feeding process not having been enough to prepare him for the touching sight. "'G-'Geta," he gasped out, looking down at the little Raditz look-a-like. "O-oh my gosh, he's drinking. Look."

"I can see that, Kakarrot," Vegeta said flatly, expression betraying his own happiness as he held the little Saiyan close. It was only a matter of minutes before the second cub, a tousled-haired Vegeta copy with wide eyes, followed its brother's example, seemingly having smelled the food.

"What should we…name them?" Goku asked in curiosity, watching his lover hold both feeding sons. They had discussed the topic before, but it had never resulted in any definite choices. "You said you wanted to name one after you," he looked briefly down at the cub that looked most like its mother. "But what about the other one? I-I don't have any ideas." The largest Saiyan stroked the slightly larger cub's back, touching the undeniably Raditz-esque mane.

The Prince gave an exhausted sigh, collapsing limply into the blankets. "Y-you may name him," he said softly, dark eyes drifting shut. "I…cannot think about this now. I'm t-tired."

Remembering exactly what his lover had just gone through, Goku nodded and tucked Vegeta in, eyes wide. "Okay, sleep well," he whispered, crawling into bed alongside his mate. He wrapped one arm around the newly narrow waist, stroking his smaller cub's back with his free hand as a smile curved his lips.

Everything was good.

--

"No… no no no no no!!"

Vegeta thrashed and squirmed on the opposite side of the bed, away from his mate and cubs as he gasped in terror, shaking. A grim black settled over his vision, Frieza's chilled whisper drifting about endlessly in his head. Cold red eyes appeared in the Prince's mind, penetrating him to the core of his soul, tears leaking freely down his cheeks.

"N-no, you c-can't…"

--

"_So you are too weak to resist, aren't you?" A snakelike tail curled mercilessly around his bitten throat, crimson blood running in rivulets down his lips. "You always come back for more. Even when you have what you say you want. I suppose that third-class will never satiate your true hunger." Dark red coated the Saiyan's thighs._

_Vegeta couldn't speak. He wanted to scream that he didn't desire this, to tear his Master to bloody pieces, to tell him truthfully that Kakarrot was all he had ever needed._

_He didn't want this torture, but he had never known life without it._

"_Are you scared?" Frieza chuckled, a black-nailed hand raking the skin of his arm to shreds. "You will always come back to me, my little monkey Prince. This is what you know. This is how you will live."_

"_NO!!"_

_Vegeta choked as blood filled his mouth, dark eyes squinted shut._

--

Gasping for air, the Prince sat up shakily from the mattress, eyes large with horror as the real world seeped into his blurry vision. He breathed in deeply, looking down at his bloody stomach. It was true. He always went back.

He always returned to what he didn't want, even if it was by way of dreams.

Disgusted, Vegeta extended a hand and briskly slapped himself across the face, looking over at his two tiny cubs with sad eyes. He was hopeless. How could he be a mother to his offspring when he had never been a child himself? How could he be a good mate to Kakarrot when he was raped more often than made love to?

How could he accept Goku's love when he wasn't sure he even understood what it was?

Vegeta sighed, blinking down at the crimson-stained sheets. He knew how he felt when Kakarrot kissed him, when his lover held him close, but what was that? Affection, desire, lust, or was that love? He had no idea how to tell.

But he couldn't leave. He had already tried that once, and had discovered the extent of Kakarrot's feelings for him in the process. Besides, he had no desire to abandon his mate, his cubs. They were his world. Vegeta couldn't stand the thought that he was the defective piece in their little family of four. His sons and his lover were too perfect a picture to mar with his sickness.

Trembling, the kingdomless Prince gave his mate a single glance, nuzzling the soft neck. All he could do was to hang on, pray that his nightmares would fade. Hope that he could understand what love was.

Teeth gritting, Vegeta forced himself from the bed, padding shakily down the hallway.

--

"Mmm, l-love," Goku murmured, sleeping cubs still in his grasp as he rolled over, feeling for his lover. Dark eyes drifting open when he realized Vegeta was no longer in bed, the taller Saiyan gasped in surprise, standing up. His Prince had managed to get up and walk already so soon after the birth? He smiled. Vegeta never ceased to amaze him.

Leaving the two cubs beneath the arm covers (both of which nuzzled up against each other as their primary source of heat was removed), Goku pulled on a pair of pajama pants and walked sleepily into the other room, eyes large.

Vegeta was throwing weak punches into the open air, trembling as he staggered forwards with the force.

"'Geta!" Goku ran forward to catch his lover in his arms, holding the weakened body close. "What are you doing? You should be in bed." He carefully took the squirming body into his arms, lifting his Prince up off the floor.

"Nrgh, I-I feel so weak," Vegeta whimpered as he was carried back into the bedroom, stretching out beneath the sheets. "I want to train, Kaka. I can't lay here in bed forever." The smaller tried to slide onto his feet again, sighing in pain.

The larger Saiyan shook his head, placing strong hands on his lover's shoulder. "Please don't, you'll hurt yourself." His eyes trailed down to the torn stomach. "How about I clean you up a little, and then I'll help you do some stretching? I know it's probably weird staying so still."

Nodding, Vegeta gave in, leaning back on the bed alongside his cubs. He waited silently until his lover returned with a soft cloth and a bowl of hot water, hissing as his thighs were doused with the steamy liquid.

"Kakarrot?" he moaned out softly in contentment, mind still in turmoil as he tried to figure out how to word what he needed to ask. He eventually just decided to speak his thoughts, watching Goku cleanse his lower body. "Kaka, what-what is love?"

Goku looked up as if he had just been told Vegeta planned to kill himself.

"What's love?" The taller repeated the question in disbelief, dark eyes glimmering with obvious sadness, soft lips parted. "Y-you don't know, 'Geta?"

"I-I think I have some idea," the smaller responded, threading his fingers with Kakarrot's in a gesture of attempted reassurance. "But I'm not…sure. I want to make sure I can f-feel it." Bronze flesh quaked beneath Goku's pale hands.

The larger Saiyan watched Vegeta closely, one brow cocked. "You don't think you can feel it? What are you talking about, 'Geta? Did something happen?" He ran his fingertips over the Prince's cheek, watching the smaller's eyes dart away from his own. "Vegeta, please look at me."

Vegeta stared his lover in the face, tears already threatening to spill over. "Kaka I-" He took a deep breath, bracing himself. "Please, just tell me. I don't understand what I'm…feeling." He squeezed the hand in his grasp. "I-"

The Prince had no time to speak further before he was enveloped in a tight hug, his two drowsing cubs nestled between the bodies of him and his mate.

"This is love, 'Geta." A strong voice whispered softly into his ear, arms curling around his body like two pythons, holding him close. "Being here all together, a family. Us and our cubs. That's love." The taller pulled back just enough for Vegeta to see his smile. "I-I'm not sure how else to put it. It's how I care for you, 'Geta. Our bond." Goku rested his hand on the smaller's neck, stroking his bite scar.

Vegeta nodded slowly, letting the words sift through his head. Love. That had to be what he was feeling. He simply couldn't think of any other explanation for his behavior, for the ways he had been acting.

But he still didn't know if he could return it the right way.

Sighing, the Prince leaned up against his mate, slowly moving their cubs to the side, fisting his fingers in Kakarrot's velvet locks. He would try to understand, to give his lover all the…love he was being given in return. All he could do was try. Maybe, for once in his life, he would succeed in his attempts.

Vegeta pulled Goku over his trembling body, lips latching onto soft petals so much like his own.

--

"So tiny," Goten looked down at his new brothers with wide eyes, stroking the larger's pajama-clad back as he glanced up at his father. "So they're twins?"

Goku nodded at the two boys, holding the little Saiyans close to his chest. "Yup. 'Geta's still sore, it was a really hard birth." He placed each cub into its respective crib, feeling the smaller one squirm in defiance, whimpering. Without a thought, the tall Saiyan took his son back into his grasp, holding his finger to its lips, feeling tiny teeth pierce his skin.

"What the heck?!" Trunks stepped backwards in shock, blue eyes wide as he held onto Goten's hand for support. "A-and I thought father's way of feeding them was weird. They…drink _blood_?"

Chuckling, Goku allowed the cub to drink its fill, nodding again in affirmation. "Yeah. 'Geta's the only one that can give them milk, but either of us can feed them this way." He smiled as a tiny tongue lapped at his finger. "Sometimes it's easier for me to do it, since Vegeta's been really tired."

"Speaking of Vegeta," Goten leaned back against his new lover's shoulder, looking up at briefly at the other demi. "Where is he? Shouldn't he be in bed?"

"He should be," Goku sighed, placing the satisfied cub back into its nest of blankets. "But he's really been itching to move around. I don't think he's used to being so cooped up all the time." The tall Saiyan looked up at the ceiling, feeling for his lover's ki. "He's on the roof."

Trunks leaned back against Goten, nodding. "Okay, we can come back another time. Just wanted to make sure everything was going okay." He gave Goku a brief hug. "And thanks for understanding about, er-" The elder demi looked back at Goten, eyes gleaming. "You know."

Goku laughed, releasing Trunks in favor of embracing his teenage son. "Hey, don't worry about it. I hope everything goes okay with you two." He pulled away, chuckling. "Just make sure to use protection, unless you want a few of these." The larger warrior gestured to his cubs, grinning obliviously.

Mere moments passed before the two demis ran off, both blushing furiously as they stuttered out their goodbyes.

--

Vegeta stared up at the stars, dark eyes gleaming in the moonlight as he stretched back against the cool metal of the roof.

It was no use. He couldn't remember.

Sighing, he attempted once more to discern the patterns of the stars, mind drifting back to his childhood on Vegetaseii. His memory strained as he tried desperately to recollect the symbols he had learned were etched into the sky above, eyes watery. It didn't seem fair. The stars here were all different.

Giving a final, discouraged breath, the Prince thought back to his most recent dreams, eyes falling shut. He-he needed to somehow prove that he trusted Kakarrot. It didn't seem like he could truly love the larger Saiyan without making sure he trusted him first.

Vegeta gulped. It was so difficult. Even in his most open moments when he kissed Goku, when they made love, he…was always afraid at first. Many a time had it crossed his mind that Kakarrot could, with very little effort, destroy his mind and body and leave him broken forever.

He wanted to get rid of that instinctive mistrust once and for all, to feel perfectly safe in Kakarrot's arms and beneath his body.

He didn't want to be scared anymore.

Hearing distinctive footsteps pad their way towards him over the rooftop, Vegeta turned to face his lover, regarding Goku with dark, shimmering eyes.

He had a plan.

--

X3


	20. Trust

**Letting Go**

******by ****icypinkpop**

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shounen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, wife bashing (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, angst, graphic sex, MPREG (later), Truten (!), anything one can warn about.

Author's note (changes with chapter): A tad bit grim, but what else did you expect? Mostly a teaser for the chapter that's coming next. Speaking of it, the following installment will be a LEMON (-claps- We've been needing one of those, eh?), so it will be censored on most sites. ;3

'Text' - Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

******--**

**Chapter 20: Trust ********–**

(2 months later)

Vegeta chuckled as the two little cubs crawled shakily across the soft carpet, naked bodies clothed only with ribbons and torn paper as they wrestled playfully beside the fire. He looked up at the tall tree, dark eyes regarding the shining star on top. It reminded him of space, but in a…nicer way.

"I don't understand it." The Prince cocked his head in honest curiosity, snuggling further under the soft blanket as he leaned against his mate. "Why take a dead tree and decorate the remains? What does it mean?"

Goku shrugged, smiling against Vegeta's skin. "I dunno, but it's pretty, huh?" He tightened his grip, eyes moving to the cubs. "I love Christmas. I think they do, too."

Snorting, the smaller man yanked his new sweater over his head, watching the tiny Saiyans wrestle playfully over a strip of ribbon. The slightly larger of the two pounced onto its brother, tiny tail puffing out as the little cubs slapped and snarled at each other. "Hn, they're just enjoying the scraps," he chuckled out, eyes betraying his own happiness. Sighing in comfort, he looked up at his lover, tracing the dark patch of blue on Goku's cheek with the pad of his thumb.

"That bastard, I swear." He narrowed his eyes in anger, looking away. "I'm surprised you don't just kill him and get it over with. That three-eyed freak has no right to lay his hands on my mate."

Sighing, Goku pressed closer, holding a boneless Vegeta in his arms. "C'mon, let's just forget about him." He nuzzled the Prince's neck. "It's Christmas, 'Geta. And it's just him and Chichi, and it's not like they can hurt us. Everyone else seems to be fine with it."

"Hn, I don't care," Vegeta sighed out, stretching back against Goku. "They have no right to try and attack my mate. You are mine." The Prince turned around and pressed his lips to the other's neck, tail curling around his lover's waist. " Bastards."

Grinning, the larger of the two leaned forward to kiss his mate, a noisy purr breaking the silence. "Aww, you love me," he teased softly, unable to resist. Vegeta was so wonderful.

Said Saiyan looked up in annoyance at the remark, rolling his eyes. "And you'd better return the favor," he growled in answer, sighing as he rested against the larger chest. He bit his lip. It had been over two months, and he still hadn't been able to put his plan into action. The nightmares had been as bad as ever; he woke almost every night, head swimming and tears of fear leaking from his eyes. His lover was worried and confused, but Vegeta understood. He understood why the godsdamned dreams weren't going away.

He simply didn't feel safe if he couldn't see what was going on.

Trembling a little in the powerful embrace, he thought back to when Raditz would hold him close, how strong hands would run over his back after a particularly savage night in Frieza's grasp. He had always been the same. Sure, everything was fine in the daytime, when he could witness everything around him and was aware of where his enemies lurked. But it was different at night. He was completely helpless; anyone could easily take advantage of his obliviousness.

Vegeta had no defenses when his guards were dropped.

While a part of the Prince argued that that wasn't true, that Goku would guard him even when his own faculties lay dormant, another piece of him did not. It argued that Kakarrot, the man he shared his bed and body with almost every night, could easily be the enemy lurking, waiting for his precious guards to drop. He shuddered. His fear wasn't mollified in the least by the fact that his lover was likely the one person in the universe he could not fend off even if he tried.

To put it simply, Vegeta was afraid to close his eyes, and that was the last thing he wanted to be.

Gulping, the Prince looked up at his mate, eyes slightly watery. He needed to prove to himself that Goku meant no harm, that he could trust the larger Saiyan with his body and his soul. And he could only think of one way to do it.

"Want some food?"

Startled from his reverie, Vegeta breathed in the aroma of cooking turkey, giving his lover a grateful smile. Nodding, he slipped from the couch and took the squirming cubs into his arms, following Goku into the kitchen for some Christmas dinner.

He would do it tonight.

--

"'Geta!" Goku called out, wrapping up the leftovers and placing them into the refrigerator. "Did you put Rad and Veg to bed?" Cocking a brow, the tall Saiyan padded down the hallway in his new slippers, popping his head into the cubs' bedroom.

Smiling, Goku watched the little Saiyans nuzzle sleepily at each other in their shared bed. The tiny Saiyans usually slept in the bedroom with their parents (as Vegeta, Goku had realized, didn't like to leave them alone for long), so the sign that they were in their own room likely meant that the Prince wanted to make love.

More than eager to comply, the tall Saiyan stepped over towards the bedroom door, twisting the knob and looking immediately at the bed.

What he saw caused his lips to part in shock.

Vegeta was laying naked against the pillows, hands and ankles bound by glowing rings of ki, a black strip of cloth tied over the Prince's eyes. A single, thin sheet was draped over the obviously shivering form.

"'Geta!" he gasped out in shock, running up to the smaller's side, brows furrowed in confusion. "Wh-what's…what happened?" He immediately reached up to break the bands of energy form Vegeta's wrists, only stopping when a pair of soft lips pressed against his cheek.

"Kakarrot," Vegeta sighed, shaking his head back and forth. "P-please don't."

Completely confused, Goku slipped the blindfold up to rest on the smaller forehead, looking into dark eyes. "What do you mean?" he asked, looking over the smaller body in concern. "What happened, Vegeta? Did someone…tie you up?" The taller snarled in instinct, looking around the room for any sign of the bastard that had done this to his mate.

"I did, Kakarrot."

Blinking in shock, the addressed Saiyan looked back into dark ebony orbs, head cocked as perplexity replaced anger. "Why?"

Vegeta sighed, averting Goku's gaze for a moment before looking back into his mate's face. "I-I need to make myself trust you, Kakarrot," he explained, watching the larger's face fall slightly. "No, I mean-I do trust you. I just…the nightmares…" The Prince trailed off, shaking his head a little at his own inability to answer a simple question. "I can't stand this fright. I want to-to end it once and for all."

Realizing what his lover was getting at, Goku gasped in shock and ran his hand over the smaller's neck, feeling bronze flesh shiver beneath his fingers. "You want to…make love like this?" he asked in surprise, watching Vegeta give a stiff nod. He gulped, dark eyes large. "But isn't this what…what-"

"What Frieza used to do, yes," Vegeta nodded, having divulged that particular bit of information after a severe nightmare one night had left him nearly unable to speak. "I-it has to be this way, Kakarrot. I need to know that I'm…safe."

Worried, Goku leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to Vegeta's lips, never once breaking the precious gaze.

"I-I don't want to," the tall Saiyan shook his head, not liking the way Vegeta was bound up. He knew from experience that ki rings were nearly impossible to get out of, and…he didn't want to take Vegeta when his lover couldn't move or see.

Vegeta sighed his reply, looking down at the thin white blanket. "I-I need you to do this for me, Kakarrot," he pleaded softly, lip bit. "I know you will not hurt me, but…I need to feel it. I don't want to be afraid anymore." The Prince arched up as much as the bands would let him, knocking the blindfold back down over his eyes with a shake of his head. "Just…take me. Please."

Gulping, Goku looked down at the prone body of his mate, crawling slowly over his shaking Prince. "Okay," he finally agreed, sighing. If that was what Vegeta wanted…

Pressing another gentle kiss to his lover's mouth, the taller of the two stripped himself of his sweater, shaking his pants down to his knees. Divesting himself fully of both articles, Goku shivered slightly in the open air, pulling the heavier blanket over them both, pinning Vegeta to the bed as lightly as possible. Feeling the smaller tremble in obvious anticipation, the gentle Saiyan stroked his mate's cheek with a strong hand, watching the Prince turn instinctively away from the touch before calming a few moments later.

Goku bit his lip. This was going to be difficult for both of them.

"Shh, don't worry, I'm here," he said softly, sucking lovingly at the soft spot on Vegeta's neck. Taking a deep breath, he slid his hand slowly down the bronze chest, feeling his lover begin to shake more violently. He gasped, the realization of just how terrified Vegeta must be finally hitting home.

He had never realized just how violently the Prince reacted when he wasn't sure of his safety.

Sighing, Goku continued to whisper words of reassurance into Vegeta's ear, hands roaming softly over his mate's shivering skin. He stopped at the Prince's waist, not wanting to move too quickly. He felt a little guilty for the way his body was already responding to the sight of his lover's own.

"Mmmn," the gentle Saiyan licked his way over Vegeta's chest and abdomen, enjoying the taste of spicy flesh. A little moan reached his ears and he continued, lips curling around the Prince's right nipple, tongue flicking over the tiny bead as hot milk ran in rivulets down his chin. Not having expected that, Goku gave a surprised chuckle, licking away the thick fluid.

Only when Vegeta sobbed did the larger Saiyan come back to the reality of the situation.

Surprised, Goku slid his hand up to cup the smaller's face, wiping away the single tear that slid from covered eyes. "Shh, it's all right," he promised, feeling Vegeta's fear and uneasiness through the bond. He gulped, stroking the flame of hair. "You're safe. Don't be scared."

--

Vegeta trembled under the touches, lip bit between his teeth. He wanted to do as Kakarrot said. He didn't want to be scared.

But he simply didn't know how he could trust Goku when he had no idea what the other was going to do next.

Sighing, he leaned up as much as he was able in his current state, pressing his shaking lips against Kakarrot's cheek in apology for his actions. Using all the courage he could muster, he arched up at his mate, spreading his thighs, ankles and wrists warm with the ki surrounding them.

This wasn't Frieza. This was Kakarrot.

Trying desperately to pound that fact into his shaking head, the Prince choked out his lover's name, repeating it over and over in his mind. Whimpering, he felt strong hands travel down between his legs and started in fright, forcing himself to calm. "N-no…" he muttered out in habit as he was gripped gently, a thumb gliding over sensitive flesh. Vegeta moaned unwillingly, eyes opening to see only black. Completely expecting that strong hand to turn cruel at any moment, to feel blood spurt down his thighs as it had countless times before, the Prince gasped as pleasure rocketed through his small body, the soft shifting of blankets beneath him bringing him back to reality once again.

Vegeta breathed in his mate's scent as he thrashed under the covers, only a strong body and a thick duvet serving to blanket him from the memories he knew were sure to spring forth again at any moment. Sighing, the smaller Saiyan groaned out his mate's name, trying to press up against the stroking fingers.

He shivered, head shaking back and forth, repeating the calming fact over and over again in his mind.

This wasn't Frieza. This was Kakarrot.

--

Lemon on its way :D


	21. Fall

**Letting Go**

by** icypinkpop**

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shounen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, wife bashing (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, angst, graphic sex, MPREG (later), implied Truten, anything one can warn about.

Author's note (changes with chapter): This chapter is **censored** for sexual content. Enjoi.

'_Text'_ - Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

******--**

**Chapter 21: Fall ********–**

"Mmmn," Goku gave a soft moan as he continued his gentle treatment of the Prince's neck, swiping his tongue slowly over the smaller's claim mark. It was still difficult for him to do this, but…he didn't want Vegeta to be scared. Despite all his attempted reassurance of his lover's fears, he supposed this was really the only way.

Feeling Vegeta give a little shudder as he slid a hand over the smaller thigh, Goku sighed out quietly and leaned down, giving him another reassuring kiss. "You're safe," he repeated slowly, wishing he could just tear off that awful blindfold and look into Vegeta's eyes. The tears were already flowing, and it was obvious that his mate was terrified beyond words. He sighed. "It's okay."

At Vegeta's small shiver, Goku decided it was best to illustrate his point by giving his lover's legs a gentle stroke, lifting the sheet ever so slightly to rub the Prince's thighs. He could understand why his lover was afraid, but…he hadn't realized until now just how deep Vegeta's wounds ran. Apparently, his mate's fear of Frieza couldn't be dispelled by words alone. The smaller Saiyan needed to feel the truth.

Wishing desperately that he could pull Vegeta into his lap and simply let the other cry out his pain, the larger Saiyan simply bent down and peppered gentle kisses across his lover's neck and face, feeling his Prince relax a little under the touches. He smiled a little. He himself was obviously the only one who had given Vegeta such treatment.

"All right so far?" he asked out of concern, rubbing strong hands over Vegeta's shoulders, letting his hand linger on the bite scar. "We can still stop. I-I don't want to take you scared like this." He nuzzled closer, trying to illustrate the extent of his understanding and worry.

Blindfold shifting over Vegeta's eyes, the smaller Saiyan shook his head back and forth fervently, trembling hands moving up to find and link around Goku's neck. "No, Kaka. I-I need it." A growing arousal pressed against the larger's thigh, causing Goku to gasp in surprise. "Just…be slow."

Surprised yet relieved that his lover seemed to be somewhat overcoming his issues, Goku nodded in agreement despite Vegeta's state of blindness and pressed his lips to the Prince's neck, murmuring softly in promise, "I love you."

Then commencing his delicate rubbing of the trembling, lithe form beneath him, he slid a gentle hand down to rest between Vegeta's thighs, breath fanning out over the Prince's flushed cheek. "You're safe," he promised, hand curling to grip sensitive flesh, sparks of heat shooting directly into his groin at the high moan of pleasure.

"I'm here for you."

* * *

**CENSORED** for lemon content. Please go to profile for the link to chapter **uncensored** (I highly suggest you do; There's a lot of cool emotional stuff you're missing by just reading it here.)

* * *

Feeling twin jaws of sharp teeth pierce the skin of his neck, the Prince lunged forward, golden power rushing through his shaking muscles, bands of ki shattering about his wrists as he wrapped his arms around the strong body that held him. Voice dying out from exhaustion, Vegeta bit weakly into the porcelain skin of what he knew to be his mate's neck, sparks of pleasure darting in colorful bands across the blackness of his vision.

He was safe here, unmoving, shaking in Goku's arms. He had never felt better than he did at this moment, last thrums of his orgasm darting through him, pride and fear let go completely, all apprehension and façade thrown to the wind.

It was perfect. Absolutely perfect.

Slowly, with a burnt, shaking hand, Vegeta took to blindfold up over his eyes to rest on his sweat-streaked forehead. He looked up into similar dark eyes, lips parted and cheeks flushed, the last vestiges of pleasure fading away. He had never felt so wanted, so whole, so completely uninhibited from fear. The perfection he had always wanted to gain through power and strength was right here in Goku's arms. Kakarrot was his, and he was Kakarrot's. Nothing had ever felt so good.

Lips latching onto his mate's, Vegeta lost himself in the most precious kiss he had ever had, tongue slipping out to taste and ravish Goku's mouth.

He sighed, lack of energy only allowing him a single thought as he drifted into a dark oblivion.

_'Love.'_

--

X'3


	22. Anew

**Letting Go**

by** icypinkpop**

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

Warnings: Yaoi (M/M), Shounen-ai, Uke Vegeta (not really a warning…), swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, implied masturbation, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, wife bashing (well, pretty much just Chichi bashing…), character death, violence, lime, angst, graphic sex, MPREG (later), Truten, almost anything one can warn about.

Author's note (changes with chapter): Well…this is the end of the road here, folks. -cries- Sorry I didn't warn you earlier.

I tried to give it some humor in the end X3 I hope you're surprised by my seemingly random choice.

'_Text'_ - Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

--

**Chapter 22: Anew –**

_(10 months later)_

"Huh?"

Goku made a sound of confusion as he took another bite of his cinnamon bun, eyes wandering over to the closed bathroom door. Perplexed at first by the muffled moans that seemed to emanate from the other side of the wood, he got up reluctantly from the warmth of his chair and padded over, placing his hand and the knob. He cocked a brow, blinking dumbly as he pushed his way in. Was that...Goten's voice? He hadn't known his son was-

"Dad!!!!"

The tall Saiyan could only watch in a state of quiet realization as he watched Goten tear the shower curtain from its rings. Said son wrapped it hastily around both himself and the other demi present, water showering down over his black locks, a gentle moan leaving his lips. "Wh-what are you doing?!"

Suddenly realizing exactly what fate had permitted him to witness, Goku gave simply gave a sheepish grin, head cocked. "Oh, um…hi guys."

Face a shade of pink rather similar to that of his mate, Trunks, seemingly both too reluctant and too shocked to move from his current position, continued his gentle hold of Goten's wrists, blue eyes huge. "Um, Goku, I-…sorry." Apparently being caught in the act with his boyfriend in the house of said boyfriend's FATHER wasn't exactly something he was prepared for. "I-I'll get out."

"Nah, don't worry," Goku gave a bit of a giggle, eyes shining at the entwined demis. He had suspected that this had been going on for awhile, but actually seeing it made him happy. It was so good to know his son had found somebody to love. "I'll leave. Er, have fun."

Determined to get out before he embarrassed the obviously flustered boys further, Goku quickly shut and locked himself out of the bathroom, a jubilant grin pulling at his lips as he slipped his new sweater over his head. He looked out the window, sensing his mate's ki on the roof.

Making a quick trip into the other room, the tall Saiyan then pressed two fingers to his forehead with his free hand, focusing intently on the point a few feet directly above his head.

--

Vegeta curled his mittened hands around his knee, head cocked upwards as he watched the flakes of snow fall gently onto his clothes. He gingerly raised a small snowflake to his lips, tongue flicking out to taste the cool water. The Prince couldn't help but smile. Damn baka had rubbed off on him.

A whooshing sound suddenly alerting him to the presence of said Saiyan, Vegeta watched his lover plop down rather unceremoniously beside him, their three little cubs squirming tiredly in Goku's grasp.

"They'll freeze," Vegeta said in surprise at his lover's actions, eyes wide as he took the little ones into his arms. He wrapped his arms gently around all three, ki flowing through his arms and body to warm the tiny Saiyans from the outside cold.

Goku smiled at the sight, reaching out to stroke the newest cub's cheek as it fed from his lover's chest. "Sorry, I tried to bundle them up good," he shrugged, slowly looking over his son's face. He grinned, nudging Vegeta's shoulder as his most recent experience came to mind, mentally transmitting his thoughts through their bond.

_'I just caught them at it.'_

Vegeta snorted, sighing. "About time. Brats can barely keep their hands off each other," the Prince chuckled out, rolling his eyes. "Knowing you, I suppose my son had better watch out for yours. Poor Trunks will end up with hundreds of these if Goten carries on the way you do." He gestured to the cubs, wrapping a careful hand around the newest one. His lips curved into a smile. "He's beautiful."

Grinning, Goku nodded, wrapping an arm around his mate's waist to help protect him from the cold winds. "He looks like me," he said quietly, suddenly realizing the implication of Vegeta's words. Giving a contented smile, he planted a soft kiss to the Prince's neck, lips warming at the touch to bronze flesh. "Sorry he came so soon. I-I know you probably weren't ready."

"Hn, I wasn't." Vegeta rolled his eyes, face betraying his own joy as his abused stomach twinged painfully at the reminder. "You'd better not intend to keep me pregnant all the time, Kakarrot." _'I don't know how much love I can take.'_

Gasping in surprise, the tall Saiyan leaned in to gently kiss Vegeta's lips, one hand wandering down to caress the three little cubs. He licked and nipped carefully at the Prince's mouth, opening his own for the insistent tongue of his lover, snowflakes melting around the aura of warm ki to speckle over their bodies in tiny drops. Goku groaned in happiness, free hand fisting in the chilly flame of hair.

The taller Saiyan smiled, a tear leaking unexpectedly from his eye. This was it. This was what they had gone through all this for, this was what Vegeta meant to him. Nothing could ever be better than sitting here with his mate, kissing his lips, arms linked around the smaller body. The nightmares, the pain, the memories they had had to endure. It was all worth it.

Nothing had ever felt so good.

--

"Mmmm." Vegeta made a pitiful attempt at speaking when Goku's lips latched over his own. He carefully held his cubs close as he slowly kissed back, moaning when Kakarrot's hands threaded into his dark locks.

The tears began to fall, but he made no attempt to wipe them away. Pride, humiliation, all inhibitions could disintegrate into the dust along with his fear. Such trivial things were no longer important.

Reluctantly pulling away from the lips against his own, Vegeta melted slowly into Goku's warm, loving gaze, for once in his life not caring what he looked like or what anyone thought. He was in love.

He didn't care about anything else.

All traces of his lifelong anger fading away at that one look, the Prince leaned up to brush his lips against a pale cheek, tears of joy raining down over his face and neck.

"I love you," he whispered out, meaning every syllable of every word, certain for the first time that he understood what he was promising. This was love, Goku had reminded him. Here in Kakarrot's arms, his three cubs nestled comfortably between them. He didn't need a precise definition for this feeling. To be honest, he didn't want one. He felt like he could simply let go of all sense and logic in Kakarrot's embrace, and he had never wanted to do anything more.

Hearing Goku's answering promise in his mind, Vegeta fell completely limp in the gentle embrace, Kakarrot's heartbeat thumping in his ears.

--

"You miss him?"

"Extremely." Raditz tossed away his meat-picked bone, watching the pit fire crackle and sputter. He curled two reassuring arms around his smaller mate, giving a heavy sigh. "He had my sons. I…could never forget him."

Light eyes regarded him with mixed understanding and skepticism. "Hn, I suppose that's reasonable. I'm sure I would feel the same."

"You?" Raditz sniggered in surprise, squeezing a delicate hand in his own. "But I thought we were all monkeys? Surely you wouldn't lower yourself to the standards of an animal like me," the tall Saiyan joked, laughing out loud.

"You want him back?"

"Yes and no," Raditz shook his head, sighing. "I-I don't really want him back. He's happiest with that brother of mine. It's no use the both of us waiting for something that will never happen." He cuffed his lover gently on the shoulder, eyes wide at the surprised glance. "What?"

"What about your brats?" his mate asked in obvious disbelief. "Surely you will go and visit them."

The larger of the two nodded, spiky mane tossed over his right shoulder. "Of course I will. One day." A purely Saiyan smirk crossing his lips, Raditz flipped his lover to the ground, giving the light-skinned thigh a playful slap. "But when I do…don't think I won't be taking you along for the ride." He grinned perversely at his own choice of words, snickering. "C'mon, you know you love it."

Zarbon gave a mock reproachful stare, cheeks darkening to a rather spectacular shade of violet. "Devil," he accused, cerulean leg around Raditz' red-banded thigh. "You certainly belong down here."

"And you don't?"

All conversation lost to the sounds of playful snarls and gentle moans, the scene was, unbeknownst to the lovers, briefly interrupted by a returning Nappa, who, upon realizing exactly what it was he had discovered, pinched the bridge of his nose in annoyance and went lumbering as quickly away as his broad feet would allow.

More than willing to sacrifice the night's meal if it meant distancing himself from the seemingly unnecessarily loud couple, the burly Saiyan took off into the sky, muttering under his breath.

--

FIN X33 I hope you enjoyed. -sniffles- I love you all.


	23. Ended

**Letting Go**

by** icypinkpop**

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there are no late fees…

--

Okay guys, so I've been getting quite a few reviews/messages regarding why I haven't been posting lately for Letting Go. I'm sorry I didn't make this clear (I thought I did. It was in the last few author's notes and end notes…), but _Letting Go_ is DONE. Capoot. Saiyanara. Again, so sorry I didn't seem to make that clear, but I wish people would read the notes so they know what's going on.

Anyways, thanks everyone for reading my story. I really enjoyed all of you and your reviews, and I hope you had as much fun reading this fic as I had writing it.

All my love,

IPP


End file.
